attention ladies
- Thread starter mr_monstrous
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Gilly Bean
Princess Spanky Pants
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2001
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- 7,173
Thank you for the nice warm welcome, Starfish! I am currently living in no-mans land, close to the center of Michigan. AKA, the boonies. I have just recently found this wonderful world of posting, and must say, I spend more time on the boards then I do with any of the stories now. (Though I still love those)
Anyway, thank you for the welcome, and I am also looking forward to getting to know you!
Gilly Bean
Anyway, thank you for the welcome, and I am also looking forward to getting to know you!
Gilly Bean
Dixon Carter Lee
Headliner
- Joined
- Nov 22, 1999
- Posts
- 48,684
Starfish said:
I'd love to, but without anyone watching. With an audience I'd feel obliged to turn the whole thing into a comedy act. "Hello folks! Why is it so hard for a woman to reach orgasm? Who cares? Ba-da-bing! I'll be here all night! Is this an audience or a banner ad? Hello?"
Kasha
Slayer In Training
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2001
- Posts
- 1,204
the onion....
to lighten the mood.....maybe
INSANE CLOWN POSSE GETS RIDE TO CONCERT FROM MOM.
ROYAL OAK, MI—Despite last-minute fears of a concert cancellation due to transportation problems—as well as the fact that it was a school night—Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, the shock-rock rappers known as Insane Clown Posse, managed to make it to their Monday performance at Detroit's Joe Louis Arena after securing a ride from 2 Dope's mom.
"Man, we were so worried we wouldn't be able to get to the concert," J told several social-studies classmates Tuesday. "That would've sucked big-time, because we'd been looking forward to it for, like, weeks and weeks, and all our friends were gonna be there. Luckily, Shaggy's mom totally came through for us, even
if she can be a total bitch sometimes."
The duo, whose The Amazing Jeckel Brothers album made its debut at #4 on the Billboard charts earlier this year, was "really grateful" for the ride, promising to mow the lawn and perform several other household chores in return.
Despite the successful outcome, the pair nearly missed the concert: At approximately 7 p.m., J's mom backed out of her promise to give them a ride, explaining that she had to drive J's sister Stephanie to the mall. When the popular recording group protested, J's mom allegedly told her son, "Maybe you should've thought about how much you didn't want to miss your concert when you forgot to take out the garbage for the third week in a row, even though you were reminded over and over again."
"That sucked ass, big-time," said J at a poolside press conference. "I can't believe she went so crazy just over some stupid garbage. That shit was so wack! She played herself like a straight-up bitch!"
Immediately following the press conference, J was informed that he wouldn't be allowed to use the pool with his friends if he couldn't refrain from using such language in reference to his own mother.
"Sorry, Mom," replied J before silently flipping off his mother once her back was turned.
"Taking out the garbage sucks ass," J added under his breath.
J and 2 Dope, who describe themselves as "psychotic serial killas" and "mad ninja gangstas," are no strangers to controversy. Their 1997 Island Records debut, The Great Milenko, drew fire from religious and moral watchdogs for its "shockingly violent and depraved lyrical content," and had already been pulled from release by another label. More recently, the duo has come under fire from teachers and school administrators for frequent tardiness, "poor attitude" and failing grades in math class, as well as refusal to "dress out" for gym.
"It's such total bullshit that we have to take stupid summer school instead of being in the studio where we belong, just because of some stupid history tests," 2 Dope said. "Summer school is for fucking tools."
Despite the ongoing controversy surrounding Insane Clown Posse, 2 Dope's mom defended her decision to give the group a ride.
"I know some parents wouldn't feel comfortable letting their children perform at a concert like this," she said. "But I know they're just going through a phase. Two years ago, Shaggy's older sister Tracy couldn't stop talking about Marilyn Manson, but she grew out of that. It's important to let them figure these things out for themselves."
Concerned that 2 Dope's mom would insist on attending the concert with them, humiliating them in front of their friends, J and 2 Dope convinced her to drop them off and pick them up later. This was key, a spokesman for Island Records said, because the lack of parental supervision freed the duo to "go totally wild" at the sold-out arena show.
