First Person or Third Person?

[sirhugs]

Not sure whether or not it will really become submission number 200, but starting to just play around to try to develo something out of the incest, tentacle monster, crossdressing idea (see Story Ideas thread). Right now, the idea ids that daughter number one, age 22, discoovers that their new bakyard pool comes with a TM. Dad starts out eing a voyuer of the action, then has the inevitable incestuous urges. Daughter number two, who mightor might not be a twin, becomes jealous. Will see where tht goes. Mom discovers Dad's transgressions, but after her initial nger, discovers she is jealous - of Dad having sex with daughter, of daughter having sex with TM. i think that it is Mom who is the cross dresser, but haven't figured out how this fits.

My AH type question for today is - am I writing this in first person, like most of my Dad/daughter tales, or third person, which I have used before for "family fun"?

 

[TheLobster]

Looks like the story would feature quite a few characters that get roughly an equal share of the action, so third person with shifting PoVs seem like an obvious choice.

Alternatively, you could perhaps make Dad into the 1P PoV character, since he seems to be at the locus of all the events you've mentioned so far. His perspective would also make it easier / more erotic to picture his growing incestuous lust.

However, if you want to get really cheeky, write it all from the semi-peripheral, first-person perspective of the tentacle monster, and write all those weird human shenanigans from an eldritch PoV.

 

[TheWritingGroup]

I can see doing it from the daughter's 1P perspective, and it turns out that the TM is the dad, who was always an alien shapeshifter. She starts asking, "So am I adopted?"

And then her own alien traits manifest.

 

[sirhugs]

I can see doing it from the daughter's 1P perspective, and it turns out that the TM is the dad, who was always an alien shapeshifter. She starts asking, "So am I adopted?"

And then her own alien traits manifest.

very creative, thought provoking...but what if the Mom is the TM?

 

[sirhugs]

Looks like the story would feature quite a few characters that get roughly an equal share of the action, so third person with shifting PoVs seem like an obvious choice.

Alternatively, you could perhaps make Dad into the 1P PoV character, since he seems to be at the locus of all the events you've mentioned so far. His perspective would also make it easier / more erotic to picture his growing incestuous lust.

However, if you want to get really cheeky, write it all from the semi-peripheral, first-person perspective of the tentacle monster, and write all those weird human shenanigans from an eldritch PoV.

The TM! Now that's a POV that i never tought of, which would be really challenging- but how would the human and human sex get captured?

I think the trouble for me with Dad's 1P POv , which I started to default to before I paused, was how to apture the daughter/daughter and Mom/daughter or Mom/TM sex- is it all jst told as him being a vioyuer? Even tome, thatseems a bit creepy.

 

[TheLobster]

but how would the human and human sex get captured?

The TM gets interested and start sneakily crawling out of the pool and across the outer walls of the house to peek through the windows.

I think the trouble for me with Dad's 1P POv , which I started to default to before I paused, was how to apture the daughter/daughter and Mom/daughter or Mom/TM sex- is it all jst told as him being a vioyuer?

Right, if it's indeed whole family and there's no central character whom it all revolves around, a series of 3P scenes with different PoVs is the most straightforward and effective option.

 

[sirhugs]

Right, if it's indeed whole family and there's no central character whom it all revolves around, a series of 3P scenes with different PoVs is the most straightforward and effective option.

Definitely a pssible solution, but I know myself, and my tendency to view the dad chracters as the centeal character unless I positively make someone else central, like the female lead in my Grandpa,Wake Up series. I would need to go back and revisit some of my "full family" fictions to find the groove, I guess. It could be done, maybe.

 

[TheWritingGroup]

The tentacle monster is hermaphroditic, using Earth terminology. It's consciously doing stuff to attract the dad (and the mom, little brother, neighbors, the mail carrier, and anyone else it can) into its clutches, to extract their genetic material for its next brood. Of hundreds. Who need host mothers.

 

[BeechLeaf]

You definitely need a distinctive angle to make it stand out from all the run-of-the-mill incest, tentacle monster, crossdressing stories.

