Just For Shits & Giggles

[Kantarii]

If you had to testify before Congress for any reason, what smart ass remark would you say to them?

Bring on the SARCASM!

Kant

 

[OldJourno]

If you had to testify before Congress, what would be the first thing you’d say?

"I pread the Fifth." My Japanese accent just cracks people up.

 

[Kantarii]

How would you like me to address you before I exercise my freedom of speech and say, “Go fuck yourself?”

 

[LesDesirable]

.....

 

[Biggs_Darklighter]

I'm Batman

 

[Kantarii]

I'm Batman

Really, I pictured you going all Tony Stark: “You want my property; you can’t have it. But I did you a big favor. I successfully privatized world peace.”

 

[CandiCame]

I just don't think there's a lot of good, funny answers for this because of how the question is worded. That's not the first thing Tony Stark said. The first thing Tony Stark said was, "Anthony Edward Stark" because the first thing you say is your name.

And the first thing he said in the scene was, "Really?" in response to the information that Colonel Rhodes would be testifying.

 

[Kantarii]

I just don't think there's a lot of good, funny answers for this because of how the question is worded. That's not the first thing Tony Stark said. The first thing Tony Stark said was, "Anthony Edward Stark" because the first thing you say is your name.

And the first thing he said in the scene was, "Really?" in response to the information that Colonel Rhodes would be testifying.

Give us a funny answer. We aren’t trying to stay within technical guidelines.

 

[InsightRiot]

You're all fucking Fired!

 

[Kantarii]

I didn’t vote for you so don’t talk to me, asshole.

 

[CandiCame]

I would challenge my senator in particular to trial by combat.

I'm decently sure I can whoop his ass.

The senior, not the junior. Rand looks like Napoleon Dynamite, he might have sweet moves that I'm unfamiliar with. But I would challenge Mitch to trial by combat.

We can't use deadly weapons because it'd knock him out of his position (there's literally a clause in the Ky constitution that you can't hold office for the state of Ky if you've engaged in a duel with deadly weapons) so it'd have to be fisticuffs.

Trial by combat has NEVER been abolished since its establishment in 1776 at a federal level, but only like 3 people have asked for it and none of them have gotten it. But I'd go full in, cause a giant scene, and just see what the hell happens.

 

[Kantarii]

Them: Just answer the question.

Me: Bullshit. That’s the same question; y’all just reworded it a hundred times. The answer is still no.

 

[phrodeau]

“What does Congress stand for? Sounds like a sex act. Or is it the opposite of Progress?”

 

[Kantarii]

Hey, I’m giving the answers here - just not to the questions y’all are asking.

 

[Kantarii]

I hate to bust y’all’s bubble, but I didn’t ask to be here so deal with it.

 

[Hal9000_]

Well, now I'm famous...

On Cspan.

 

[Kantarii]

Are y’all gonna give me my full 15 minutes of fame or do I have to beat out of y’all?

 

[GiaCat]

What came first, the shit or the giggle?

 

[SissySalina]

"See all the really poor folk could make it today."

 

[Hal9000_]

What came first, the shit or the giggle?

Giggleshits are a thing.

 

[Kantarii]

*flips them the bird*
I hope there’s an interpreter here

 

[Sean]

George Galloway, who's an arsehole, came up with the best answer ever:

Congress person: How many times have you met Saddam Hussein?

Galloway: Exactly the same number of times as Donald Rumsfeld but I wasn't selling him arms at the time.

 

[Kantarii]

Y’all don’t like me, I don’t like y’all. Can we at least agree on that?

 

[Kantarii]

Now that I’m here, I’ve been meaning to ask y’all what was the last thing y’all passed that wasn’t gas.