Is happiness a choice?

[dolf]

Also, Candi would swallow if he blew the devil, so coffee is fine.

 

[CandiCame]

Candi, you have a seriously fucked up life.

Also, scooping brains out of the carpet goes above and beyond any reasonable expectation of friendship. Shit like this is why I like you.

Candi fun fact! That guy is the one that I think I told yhall about when I met him. The Jehova's witness I fucked and let tell me about Jesus. That's how we met. I think you know this story.

I know you're supposed to slam the door in their face but guys I was a strung out club kid who had had a party the night before, there was a tent in my living room for hotboxing joints, there was a motion activated Willy Wonka figure that said phrases from the Depp movie- don't judge me, we didn't know yet- just trying to set the scene for the shittiest college apartment possible. I hadn't even been to bed and was riding that line between drunk and hungover because I'd ingested I think 0 food besides kool-aid and vodka the previous day and was still up from the party. I open this door wondering who the fuck would knock because the whole floor had come to the party, so everybody FUCKING KNEW BETTER THEY KNEW I AND MY ROOMMATE WOULD BE HUNGOVER-

But it was the most beautiful Jehova's witness I'd ever seen. And me standing there in yesterday's makeup with my purple hair and some guy I kind of knew sleeping on my couch.

He was all, "Have you heard about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?" or whatever and I looked behind me at the paint-by-number last supper hanging in my kitchen, and I opened my mouth and said to him;

"No, absolutely not, never heard of him, please come inside and tell me all about it. Someone is sleeping on my couch, so we'll have to go to my bedroom."

I like to remember him as the cute innocent little soul I corrupted and not the violent end to his life. He was a really good guy. He treated me great except for the 'being a secret' thing and I get that.

Edit: One time he stole me a pallet of pixi styx from the Amazon warehouse he worked at and to this day I have no idea how he did it. It wasn't something you could walk out the door with, it was a wooden pallet.

 

[CandiCame]

Also, Candi would swallow if he blew the devil, so coffee is fine.

I have never understood the point of spitting out cum. Like it's already in your mouth? If you don't like the taste it's gonna take longer to find something to spit it into that it is to swallow it.

Like I don't get why spitting is a thing.

So like, you're not wrong but it's not exclusive to the devil. I always swallow. Devil cum probably gives you temporary superpowers, too. There's legends about demon blood doing that so like... it's not far fetched, is all I'm saying.

Hit me up, Luci.

 

[dolf]

Yeah, once it's in your mouth it's a bit late. And that's why I make sure they know that I have teeth

 

[doowdniw]

Diabetes is a choice.

Tell that to your pancreas. And liver.

 

[CandiCame]

Candi, you have a seriously fucked up life.

Also, scooping brains out of the carpet goes above and beyond any reasonable expectation of friendship. Shit like this is why I like you.

Also, wouldn't no scooping to it. The damn cops just left that shit there for like, I can't remember but more than a week while they did cop shit even though they knew who did it. But the time we got there I was down there with a brush and spray cleaner like fuckin Cinderella.

Was not in a great mood and not able to put up with anyone else's bullshit.

Yeah, once it's in your mouth it's a bit late. And that's why I make sure they know that I have teeth

Oooooh, look at me, I'm dolf and I have teeth. I'm not in pain. I can chew with both sides of my mouth.

Tooth brag.

Edit: Yhall I had to go through Thanksgiving like that.

 

[thør]

Don't worry, be happy.

Yupper!

 

[dolf]

Once I had Jehovah's witnesses knock. I opened the door, the lady I vaguely recognised from the school gate, flustered and said "oh, it's you!", turned around and walked away. They never returned. Clearly I've been joho blacklisted, but I'll be buggered if I know why.

 

[Kirkrapine]

I have never understood the point of spitting out cum. Like it's already in your mouth? If you don't like the taste it's gonna take longer to find something to spit it into that it is to swallow it.

Like I don't get why spitting is a thing.

So like, you're not wrong but it's not exclusive to the devil. I always swallow. Devil cum probably gives you temporary superpowers, too. There's legends about demon blood doing that so like... it's not far fetched, is all I'm saying.

Hit me up, Luci.

Yeah, but according to the Malleus Maleficarum, the Devil's cock is festooned with fishhooks, and his semen is icy cold. You don't want either in your mouth.

 

[thør]

Once I had Jehovah's witnesses knock. I opened the door, the lady I vaguely recognised from the school gate, flustered and said "oh, it's you!", turned around and walked away. They never returned. Clearly I've been joho blacklisted, but I'll be buggered if I know why.

Lucky you.

I was in Japan in summer 2017 and sent the Mormons away from my door using my Ring doorbell.

 

[CandiCame]

Yeah, but according to the Malleus Maleficarum, the Devil's cock is festooned with fishhooks, and his semen is icy cold. You don't want either in your mouth.

You're making a lot of assumptions about a guy who has admitted to sticking electrified urethra stretchers down his dick.

 

[Kirkrapine]

You're making a lot of assumptions about a guy who has admitted to sticking electrified urethra stretchers down his dick.

There's such a thing as electrified urethra stretchers?!

What is the point of them?! It can't be pleasure!

 

[CandiCame]

There's such a thing as electrified urethra stretchers?!

What is the point of them?! It can't be pleasure!

It vibrates from the inside out and shoots pulses of electricity.

You can also use a tens machine or however you spell it on literally any part of your body. A cop's not gonna bust in like, "Don't put that on your nuts!"

You're an adult, live your life.

 

[CandiCame]

If Luci's cum is ice cold then it's literally just Sprite remix. Because sprite remix tastes like cold cum. When that came out I bought one and then ran around to everyone I knew like, "Drink this! Tell me what this tastes like!"