"I made sure they both took a sweater in case they got chilly up there on stage, and on the way we stopped off at the gas station to pick up some extra Faygo pop, which is their favorite," 2 Dope's mom said. "They wanted me to drop them off a block away, so they could go and make their famous entrance from the padded wagon without anyone seeing me. So I just helped them into their straitjackets, and off they went."
2 Dope's mom added that she had taken extra-special effort to wash and starch the pair's trademark straitjackets ahead of time "to make sure they'd look nice for all the people at the show."
Witnesses reported seeing 2 Dope attempt to exit his mother's car without hugging her goodbye, saying, "C'mon, mom, all the Juggalos are gonna make fun of me!" But after being reminded that he was "not too big to give his mother a hug," he relented, eliciting jeers and boos from the many 14-year-old boys present.
"God, that was embarrassing," 2 Dope said. "And the whole way there, she wouldn't shut up about, 'Be sure to call me before 10:30 to pick you up,' and, 'Tone down the violent lyrics: Remember, that's just the sort of thing that got you dropped from [Walt Disney subsidiary] Hollywood [Records].' It was so annoying, I wanted to pull out a machete and just go buck-wild on the bitch's ass, slicin' and dicin' like a maniac psycho-killa ninja, motherfucka! Yeahh, boyee!"
"It was kind of nice of her to pack us those Fruit Roll-Ups, though," 2 Dope conceded. "Thanks, mom."
to lighten the mood.....maybe
INSANE CLOWN POSSE GETS RIDE TO CONCERT FROM MOM.
ROYAL OAK, MI—Despite last-minute fears of a concert cancellation due to transportation problems—as well as the fact that it was a school night—Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, the shock-rock rappers known as Insane Clown Posse, managed to make it to their Monday performance at Detroit's Joe Louis Arena after securing a ride from 2 Dope's mom.
"Man, we were so worried we wouldn't be able to get to the concert," J told several social-studies classmates Tuesday. "That would've sucked big-time, because we'd been looking forward to it for, like, weeks and weeks, and all our friends were gonna be there. Luckily, Shaggy's mom totally came through for us, even
if she can be a total bitch sometimes."
The duo, whose The Amazing Jeckel Brothers album made its debut at #4 on the Billboard charts earlier this year, was "really grateful" for the ride, promising to mow the lawn and perform several other household chores in return.
Despite the successful outcome, the pair nearly missed the concert: At approximately 7 p.m., J's mom backed out of her promise to give them a ride, explaining that she had to drive J's sister Stephanie to the mall. When the popular recording group protested, J's mom allegedly told her son, "Maybe you should've thought about how much you didn't want to miss your concert when you forgot to take out the garbage for the third week in a row, even though you were reminded over and over again."
"That sucked ass, big-time," said J at a poolside press conference. "I can't believe she went so crazy just over some stupid garbage. That shit was so wack! She played herself like a straight-up bitch!"
Immediately following the press conference, J was informed that he wouldn't be allowed to use the pool with his friends if he couldn't refrain from using such language in reference to his own mother.
"Sorry, Mom," replied J before silently flipping off his mother once her back was turned.
"Taking out the garbage sucks ass," J added under his breath.
J and 2 Dope, who describe themselves as "psychotic serial killas" and "mad ninja gangstas," are no strangers to controversy. Their 1997 Island Records debut, The Great Milenko, drew fire from religious and moral watchdogs for its "shockingly violent and depraved lyrical content," and had already been pulled from release by another label. More recently, the duo has come under fire from teachers and school administrators for frequent tardiness, "poor attitude" and failing grades in math class, as well as refusal to "dress out" for gym.
"It's such total bullshit that we have to take stupid summer school instead of being in the studio where we belong, just because of some stupid history tests," 2 Dope said. "Summer school is for fucking tools."
