General Disclaimer:

[ohfaque]

I wasn't aware that I needed your permission to use certain words.

What you don't seem to understand is that many of us are no longer willing to act like nice little boys and girls and beg society to pretty please let us be who we are. We don't need your approval.

Who said you needed my permission? Keep grasping bro. Your argument is weak. I only stated my opinion, I never said what you could and couldn't do.

Proof is in the posts.

Oh and as for my approval. I am for homosexual Marriage and domestic partnership.

I never said one thing that was anti gay. I just felt that gays using derogitory terms is not any better then non-gays using them.

You can dislike that all you want, but you have no arguement here.

 

[Queersetti]

Who said you needed my permission? Keep grasping bro. Your argument is weak. I only stated my opinion, I never said what you could and couldn't do.

Proof is in the posts.

Oh and as for my approval. I am for homosexual Marriage and domestic partnership.

I never said one thing that was anti gay. I just felt that gays using derogitory terms is not any better then non-gays using them.

You can dislike that all you want, but you have no arguement here.

I do have an argument, and it is quite clear and simple.

You are not gay, so you don't get to decide what is or is not appropriate language for gays to use to describe their own reality.

I wouldn't presume to tell blacks whether or not they should use the word "nigger" for whatever purpose they desire. I lack the fundamental basis to address the issue. Just as you lack the fundamental basis to address this one.

I don't expect you to agree with me or that, but can you at least show some sign that you get it?

 

[zipman]

the view you subscribe to is unpopular.

by embracing the word "nigger" black people have illustrated just how wrong it is to use it.

personally i understand a lot of what you say~i don't like the word nigger being used in any way much in the same way i don't really care for using the word fag in polite conversation or as a term of endearment~it is an insult~and as long as it is it will also be there to remind you of it.

now as for how vixenshe chooses to label herself...yes~she can lovingly refer to herself as whatever makes her happiest.

which is why i prefer "gay" myself.

I still think that black people have made it more acceptable to use the word "nigger" by using it in a friendly and joking manner with each other. But I'm okay with us disagreeing on that small point.

As for the rest of your post, I couldn't agree more.

 

[phrodeau]

Well ok then, since you say it's ok, then it's ok to call everyone you feel like a degrading name.


You can call yourself whatever you want, refer to yourself however you want, but I think calling another person a fag or a faery is crude and uncalled for.

Good for you. But then...

Just tell me, why is it ok for her to call someone a fag, but not me? Not that I ever would, but it seems to be a bit hypocritical.

Where did this come from? What makes you think it's not OK for you to use a word? The hypocrisy you sense isn't really here.

 

[glamorilla]

I still think that black people have made it more acceptable to use the word "nigger" by using it in a friendly and joking manner with each other. But I'm okay with us disagreeing on that small point.

As for the rest of your post, I couldn't agree more.

What you have to understand is the basis of a slur of endearment. it not only serves to empower through oppressed identification but as a warning to those who would use it otherwise.

the same holds true for the word "bitch".

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

okay

I read through the thread, twice...just to make sure i understood it. Basically, someone objected to terms that they considered derogatory. The original starter of this thread posted to let people know that she was not TRYING to make any one feel badly...this was just how she commonly uses those particular expressions. Other people defended both people's rights to say what they were for or against...yes?

Well, here is my point...i don't care what words are used by whom for whatever reason. Words are just that...they are only harmful if the person hearing them takes them that way. Case in point...as every one has so gallantly brought up this evening *NIGGER* the connotations of that word reflect slavery...a menial, less than human....someone who is worthless, property. No matter how you say it and no matter who says it...it is still a nasty word for a nasty idea.

I feel that way about any derogatory term...be it faggot, dyke, bitch or what have you. Using it does not make the feelings behind it any less hurtful or cruel. Do i use those words...even though i consider myself to be a bi female....NO. Will I defend the right of anyone who wants to use those terms if they are part of a down-trodden community, YES!!!

We are the ones who hear it, day in and day out...not the straight people...so if someone feels empowered by taking the words and making them their own...more power to them. That does not mean that i will like them or want to hear them...it just means that we have free speech and what is the point if we don't exercise our rights...by agreeing or disagreeing...

Done now...
PET

 

[ohfaque]

I do have an argument, and it is quite clear and simple.

You are not gay, so you don't get to decide what is or is not appropriate language for gays to use to describe their own reality.

I wouldn't presume to tell blacks whether or not they should use the word "nigger" for whatever purpose they desire. I lack the fundamental basis to address the issue. Just as you lack the fundamental basis to address this one.

