Married People: is your spouse still sexy to you?

[LizVegas79]

I still find hub's sexy AF (and so do lots of other women too, which often works out for me too since I'm bi and we like to play).

But since his mom died earlier this year, our sex life has gone to hell. I'm hopeful it will improve soon. (IT BETTER,! ) He probably just needs a smoking hot blonde model-type or sultry Asian gymnast to snap him out of his funk. (for the record, either of those remedies would probably improve my mood too lol) A little b12 might help too lol.

We celebrated (sort of) our 15th wedding anniversary earlier this year.

 

[JennyCapricorn]

I still find hub's sexy AF (and so do lots of other women too, which often works out for me too lots of times lol).

But since his mom died earlier this year, our sex life has gone to hell. I'm hopeful it will improve soon. (IT BETTER,! ) He probably just needs a smoking hot blonde model-type or sultry Asian gymnast to snap him out of his funk. (for the record, either of those remedies would probably improve my mood too lol) A little b12 might help too lol.

We celebrated (sort of) our 15th wedding anniversary earlier this year.

Here’s hoping he finds what he needs to snap himself back into you with the proper energy.

 

[LatinaSoCal1995]

I still find hub's sexy AF (and so do lots of other women too, which often works out for me too since I'm bi and we like to play).

But since his mom died earlier this year, our sex life has gone to hell. I'm hopeful it will improve soon. (IT BETTER,! ) He probably just needs a smoking hot blonde model-type or sultry Asian gymnast to snap him out of his funk. (for the record, either of those remedies would probably improve my mood too lol) A little b12 might help too lol.

We celebrated (sort of) our 15th wedding anniversary earlier this year.

Hey, every year is a victory when both partners are working on it.

 

[LizVegas79]

Hey, every year is a victory when both partners are working on it.

So true. We are very fortunate to have each other.

And, fortunately, we have an "understanding" that I have certain freedoms involving other women which he does not.

 

[Tallulah82]

I still find hub's sexy AF (and so do lots of other women too, which often works out for me too since I'm bi and we like to play).

But since his mom died earlier this year, our sex life has gone to hell. I'm hopeful it will improve soon. (IT BETTER,! ) He probably just needs a smoking hot blonde model-type or sultry Asian gymnast to snap him out of his funk. (for the record, either of those remedies would probably improve my mood too lol) A little b12 might help too lol.

We celebrated (sort of) our 15th wedding anniversary earlier this year.

Ironically, when my MIL passed away earlier this year, our sex life has been revived from stuttering around for a time (long story). Over the years, for us, we've had, and still have, ebbs and flows due to real life demands, but we now acknowledge them and keep checking in with each other that the ebb isn't hiding a bigger problem.

Side note: he walked the Camino de Santiago during the summer and kept sending me selfies. Most of them held a *phwoar*ness for me, seeing him in his walking gear and sporting his rugged beard.

 

[LatinaSoCal1995]

So true. We are very fortunate to have each other.

And, fortunately, we have an "understanding" that I have certain freedoms involving other women which he does not.

Goals.

Recently divorced here but for reasons beyond my fucking understanding TBH.

Maybe one day.

 

[LizVegas79]

Ironically, when my MIL passed away earlier this year, our sex life has been revived from stuttering around for a time (long story). Over the years, for us, we've had, and still have, ebbs and flows due to real life demands, but we now acknowledge them and keep checking in with each other that the ebb isn't hiding a bigger problem.

Side note: he walked the Camino de Santiago during the summer and kept sending me selfies. Most of them held a *phwoar*ness for me, seeing him in his walking gear and sporting his rugged beard.

Yeah, keeping those lines of communication open - especially in challenging times - is the most important thing.

Thanks for the reminder!

(and the idea to encourage him to go on a long hike somewhere so that I have our house to myself for a few weeks for some much needed GIRL TIME! )

Goals.

Recently divorced here but for reasons beyond my fucking understanding TBH.

Maybe one day.

I'm so sorry.

But just remember, in a world of infinite possibilities anything is possible. My advice: Dream BIG!!!

 

[LatinaSoCal1995]

Yeah, keeping those lines of communication open - especially in challenging times - is the most important thing.

Thanks for the reminder!

(and the idea to encourage him to go on a long hike somewhere so that I have our house to myself for a few weeks for some much needed GIRL TIME! )




I'm so sorry.

But just remember, in a world of infinite possibilities anything is possible. My advice: Dream BIG!!!

No lie, he fucking shattered who I thought I was or would be. Therapy is doing its thing for sure.

Dreams? Chica, that's all I fucking got for now. Hope? Not so much.

 

[LizVegas79]

No lie, he fucking shattered who I thought I was or would be. Therapy is doing its thing for sure.

Dreams? Chica, that's all I fucking got for now. Hope? Not so much.

Oh I'm so sorry. How did he get so much power over who you are?

If you don't mind me asking, did you surrender it to him, or did he steal who you are deep down little by little?

I've seen mind games wreck so many marriages. Sometimes we don't even know someone else is playing them until it's too late.

I know it probably sounds woo-woo, but try to find your center, that little girl inside who was optimistic, or at least bold, about the future and glad to be growing up. She's in there. Find her and let her come out into the open again.