Despite the ongoing controversy surrounding Insane Clown Posse, 2 Dope's mom defended her decision to give the group a ride.
"I know some parents wouldn't feel comfortable letting their children perform at a concert like this," she said. "But I know they're just going through a phase. Two years ago, Shaggy's older sister Tracy couldn't stop talking about Marilyn Manson, but she grew out of that. It's important to let them figure these things out for themselves."
Concerned that 2 Dope's mom would insist on attending the concert with them, humiliating them in front of their friends, J and 2 Dope convinced her to drop them off and pick them up later. This was key, a spokesman for Island Records said, because the lack of parental supervision freed the duo to "go totally wild" at the sold-out arena show.
"I made sure they both took a sweater in case they got chilly up there on stage, and on the way we stopped off at the gas station to pick up some extra Faygo pop, which is their favorite," 2 Dope's mom said. "They wanted me to drop them off a block away, so they could go and make their famous entrance from the padded wagon without anyone seeing me. So I just helped them into their straitjackets, and off they went."
2 Dope's mom added that she had taken extra-special effort to wash and starch the pair's trademark straitjackets ahead of time "to make sure they'd look nice for all the people at the show."
Witnesses reported seeing 2 Dope attempt to exit his mother's car without hugging her goodbye, saying, "C'mon, mom, all the Juggalos are gonna make fun of me!" But after being reminded that he was "not too big to give his mother a hug," he relented, eliciting jeers and boos from the many 14-year-old boys present.
"God, that was embarrassing," 2 Dope said. "And the whole way there, she wouldn't shut up about, 'Be sure to call me before 10:30 to pick you up,' and, 'Tone down the violent lyrics: Remember, that's just the sort of thing that got you dropped from [Walt Disney subsidiary] Hollywood [Records].' It was so annoying, I wanted to pull out a machete and just go buck-wild on the bitch's ass, slicin' and dicin' like a maniac psycho-killa ninja, motherfucka! Yeahh, boyee!"
"It was kind of nice of her to pack us those Fruit Roll-Ups, though," 2 Dope conceded. "Thanks, mom."
Dixon Carter Lee
Headliner
- Joined
- Nov 22, 1999
- Posts
- 48,684
Laurel said:
LOL
KillerMuffin
Seraphically Disinclined
- Joined
- Jul 29, 2000
- Posts
- 25,603
brighid said:
Why is that so horrible?
Because it's wrong. Plain flat wrong. The only reason he wants these fantasies is for his own personal gain. If he made three hundred million dollars off of this "book" he's blathering about, how much would he share with the women who made it possible? He's calling himself the "author" of the book when he's nothing but a glorified "editor"
Money has nothing to do with writing. Ownership has to do with writing.
You're defending a lame horse who is not only NOT going to get anywhere but is probably lying his ass off. No "writer" whose into serious publishing would put out a request for material when he can't even capitalize correctly. What fucked up publisher would publish it, other than the dity publishing at Barnes and Noble?
Nah. This guy is not on the level and I wouldn't have jack shit to do with him. The man is a glorified thief.
BadKarmaFL
Experienced
- Joined
- Apr 9, 2001
- Posts
- 46
Just my personal taste, I don't like ICP nor will I ever, I'm more of an underground hip hop fan myself, but just because someone listens and likes their music doesn't make them an idiot or stupid for listening to them, same with Eminem I rarely like any of his songs but I don't hate on people just because they like him. The music I really get into is the shit that actually tells you a story or isnt just words put together to make it rhyme. I'm not much into listening to artists/groups that are like FUCK FUCK MOTHER FUCK MOTHER FUCKER FUCK FUCK, except for Jay and Silent Bob because that shit was funny, but Common Sense, Mos Def, Talib Kweli, The Last Emperor, all very good artists that explain situations or tells a story.
BK
BK
Laurel
Kitty Mama
- Joined
- Aug 27, 1999
- Posts
- 20,706
My favorite part is when the guy says something like, "Fuck you fags and dykes! I'm doing research!" Only it was totally misspelled. That was awesome.
