I was very fortunate. I met a man here who became my Dominant. We explored and learned about each other. We shared real intimacy.We were togeather for 14 months. We only met once but it was the most amazing and sexually realeasing day of my life.
Sadly I flounted his rules. On reflection to get his attention. My personal insecurities led to me doubting him and turned me into an attention seeking brat.
Communication was always hard as we had "real lives" and i think we sadly often misunderstood each others intentions and meanings.
I was the one who asked for realease as I couldn't stand constantly failing and disappointing him.
Odd isn't it in life that you don't realise how special something is until its gone. I miss him like a part of me has been taken away and would do anything to be where we were again.
I grieve for him.
Sorry for my emotional post. But its not something I can discuss with "friends". But I needed to vent.
And maybe a little advice of how to get over the pain of my loss which I only have myself to blame for.
Sadly I flounted his rules. On reflection to get his attention. My personal insecurities led to me doubting him and turned me into an attention seeking brat.
Communication was always hard as we had "real lives" and i think we sadly often misunderstood each others intentions and meanings.
I was the one who asked for realease as I couldn't stand constantly failing and disappointing him.
Odd isn't it in life that you don't realise how special something is until its gone. I miss him like a part of me has been taken away and would do anything to be where we were again.
I grieve for him.
Sorry for my emotional post. But its not something I can discuss with "friends". But I needed to vent.
And maybe a little advice of how to get over the pain of my loss which I only have myself to blame for.
