Looking for a B-plot...

[Emeraldbeacon]

I'm pouring over ideas for a first submission to the site, and I'm finding that the A-plot (essentially, cramming as much horniness as I can into words) is mostly writing itself. I'm struggling, though, at developing an underlying B-plot to complement the action, and I'm hoping someone here might have some advice or ideas.

The overall story will feature a rather disaffected young man who ends up in a high-stakes challenge with a succubus... if he wins, he gains her sexual potency, charm, stamina, etc. If he loses, his body dies and his soul becomes forfeit. The specific terms of the battle are fairly simple; what I'm trying to find out is, why is he willing to take the risk? What is he willing to put on the line (job, family, relationships) for this? And while there doesn't need to be much of a reason "why" a demoness is doing something, it'd be nice to understand her purpose, too.

My current thoughts are that he doesn't have much family, maybe very few friends (none of them really close), works a dead end job and got passed over for promotion (what does he do for a living?). Disappearing wouldn't matter much to the world, in his eyes. As for her... maybe she's good at what she does, but bored, and is taking a risk for the thrill of it...

Anyway, I'm bouncing around some scenes I think might be hot, but stringing them together is the tough part.

 

[Aussieguy8]

From what I read the easiest b plot for him would be one of jealousy. Perhaps there is a very one way rivalry with someone else at work. The person who got the promotion. There is gossip about how good he is in bed and perhaps even suspisions that he is sleeping with the attractive boss in order to get the promotion. I wouldn't go full incel mindset as incels don't make characters people root for (hehe), but its your story and your protag. But its the motivation that he will always be living a half life so why not risk it all.

The succubus is all about reinforcing that mindset, that is that charm and being a good oarsman get's you everywhere. Perhaps with a bit of a question about how much the succubus believes that or are they just using honeyed words to get a soul. Or a mix of both most likely.

He is willing to bet his life and his soul over this. She is willing to accept that bet because his life is one of unrequited lust. She can use that unrequited lust to manipulate the next person into a similar deal. As such the bet is win/ win for her.

 

[AlinaX]

In the hierarchy of demonkind, one advances by corrupting souls, and to take a soul through a deal is an extraordinary win, worth a risk.

And @Aussieguy8 has a good point. Perhaps our hero is severely lacking the charisma needed to get a girl and to get ahead at work. Perhaps, however, he has a younger sister he cares for. The car crash that claimed their parents’ lives also claimed her legs and left her with burn scars.

Life is a struggle financially and he’s under threat of redundancy. Along comes a succubus who says, “I can give you the power to charm colleagues and women…”

 

[TheWritingGroup]

Could be very straightforward jealousy. Your guy is in love with (or at least, crushing on) a specific woman who has no (visible) interest in him. With demonic attractiveness, he can take her away from his hated rival.

His character growth is coming to realize that using mind control to enslave someone is actually, well, demonic. Utterly evil. Succubi are monsters, not happy, sexy temptresses.

The demon is, of course, motivated by the desire to destroy a person and condemn him to torment, just because she hates his still being redeemable. She isn't.

 

[Dwbackup2023]

Maybe he's akward and kind of on the small side, but if he wins the succubus has the ability to change his body as well as the stuff you listed. Think captain America in the marvel movies.

What game are they going to play? Maybe the succubus losses on purpose because she gains power through her proximity to corruption and lust. This makes the MC a unknowing servent to the succubus by corrupting others to tap into their essence.

 

[Rob_Royale]

I think your MMC was bullied. A lot.
There are two types of people who have that sort of past. The one who gets over it and moves on and has a decent life. The second is someone who let's it destroy his entire self image/esteem. Your character is the latter. That sort of person will do anything for revenge or redemption. As such, they are easy pickings for a demoness and he's just dripping with angst. A smorgasbord of anger and disappointment and lust.

 

[LupusDei]

The most obvious and expected guy has alredy been sketched out:
- basically a loser,
- has character deficiencies,
- likely has a crush on a woman he perceives as unreachable,
- on the verge of giving up ambition for a future of eternal resentment (possibly up to and including suicidal ideation),
--> he perceive the deal with the demon as low risk and high gain, an escape hatch.

What he does? Perhaps some position actively replaced by AI, or under immediate threat of. He's not very good at it, and not good at adapting, and he knows that.

The succubus...? Obviously, She *NEEDS* that soul. Could be there's something special with this one in particular, but could as well be that she's just in a middle of some kind of hellish problem herself. Doesn't need to be explained, she likely wouldn't, but could be hinted at or implied.

What exactly happens if she loses?
Does she become mortal?
Is banished from existence?
Continue in diminished capacity but with potential to recover?
Actually gets control or influence over the guy anyway?
Becomes the guy's slave?
Something else entirely?

Depending on the combination of possible outcomes (and outcomes believed beforehand aren't necessarily be the actual outcomes) she may perceive the risk as anything from negligible or even win-win, to extreme and existential.

Who approached whom?
Did the succubus scout an easy mark?
Did the guy try his hand in summoning out of desperation? If so, the succubus may be in a bind from the beginning (possibly, even likely unknowingly to he guy) and the deal be her chess move to break free.

