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[Bookishleigh]

Thank you so much for all of your insight. Very informative.
Of

It’s interesting this thread got bumped when it did. Saturday night I went to an event and saw a very hardcore scene (like it was hard for me to watch and I never could “play” at that level). Anyway, when the scene was finished the Domme told the submissive she would check on her in a couple days too.

 

[Angedesoleil]

She is, we still keep in touch.

If we'd have met 5-10 years later, we'd have married.

However, we were never interested in each other at the same time.

Just friends who came together.

I could have written that, just change the genders.

 

[Tank08]

Subspace is hard to describe. It’s such a personal experience, it’s harder to talk about. But I’ve reached this a few times and it’s been during the same activity. Does it make sense to say he’s good at receiving a bj? He knows how to touch me, hold my hair back, force his cock down my throat at just the right time, when to choke me and when to let me up for air. I don’t think you can achieve subspace without tremendous trust. I love giving this to him to a point that I crave that time and I love his attention. Don’t really know when subspace hits I just know that I’m enjoying what I’m doing so much that I can’t see anything around me. I lose track of time and depend on him to bring me back. Usually have tears in my eyes but not really crying. Not sure why? Endorphins maybe? I could play with his cock for hours. I read someone describes it as being drunk and I think that’s perfect. You’re there but not really.

 

[suboots]

The comparison with being drunk is a good one. I first noticed subspace after a session had concluded and I was in the local supermarket. It kind of felt as if I was walking on air and very lightheaded. I have not quite worked out exactly how it is brought on because that session was a fairly light one.

Last weekend I had a much heavier, longer session. The conclusion involved fifteen strokes of the cane, the last three delivered at full power. ( she is petite but athletic, quite powerful) They were hard enough to draw blood. I noticed a serenity and a desire for sleep about an hour later, but not the full subspace effect.

 

[Emirus]

*

Subspace has certainly nothing to do with orgasm but is an altered state of mind. It's described by those above very well – it's where the body and mind enter a lax sense of self and existence as if they can't tell the difference between themselves and the world around them. A type of blending happens where their consciousness is abandoned and they experience another dimension of being, a euphoria or a sense of release.

I assume when you say that subspace has nothing to do with orgasm you mean, in a man, ejaculation and I would agree entirely. I agree entirely with the rest of your description.

I’ve seen many mistresses over the years and I’ve only experienced once a situation when I was in a state of euphoria and had no control over my body. Whether that’s because I’m not actually submissive but enjoy playing the role I don’t know. Fortunately it was right at the end of my last session and with a mistress I was seeing for the second time and involved an Hitachi wand. I’ve experienced the effect of a wand many times but never as she used it on this occasion.

She massaged my prostate with the wand via my perinaeum. The bit between the scrotum and anus in a male. As soon as she hit the spot I lost complete control of my body. I’ve had the pleasure of being on the male end of a female orgasm a few times and, to me, it seems like the male equivelant. My whole body shook, arms and fingers and involuntarily opening my knees, and I bounced on the bed. If it had been a double domme session the other mistress would have been able to do anything with me and I would have been unable to stop her.

After the wand was removed I had to lay on the bed for about 10 minutes before I felt confident enough to stand and as I made my way to the en suite bathroom for a shower I was on very shaky legs. I’m visiting another mistress for the first time in a few weeks and will ask her to use a wand in the same way to see if the situation can be recreated. I will be extremely disappointed if that can’t be done.

 

[chy_girl]

Subspace is just an endorphin rush. Literally. Understanding the biology and physiology behind it was extremely helpful to me because I could understand that it wasn't something magically bestowed upon me by my PYLs. It wasn't something beyond my control. I also learned that I had responsibilities with it because my safety is my job, too.

If I was able to hit subspace it was like I was drunk or high, only better. Like mentally and physically getting temporarily released from reality in a warm, loose jointed kind of way. Sometimes I would get the shakes, sometimes I'd get lightheaded, I can get very giggly and every damned time I have a hard time talking. We actually had to modify our safeword plan because I go non-verbal... we learned that one the hard way. I don't have to be with an intimate partner for it to happen, but if I wasn't with a partner I always made sure that people I knew and trusted were around (and going to be around). I always talked to at least one friend in advance to let them know what play I planning on and could they keep an eye out.

I also learned that if I'm not careful I crash. Hard. For a couple of days afterwards. Chocolate and caffeine (preferably in the form of a mocha) actually helped me with this. Someone explained the science to me but the TL;DR version is that by consuming a mocha on the way home it kept the endorphins from subspace artificially elevated till the caffeine and chocolate wore off naturally providing me a much softer landing in the morning. It sounds dumb, but it worked.

And as a side note, there's such a thing as Top space as well. Because science is awesome like that.

 

[Taradora]

It would be awesome

To fly all day

 

[Mirisa]

I would agree with the euphoria. It is a sense of floating, complete and total contentment. It feels like everything in my body is free and happy. It is a beautiful thing. It can take awhile before I'm able to talk or move. I'm content to just be there.