And everyone was like, "Is this carbonate jizz? Did you manufacture this to trick me, somehow?"

And I was like, "no, this is a real product a real company put out for real people to drink."

Also though he'd have to shoot it down my throat or on the right side of my mouth because I genuinely cannot handle ice on that fucked-up tooth right now. That'd be me screaming and punching old hook-dick in the nuts before I caught myself.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

thør, can you hum a few bars?



Hi Jada! My experience tells me that 'happy' can be an unrealistic goal for someone with depression. It may not even be anywhere on their radar. A more reasonable goal might be developing a sense of accomplishment by working within their current abilities.

Appropriate meds and therapy can make a world of difference, over time.

 

[CandiCame]

thør, can you hum a few bars?



Hi Jada! My experience tells me that 'happy' can be an unrealistic goal for someone with depression. It may not even be anywhere on their radar. A more reasonable goal might be developing a sense of accomplishment by working within their current abilities.

Appropriate meds and therapy can make a world of difference, over time.

Every single time I see your icon I think it's Rum Tum Tugger for a second and then it's a human woman and it throws me off real bad. It's some weird optical illusion shit because they're not similar concepts AT ALL.

 

[HAL_9000]

Happiness is a state of mind.

If you were never sad, how could you define happiness?

 

[ryfgirl19]

I think it is. About 10 years ago, I was in a tough spot in my life. I had just graduated college but though my own fault did not get into grad school, and was living back with my parents in my hated hometown while trying to figure out what to do next, working in low-paying temp jobs to make my student loan payments and have some spending money. My peers were going into the jobs they wanted, living in the places they wanted. To top it off, I was in a toxic on-again-off-again with a guy I was convinced was just IT who kept screwing me over. I was in a deep hole of self-pity. I was basically crying myself to sleep every night. One night I decided I had to try to change my mindset because nothing else was working. I started listing off all the things that WERE good about my life, no matter how basic or small-- a roof over my head, running vehicle, loving and patient parents, source of income, my dog, etc. I decided to focus on being grateful for all of that instead of wallowing in my failures. Since making that choice, I have been at least content with things and better able to move forward, more accepting of small victories and slow but sure progress. Things aren't perfect, of course, but I have now managed to build a life I genuinely enjoy, full of love and peace.

 

[dolf]

There's two days each month when PMT kills off all happiness. We've been together for years, but The Ape still doesn't quit trying to make me happy for those two days. It's not a choice, it's not a state of mind, I've just been hit in the face with the hormonal brick of sadness. Fortunately I know exactly what it is and how long it will last. But it's beyond my control.

But the other 26 days is all sunshine and kittens and shit.

 

[Jada59]

There's two days each month when PMT kills off all happiness. We've been together for years, but The Ape still doesn't quit trying to make me happy for those two days. It's not a choice, it's not a state of mind, I've just been hit in the face with the hormonal brick of sadness. Fortunately I know exactly what it is and how long it will last. But it's beyond my control.

But the other 26 days is all sunshine and kittens and shit.

Thankfully I never had that. I had a boss who did but didn't know it. She always complained that her GF had it. I don't know about that but she once stuffed me into the drawer of a file cabinet because she was pissed off about something.

 

[Notcastor]

I want to hear more about this orgasms from hugs deal.

 

[IG_88]

I had the Mormons come looking for my ex wife. Someone must have given her name and figured she needed saving. She does but I think Satan has won that fight.
Anyway, I gave them her address and moved them along.
And they always ask what religion I belong to and no matter what you say they're always "That's ok because our message fits with them all." No it doesn't. I'm a freakin' Methodist. We don't have special underwear and we can drink coffee and booze and not once in 50 years have I ever been told to go knock on someones door and ask if they knew Jesus.
GTFO ya bike riding bitches.

 

[Jada59]

I want to hear more about this orgasms from hugs deal.

I have told this story before. My gardener now lives with me in the back house. At the time the first hugasm occurred, he was just staying in there on a cot,

I had given him massages while he was seated using my hands and/or a cordless electric massager.

One night after dinner, he asked if I could bring the massager back to where he was sleeping and use it on him more. Now at this point I will say that my divorce was not final and my then husband was in the house at the time. Had he not been here, I likely would have gone further. Heck, if the gardener had told me to do more, I'm sure I would have. But I digress.

He remained clothed. Massage from waist up. I did feel his skin under his shirt at his request. I did stroke his hair. Hour long massage. I asked if I could do anything else for him. He told me no. I began to walk out. He hopped up and gave me a special kind of hug,

Stick your arms out, palms up, then bend your elbows and bring your palms towards your body. That's what he did but he sort of hooked his arms under my armpits so his hands were pressing on my upper back and arms were at my lower back. He had our heads on each other's shoulders. He just kept pressing gently but firmly until I felt like we were sharing a body. This went on for at least 5 min. We were both sighing and moaning and I came many times. I kissed his cheek. He kissed my cheek. Then he thanked me and said he was not going to go on his date. He and his GF were on the outs and he'd made a date with someone else but didn't keep it.

Next night was a repeat except for the massage lasted for two hours. I brought a low stool to sit on. More orgasms during the hug but this time he turned his head as I tried to kiss him. I kissed his ear and he immediately pulled away, acting embarrassed.

His GF came back the next night. No more massages but many more prolonged hugs. Almost always I have orgasms and he sounds like he is but the odd thing is I never feel his cock against me.

Since then, the sound of his voice or even looking in his eyes can cause me to orgasm. This has never happened with anyone else. But it sure would be fun to try.

 

[jaF0]

Fuck happy.

 

[IG_88]

Fuck happy.

I used to think that way, too but then I actually allowed myself to be happy and sumbitch if it isn't wonderful. Life is great when you don't let shit bother you.