I don't expect you to agree with me or that, but can you at least show some sign that you get it?

We can argue this forever, you will never see the point I was making. It all goes back to what you think Gays can do. Ok, like I said, you will never get it.

 

[ohfaque]

Good for you. But then...
Where did this come from? What makes you think it's not OK for you to use a word? The hypocrisy you sense isn't really here.

It came from the idea that they are saying it is absolutly ok for them to call other people, who may be hurt by their words, fairiies or fags, just because they themselves is gay. I do not agree.

Me being a straight man, if I called anyone a fag or fairy, it would be totally unacceptable.


That's where it came from.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

And by the way, no, I am not GAY, but I am halfway there... I, and my friends in RL often call me the half-dyke, because I love women, but I'm not a lesbian. I have a lot of gay friends in real life, and while I would call THEM queers and faeries, etc, I wouldn't call some gay person I didn't know by that term. In my posts I have often addressed myself and gays in general as queer. I haven't called anyone on the boards a faerie, but I included the term in this thread because it is one that I do use in RL with friends. My starting of this thread was to ensure to everyone that when I use those words (especially queer) I am using them because I am comfortable with that word. If someone who was gay asked me to not use the word when referring to that person, I wouldn't, because it bothers them.

I identify as queer. It is how I think of myself, even if I'm not gay.

You have no right to tell me how I should identify myself.

Your "she's not gay" argument is weak.. it's like the typical shit that bisexual people get... we're not gay, we're not straight, we're something in the middle...

as that.. I choose queer.

 

[glamorilla]

It came from the idea that they are saying it is absolutly ok for them to call other people, who may be hurt by their words, fairiies or fags, just because they themselves is gay. I do not agree.

Me being a straight man, if I called anyone a fag or fairy, it would be totally unacceptable.


That's where it came from.

why would you call someone a fag or a fairy?

 

[Pookie]

For me, it's the intent behind the words that are used. My roomies and I call each other "bitch", "slut", "dyke", "little whore", etc. quite often. It's always said in an affectionate way. We don't say it to each other in a manner to be hurtful or derogatory. I know when they use those terms with me, it's meant to be affectionate.

Now if someone else starts using those words with me, I will immediately question the motive behind them. Many times their is the immediate assumption that it is derogatory. Usually that is the case too. But with my friends and lover, I know from their expressions and voice what they mean when they say it to me.

 

[alltherage]

For me, it's the intent behind the words that are used. My roomies and I call each other "bitch", "slut", "dyke", "little whore", etc. quite often. It's always said in an affectionate way. We don't say it to each other in a manner to be hurtful or derogatory. I know when they use those terms with me, it's meant to be affectionate.

Now if someone else starts using those words with me, I will immediately question the motive behind them. Many times their is the immediate assumption that it is derogatory. Usually that is the case too. But with my friends and lover, I know from their expressions and voice what they mean when they say it to me.

Yep

 

[MzChrista]

It came from the idea that they are saying it is absolutly ok for them to call other people, who may be hurt by their words, fairiies or fags, just because they themselves is gay. I do not agree.

Me being a straight man, if I called anyone a fag or fairy, it would be totally unacceptable.


That's where it came from.

Oh boo hoo.

Queers get one tiny little privilege straights dont and THATS an issue?

 

[destinie21]

Who said you needed my permission? Keep grasping bro. Your argument is weak. I only stated my opinion, I never said what you could and couldn't do.

Proof is in the posts.

Oh and as for my approval. I am for homosexual Marriage and domestic partnership.

I never said one thing that was anti gay. I just felt that gays using derogitory terms is not any better then non-gays using them.

You can dislike that all you want, but you have no arguement here.

QUOTE]Originally posted by ohfaque
Who said you needed my permission? Keep grasping bro. Your argument is weak. I only stated my opinion, I never said what you could and couldn't do.

Proof is in the posts.

Oh and as for my approval. I am for homosexual Marriage and domestic partnership.

I never said one thing that was anti gay. I just felt that gays using derogitory terms is not any better then non-gays using them.

You can dislike that all you want, but you have no arguement here. [/QUOTE]

just wanted to state my opinion as well
basically I fell that such slang terms are a "family affair" I happen to be both black and a lesbian BTW. what I mean by that is this
my sister and I are like any other sisters out there we fight(though on the whole we are a pretty close familyand my relationship w/my sis is good) we also joke and in doing so it's perfectly okay for me to call her a bitch either in anger or jokingly. But if I hear someone outside the family/approved friend saying it I'll fight them. see what I'm saying I think the same thing applies here