I've never been with someone in real life who considered himself a Dom. I have had partners who have enjoyed the spanking. Long, intense sessions of vanilla sex have put me there, group sex almost always. I had a phone sex partner once who could get me to that point of subspace.

For the very intense subspace I'll be sex high for hours after and then crash the next day at some point. The crashing can be a bit rough. It reminds me a bit of when I'm going through withdrawal from sugar or caffeine. I'll usually just go to bed early that night and be fine the next day.

 

[Angedesoleil]

I'm impressed by this for some reason: "I had a phone sex partner once who could get me to that point of subspace" ... I'm interested to know how because I really cant fathom it. I dont doubt it, I just cant get to the HOW.

 

[newhere2learn]

I could have written that, just change the genders.

Gut wrenching isn't it?

Bumped into her at work a month back. 12 year on, hasn't changed an iota physically, calmed a little personality wise. Even 2 kids hadn't changed her figure.


Stood their in her work uniform, I was picturing her in her lace thong and bra, undone, laid across my sofa, slowly trailing her fingernails up my leaking cock.... As I gasp, and beg for release.

Her laughing, saying I hadn't earned it.


My wife and kids were stood with me, chatting to her.

 

[puppett]

*

I don't want to have romantic relationships with my subs so I don't indulge in this practice because it is very powerful and I find it makes subs fall in love with you. Subspace can become an addiction too, both for the giver and receiver. I wouldn't advise anyone to practice this unless they already have a romantic or committed relationship with each other. The bond that it can create is amazing but it needs to be practiced in SSC atmosphere.

This... so much...

I fell in love with someone on our first meet and for them it was just an experimental time.... haven’t gotten over it completely and it’s been years...

 

[AnhedonicDementic]

Is subspace possible to actualize in a virtual d/s relationship?

 

[PrettyLilPussy]

Is subspace possible to actualize in a virtual d/s relationship?

I will interested to see other's answers but I would say - it's different, it takes work but... yes

 

[Farawyn]

Is subspace possible to actualize in a virtual d/s relationship?

I will interested to see other's answers but I would say - it's different, it takes work but... yes

Having had both I would say not really.

You can go to another space, but it’s not the same. At least not for me.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Is subspace possible to actualize in a virtual d/s relationship?

Certainly this is possible for domspace, and I believe it to be true for subspace - given, of course, the person and relationship. Beware all absolutes in D/s except for beware all absolutes.

 

[seela]

Certainly this is possible for domspace, and I believe it to be true for subspace - given, of course, the person and relationship. Beware all absolutes in D/s except for beware all absolutes.

Hey, it's DGE!

I haven't seen you around for a while.


As for subspace, haven't really been there, or at least I don't think so.

I'm more familiar with this hyperfocused state that I get to sometimes where I just say yes to absolutely everything, because the only thing that matters there and then is what the PYL wants and my only goal is to give it to them. Maybe that's a type of subspace, I don't know.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Hey, it's DGE!

I haven't seen you around for a while.

Seeeeeela...

Hey. I’ve had 5.3 intensive and sustained life events going on! But I know that when I get that down to 2.7 I will have so much to contribute to this forum. It began today, with my trenchant commentary on subspace. I can feel it.

[I am sorry for this threadjack.]

 

[Angedesoleil]

I was kinda getting at that when I asked "how" to the person who said they reached it on the phone. Maybe? But for me i highly doubt it. Sir can certainly put my in a different frame of mind with just a word, a tone of voice...But that isn't subspace. That requires physical contact for me. I think it would be frightening to go there without him physically present.

 

[suboots]

Further to my post 29# I had a session on Sunday with the same Domme. After a warm up with a tawse and an Argentine gaucho whip mistress produced a third implement. It was a modern reproduction of a sjambok in tan braided leather and it's punch put me there in three strokes. She enjoyed it so much that she very politely apologised and backtracked on that sentence and gave me another three.

Immediately afterwards I was suspended inverted from her hoist. Swinging gently to and fro, powered by the occasional push of her Laboutin boot. I lapsed totally and irretrievably into subspace. The effects lasted throughout my drive home where I took to my bed and slept soundly for several hours. A wonderful experience recalled every time I see the still vivid sjambok lines in the mirror.

 

[RopeBunny69]

For me, it's like floating. I honestly miss it as I haven't been able to achieve it for a few months now.
But my biggest piece of advice is to talk them through coming down, personally (and this could be just me), coming out of it can be a little emotional due to vulnerability of it. So, if my Dom suddenly has to go afterwards, it can be very challenging for my mental state.

 

[sweettalk4u]

I’ve read comments in here about subspace, and of course I’ve researched it a little. I would like for Litbmembers to describe what subspace is to them. How do you achieve it? Perhaps describe the first time you were in subspace.

It is where the sub has been held on the edge to near exhaustion. The blood flow to the brain has been reduced for a long enough period of time to put them in a trance like state. Been on both sides. It can be pure ecstasy but establishing a proper relationship before makes it much easier and better