I also like the anonymous poster going off about how everyone's afraid of Youth Culture. I remember when I thought me and my friends were all badasses who were going to overturn the status quo. Now I talk to them while they strap their offspring into the carseats in their SUVs and they say things like, "I can't believe the language on TV these days! And you should hear the rap record my son brought home!"
You just wait, Mr. Unregistered. You and all your friends will get married, have kids, and become what you despise. And your kids will spout the same crap you're spouting now. And all the corporations making cash off those $45 "Fuck Authority" t-shirts you bought at Hot Topic - they'll be selling the same shit to your kids.
ICP is a product being sold to you by a major label. Every CD you buy helps some A&R guy pay for his BMW. They're selling noncomformity to you, and you're lame enough to be buying it. Don't feel bad - it happens to every generation of kids. But spare me the anti-establishment crap. You're a cog in the wheel, my friend. You ARE the establishment.
If you were serious about all your rhetoric, you'd quit buying those over-priced CDs and $30 ICP t-shirts and support independently released music. You'd educate yourself politically and get active in trying to change all the things you think are so messed up about society. But as long as you're willing to let MTV spoon-feed you rebellion, you can take your "big man" attitude and stick it.
I also like the anonymous poster going off about how everyone's afraid of Youth Culture. I remember when I thought me and my friends were all badasses who were going to overturn the status quo. Now I talk to them while they strap their offspring into the carseats in their SUVs and they say things like, "I can't believe the language on TV these days! And you should hear the rap record my son brought home!"
You just wait, Mr. Unregistered. You and all your friends will get married, have kids, and become what you despise. And your kids will spout the same crap you're spouting now. And all the corporations making cash off those $45 "Fuck Authority" t-shirts you bought at Hot Topic - they'll be selling the same shit to your kids.
ICP is a product being sold to you by a major label. Every CD you buy helps some A&R guy pay for his BMW. They're selling noncomformity to you, and you're lame enough to be buying it. Don't feel bad - it happens to every generation of kids. But spare me the anti-establishment crap. You're a cog in the wheel, my friend. You ARE the establishment.
If you were serious about all your rhetoric, you'd quit buying those over-priced CDs and $30 ICP t-shirts and support independently released music. You'd educate yourself politically and get active in trying to change all the things you think are so messed up about society. But as long as you're willing to let MTV spoon-feed you rebellion, you can take your "big man" attitude and stick it.
Gilly Bean
Princess Spanky Pants
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2001
- Posts
- 7,173
WAY TO GO LAUREL!!!!!!
Gilly Bean
Gilly Bean
BadKarmaFL
Experienced
- Joined
- Apr 9, 2001
- Posts
- 46
LOL Amen Laurel
Dixon Carter Lee
Headliner
- Joined
- Nov 22, 1999
- Posts
- 48,684
I LOVE listening to teens and 20-somethings desperatley try to convince me how street and anti-establishment they are while wearing $200 Nikes, paying $9 to see "Planet of the Apes", watching commericals for Zit Cream during MTV's "Real World" and buying hook, line and sinker the poser mythos of some band that spells everything with "Z" instead of "S".
Savage Kitten
Image IS Everything
- Joined
- Apr 16, 2000
- Posts
- 2,677
KillerMuffin said:
ummm I guess the question is..... how many Lit'ers thought he meant gigalo? Cause I am sure he didn't.
I think his biggest mistake was coming to the BB where a majority of Lit's talented writers spend their time. Common sense would tell him that people who have the creativity and ability to create their own stories worthy of publishing wouldn't freely offer up their "fantasies" for someone else to profit from.
I won't slight him for trying though. I've came up with with ideas for great stories much the same way, just in a less "upscale" place/BB.
Try here... don't do a lot of explaining as you did here.... just ask for fantasies or ask for their most wicked desires.... be forewarned and be prepared for some perversion! haha If I used an idea I sent the person a copy of the story, if they provided an email addy. Also, don't expect much verbage or grammical correctness....
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