 

[Rambling_Chantrix]

However, if you want to get really cheeky, write it all from the semi-peripheral, first-person perspective of the tentacle monster, and write all those weird human shenanigans from an eldritch PoV.

Came here to say this

 

[Britva415]

daughter number one, age 22, discoovers that their new bakyard pool comes with a TM. Dad starts out eing a voyuer of the action, then has the inevitable incestuous urges. Daughter number two, who mightor might not be a twin, becomes jealous. Will see where tht goes. Mom discovers Dad's transgressions, but after her initial nger, discovers she is jealous

Reading that, I see that you want to show or tell (take your pick) at least three different people's experiences and motivations.

That's going to be hard to do with 1p, but will come naturally with 3p.

 

[SimonDoom]

This idea sounds like third person, from multiple perspectives, is the best fit. It sounds like a "family fun" sort of story, but with tentacles.

Here's a fun idea: Have them all captured by a secretive agency of the federal government, and the story is told from the POV of each participant, including the tentacle monster, to the agents as they are each being separately grilled about what happened.

Tentacle monster, grilled, under the lamp: "Look, I was just there on a mission to observe. Before I know it, I get caught up in all this human family craziness. I'm a thousand light years away from home and I'm lonely. This girl comes on to me. What am I supposed to do? All I know is I didn't sign up for this shit when I took on the mission. I'm a scientist."

 

[AStrangeDesire]

Looks like the story would feature quite a few characters that get roughly an equal share of the action, so third person with shifting PoVs seem like an obvious choice.

Alternatively, you could perhaps make Dad into the 1P PoV character, since he seems to be at the locus of all the events you've mentioned so far. His perspective would also make it easier / more erotic to picture his growing incestuous lust.

However, if you want to get really cheeky, write it all from the semi-peripheral, first-person perspective of the tentacle monster, and write all those weird human shenanigans from an eldritch PoV.

^ love that last suggestion. The Eldritch POV with the TM going, "WTF is wrong with these naked-apes, I got enough tentacles for everyone!"

 

[TheWritingGroup]

The other angle might be to have the TM really be the Evil From Beyond The Stars, and the family has to unite to escape it ... and the dad is the weak link, helplessly addicted to the pleasures of its slippery appendages. Will his loyalty to his family overcome its temptations?

 

[ElectricBlue]

My AH type question for today is - am I writing this in first person, like most of my Dad/daughter tales, or third person, which I have used before for "family fun"?

I remain perplexed as to why pov seems to be such a difficult choice for some writers. Start with your pov of choice, and if it doesn't work, change it.

This doesn't really require a committee, surely?

 

[anthrodisiac]

I remain perplexed as to why pov seems to be such a difficult choice for some writers. Start with your pov of choice, and if it doesn't work, change it.

This doesn't really require a committee, surely?

It surely does!

Second person!

 

[sirhugs]

I remain perplexed as to why pov seems to be such a difficult choice for some writers. Start with your pov of choice, and if it doesn't work, change it.

This doesn't really require a committee, surely?

Maybe its a sign that the idea is not yet fuully baked, or of my general mental state, but I dont really hace a choice of POV other than my usual instinct to default to first person for incest, but that is countered by the nagging feelng that some of the action takes pace beyond Dad's presence. My own darn fault for developing the plot before I start writing.

 

[sirhugs]

It surely does!

Second person!

You devil. You know I hate second person.

 

[anthrodisiac]

You devil. You know I hate second person.

*cackles adorably*

I think it should be a femboi cuttlefish TM in the cutest polka-dot bikini, maybe his mom's or sister's.

1P is great for really intimate exploration of the characters. If you wanna do a deep dive on thoughts and motivations, 1P is a solid choice. 3P is better if you don't wanna dive too deep into all the complexities of thoughts. I generally treat 1P as a character-first style, and 3P as a story-first style. Generally. Very, very generally.

So, depending on what the focus of the story is, that should help inform which POV best suits your goals for how you intend to tell it and which elements you plan to focus most on.

 

[AStrangeDesire]

*cackles adorably*

I think it should be a femboi cuttlefish TM in the cutest polka-dot bikini, maybe his mom's or sister's.