 

[Dwbackup2023]

I agree with Rob it would make since if the MC was bullied or had some other grudge against certain people. That would give him a wide range of people he feels slighted by. The list could range from the bullies, the bullies families or girlfriends/wives or even teachers that didnt protect him. When he feels all is lost and he will never be able to move past it a voice will whisper from the shadows promising him everything he needs for revenge.

Maybe for some reason the demon can be in a weakened state. Like it was sealed in a small statue or jewelry and hasn't been around people to feed off of in a long time. MC has a grandfather that found the statue/jewelry on a archeological dig. The demon started to wake up feeding of the lustful thoughts of people around it, but before she gets enough power to take a physical form the grandfather takes all his finding back to his cabin in a remote area. He travels alot so again she is separated from people, till the grandfather dies leading to the MC going to the cabin and finding the statue.

She can feed on lustful thoughts and energy, but can gain more power through corruption and depravity of people around her. The more she consumes the more abilities she can give to the MC, but those come at a cost...

 

[LupusDei]

The guy doesn't need to be a loser though.

Especially if he finds out a bound, trapped or otherwise weakened succubus by accident (or fate).

Nor needs he be a loser if it is the succubus who's sought him out as a challenge or for something special the guy possess (probably unknowingly).

 

[LupusDei]

Over thirty years ago, after his freshman year in college John spent summer holidays at his grandparent's farm and laid his eyes on a neighbor girl skinny dipping in the secluded river... Rebecca didn't seem too upset when she caught him peeping, but when he approached her a little bit too eager in his youthful excitement despite having a girlfriend back in the city, she rejected him, knowing or sensing. And not just rejected, being witchcraft apprentice at the ages old witch living nearby, the angered girl laid a curse on him: no matter what, no woman will find him desirable.

He laughed it off, at first... while inexperienced, he hadn't been without female attention. Yet the following winter proved it had been no joke, his girlfriend left with a guy seemingly inferior in any way, and he found himself unable to start any new relationship. He told himself he simply doesn't have time to commit, dismissing his failures at random girls as bad luck. Eventually he stopped trying, but wasn't too upset chasing excellence and career. Bright, capable and committed workaholic he held several and diverse good jobs and built a small business.

He was there to help when his sister and her husband were in difficulties with small children he helped to raise. Distance work enabled him to move out to the old farm. It became a family hub everyone visited for holidays and it was a good place to take care of his aging parents.

Outwardly he was successful and respected, well regarded by peers and family. Inwardly, he never found fulfillment, and gradually withdraw from public life. What's the point to attend parties if he found himself being a passive observer more often than not? What's the joy of concerts, opera or theater if you're effectively going alone, even in a company? Friends, the few he had, married, raised children and moved on. Sister moved to a good job in a different city, nieces flew out to distant colleges. He sold his business and reduced his work to consulting and contracts fulfilled at distance, to care for his father bedridden for past several years, instead taking on hobby beekeeping and carpentry.

When dad finally fall in eternal sleep, and the commotion with funeral was over, and everyone visiting has gone back to their own distant life, John, now fifty next year, found himself a recluse in an empty once upon a time farmhouse mansion with a six acre garden, a handful beehives and a dog, spending 20 hours a week moving grass...

Late one summer night he went for a swim in the river. A splash upstream wasn't from a duck nor a beaver, through the moonlight filled mist he saw a female form in that same old place under the giant elm, never visited by anybody since...

 

[anthrodisiac]

Not-so-cool dude finds succubus, risks everything for power is pretty straight-forward, as you've gotten so far. Let's see if we can't shake this up a bit.

1. Guy is kinda bored at work, on a lark, buys some dumb magic book or whatever. He's not really sure how it showed up on his screen, but the deal is pretty good, and it has a lot of good reviews that all say how amazing it is at stuff. He doesn't really believe it, it's more of a gag gift, so he gets it. It shows up before he gets home. Weird. Opens it, checks it out. The words don't make sense, so he tries reading them out loud to see if hearing them might shake something loose. Oops, bad move, dude. Succubus shows up, offers him the deal. Now, he wants no part of it, but by speaking the words, he's already entered into the agreement. "Not my fault you can't read Inferni"-type deal.

2. A succubus somehow found this guy and does everything she can to get into this bet with him for whatever reason. Maybe she's responsible for his life going downhill lately, and eveything is just falling apart, he feels he's at the end of his rope and has nothing to lose. So he started out with everything, but it's just all imploding the last few months because of this succubus. Maybe she thinks he's cute and wants him for herself, or his family fucked him over many, many years ago, or she still owes his family something and is trying to repay the debt somehow.

3. He's a loser, and she feels sorry for him and orchestrates everything because she wants to help. She knows she's supposed to collect souls, but she's kind of a sap who keeps getting in trouble for "losing" these things on purpose, but she just really likes humans, they're kinda nice and sweet in the way her bosses or whoever aren't.

 

[liliput1]

I think your MMC was bullied. A lot.
There are two types of people who have that sort of past. The one who gets over it and moves on and has a decent life. The second is someone who let's it destroy his entire self image/esteem. Your character is the latter. That sort of person will do anything for revenge or redemption. As such, they are easy pickings for a demoness and he's just dripping with angst. A smorgasbord of anger and disappointment and lust.

Some acquire an overdeveloped sense of justice. So another option that riffs on @anthrodisiac 's farther down is she starts using him to find dirtbags who nobody will miss all that much. Not unlike when Lestat swears off eating innocent people and just goes after horrible ones.