 

[JackKingOff]

Yes, but sexy is more than just physical appearance and I am in a situation where i am physically attracted but turned off by the person she is choosing to be now.

 

[lacandy]

Yes, but sexy is more than just physical appearance and I am in a situation where i am physically attracted but turned off by the person she is choosing to be now.

Yes! Maybe we all have a different opinion of “sexy”? Because I count it as more than just wanting to have sex - God knows I WANT to have sex with almost anyone at this point…but that connection between my brain and my body isn’t happening with the husband (and hasn’t been for a long time now - this me being here).

 

[LatinaSoCal1995]

Oh I'm so sorry. How did he get so much power over who you are?

If you don't mind me asking, did you surrender it to him, or did he steal who you are deep down little by little?

I've seen mind games wreck so many marriages. Sometimes we don't even know someone else is playing them until it's too late.

I know it probably sounds woo-woo, but try to find your center, that little girl inside who was optimistic, or at least bold, about the future and glad to be growing up. She's in there. Find her and let her come out into the open again.

Long story short, I was in an accident when I was much younger and now I can't have kids. He knew that from the get go. Talked about adopting and all that, then finds a bitch that wants kids. Bye bye marriage.

 

[LizVegas79]

Long story short, I was in an accident when I was much younger and now I can't have kids. He knew that from the get go. Talked about adopting and all that, then finds a bitch that wants kids. Bye bye marriage.

What a fucking asshole.

Well sweetie, don't let the fact that you can't have kids ruin your opinion of yourself. That's his bullshit. It doesn't have to be yours.

You are still awesome and amazing AND beautiful!!!

Look at it this way, you are now free from his narrow minded worldview and you can do anything you want. You can meet the man of your dreams today, tomorrow, next week or next year. There's no rush. And if it's meant to be and you BOTH want to adopt down the road then cross that bridge then, not now. Heck, he might already have kids from his first messed up marriage that you fall in love with and they you.

BELIEVE IN ALL YOUR CHERISHED DREAMS! THEY ARE POSSIBLE!!!

 

[LatinaSoCal1995]

What a fucking asshole.

Well sweetie, don't let the fact that you can't have kids ruin your opinion of yourself. That's his bullshit. It doesn't have to be yours.

You are still awesome and amazing AND beautiful!!!

Look at it this way, you are now free from his narrow minded worldview and you can do anything you want. You can meet the man of your dreams today, tomorrow, next week or next year. There's no rush. And if it's meant to be and you BOTH want to adopt down the road then cross that bridge then, not now. Heck, he might already have kids from his first messed up marriage that you fall in love with and they you.

BELIEVE IN ALL YOUR CHERISHED DREAMS! THEY ARE POSSIBLE!!!

This. Fucking this.

I hear this from one other person in my life and it keeps me going.

For now, I'm learning myself all over again. I know what I like, what I don't, and always ready to learn.

I got more here on Lit than therapy I swear. Hahaha

 

[JennyCapricorn]

I got more here on Lit than therapy I swear. Hahaha

Sorority of the Sexually Kinky.

 

[LustfulIntentions2]

What a fucking asshole.

Well sweetie, don't let the fact that you can't have kids ruin your opinion of yourself. That's his bullshit. It doesn't have to be yours.

You are still awesome and amazing AND beautiful!!!

Look at it this way, you are now free from his narrow minded worldview and you can do anything you want. You can meet the man of your dreams today, tomorrow, next week or next year. There's no rush. And if it's meant to be and you BOTH want to adopt down the road then cross that bridge then, not now. Heck, he might already have kids from his first messed up marriage that you fall in love with and they you.

BELIEVE IN ALL YOUR CHERISHED DREAMS! THEY ARE POSSIBLE!!!

@LatinaSoCal1995 What Liz fucking said.

 

[JackKingOff]

Sorority of the Sexually Kinky.

There are a lot of men here who are in similar shoes. Just saying does it have to be an exclusive sorority?

 

[LizVegas79]

There are a lot of men here who are in similar shoes. Just saying does it have to be an exclusive sorority?

No. It's just more interesting because we're better at sharing our true feelings that's all

 

[JackKingOff]

No. It's just more interesting because we're better at sharing our true feelings that's all

You got me there!

 

[JennyCapricorn]

Anyone else care to share?

 

[hulmule]

i'm attracted to my wife to this day... But menopause just took away her desires. Love feeling her next to me, i hear " Having a hot flash dont touch me.. Crazy how much it still hits her and been years

 

[JennyCapricorn]

i'm attracted to my wife to this day... But menopause just took away her desires. Love feeling her next to me, i hear " Having a hot flash dont touch me.. Crazy how much it still hits her and been years

As a hot flash sufferer I feel for you both. I start the night under 5 layers and then hubby is buried under 9 and I’m a goddamn furnace.

Has your wife looked into hormone patches?

 

[hulmule]

As a hot flash sufferer I feel for you both. I start the night under 5 layers and then hubby is buried under 9 and I’m a goddamn furnace.

Has your wife looked into hormone patches?

Sent you a pm hope its ok

 

[Somethingnew1124]

Oh most definitely.

 

[WhiteKinkyCuck]

yes, I am still very much attracted to her. can't get enough of her. more so now than ever before.