1P is great for really intimate exploration of the characters. If you wanna do a deep dive on thoughts and motivations, 1P is a solid choice. 3P is better if you don't wanna dive too deep into all the complexities of thoughts. I generally treat 1P as a character-first style, and 3P as a story-first style. Generally. Very, very generally.

So, depending on what the focus of the story is, that should help inform which POV best suits your goals for how you intend to tell it and which elements you plan to focus most on.

So, 2P as the tentacle monster.

Make the reader the TM.

 

[ElectricBlue]

1P is great for really intimate exploration of the characters. If you wanna do a deep dive on thoughts and motivations, 1P is a solid choice.

I reckon close third can be just as intimate, and at times, even more so, because (shock, horror) you can change the pov to another character.

You're perpetuating a myth, I think.

3P is better if you don't wanna dive too deep into all the complexities of thoughts.

See comment above. You can dive just as deep in close third.

I generally treat 1P as a character-first style, and 3P as a story-first style. Generally. Very, very generally.

I'm glad you have the caveat. I really do think these "guidelines" are writers' myths, and illustrate only that writers should stretch their legs more.

 

[anthrodisiac]

I reckon close third can be just as intimate, and at times, even more so, because (shock, horror) you can change the pov to another character.

You're perpetuating a myth, I think.

See comment above. You can dive just as deep in close third.

I'm glad you have the caveat. I really do think these "guidelines" are writers' myths, and illustrate only that writers should stretch their legs more.

Hence why I try to speak in generalities about these things, not absolutes. I'm of the opinion there are no hard rules for writing. The only one being, maybe, "You actually have to write something to be considered writing." Other than that? Nah. Even spelling and grammar aren't hard rules. We break them all the time with dialogue and voice.

I've seen stories written in third-person omniscient that are way more intimate than first-person, and first-person stories that don't bother to take a close look at the thoughts and feelings of the person's head we're in. That's because the execution is what truly matters. What I mentioned was one aspect of my considerations when I'm looking at choosing a POV — though there are many things to consider beyond that.

If you look at the styles themselves, without factoring in skill or story, then first-person structurally and stylistically tends to lend itself better to inward-facing stories because the narrative is explicitly written in the voice of the character (hence forcing the writer and reader to view the story through the lens of that character; literally inside the person's head, not much more intimate than that, all else being equal), and third-person lends itself better to outward-facing stories because the voice belongs to someone (usually) detached from events.

But really, at the end of the day, it's all about the execution above all else.

 

[consistentlyrepudiated]

Choosing a POV happens intuitively (or maybe randomly) at the birth of the tale. Changing it afterward would be like a gender reassignment surgery. My excuse for the first person is that whatever happens in the protagonist's head--the way they perceive things--is more intriguing than the happenings themselves, but that is usually just a post-hoc rationalization.

 

[sirhugs]

Choosing a POV happens intuitively (or maybe randomly) at the birth of the tale. Changing it afterward would be like a gender reassignment surgery. My excuse for the first person is that whatever happens in the protagonist's head--the way they perceive things--is more intriguing than the happenings themselves, but that is usually just a post-hoc rationalization.

That may be the usuaal situation, but what about when "intuitively" or "randomly" tosses up conflicting possibilities? That is my conundrum.

As I think I noted above, it may be my own darn fault. Normally, I'm a pantser, but this time I actually sat down and sketched out plot and characters, rather than just seeing what happens next. I may have over complicated things. Definitely lost the feel for it.

 

[consistentlyrepudiated]

That may be the usuaal situation, but what about when "intuitively" or "randomly" tosses up conflicting possibilities? That is my conundrum.

As I think I noted above, it may be my own darn fault. Normally, I'm a pantser, but this time I actually sat down and sketched out plot and characters, rather than just seeing what happens next. I may have over complicated things. Definitely lost the feel for it.

I don’t understand; it’s a matter of form, not substance. If we compare it to cinema, you choose between a panoramic view (omniscient), a POV shot (first), or an over-the-shoulder shot (close third). In any case, the rendering method shouldn't create a conflict. A skilled director will produce a good movie regardless.