Mate Poaching

[cloudy]

C'est la vie.

Indeed.

I've always been attracted to dark guys: dark hair, dark eyes, brown skin. My SO is pretty much exactly what most people picture when someone says "native american." Is that just what I've always been accustomed to, or is it my genetics? A combination of both?

I can't say.

 

[yevkassem72]

Indeed.

I've always been attracted to dark guys: dark hair, dark eyes, brown skin. My SO is pretty much exactly what most people picture when someone says "native american." Is that just what I've always been accustomed to, or is it my genetics? A combination of both?

I can't say.

And I'm attracted to both the dark and the fair.....must be my mixed ancestry at war with itself. LOL.

 

[cloudy]

And I'm attracted to both the dark and the fair.....must be my mixed ancestry at war with itself. LOL.

It's odd, thinking about it, though.

Traditional psychology holds that a large percentage of straight women look for a man with traits in common with their father.

My father, however, was caucasion (the native is on my mother's side), and most resembled a viking, if I had to name an ethnic "type." He was 6' 5", very blond, pale blue eyes, and fair-complected.

I wasn't raised on a reserve.

Odd, indeed.

 

[yevkassem72]

It's odd, thinking about it, though.

Traditional psychology holds that a large percentage of straight women look for a man with traits in common with their father.

My father, however, was caucasion (the native is on my mother's side), and most resembled a viking, if I had to name an ethnic "type." He was 6' 5", very blond, pale blue eyes, and fair-complected.

I wasn't raised on a reserve.

Odd, indeed.

If life had no mysteries, we would have nothing to seek.

 

[CeriseNoire]

It's odd, thinking about it, though.

Traditional psychology holds that a large percentage of straight women look for a man with traits in common with their father.

My father, however, was caucasion (the native is on my mother's side), and most resembled a viking, if I had to name an ethnic "type." He was 6' 5", very blond, pale blue eyes, and fair-complected.

I wasn't raised on a reserve.

Odd, indeed.

I wonder if maybe somewhere in evolution, we've moved from looking for similar physical traits, to looking for common personality traits.

 

[MagicaPractica]

I admit to having been tempted but have stopped far outside the line of poaching. Of course, if he ever gets divorced, I would seriously like to be first in line. For whatever reason, Catholic upbringing etc., I would not be happy with myself if I poached so I'm not putting myself through that.

 

[cloudy]

I wonder if maybe somewhere in evolution, we've moved from looking for similar physical traits, to looking for common personality traits.

Quite possibly.

But then, K isn't much like my father. I could probably come up with a few small things if I really thought about it, I guess, but on the surface? No.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I admit to having been tempted but have stopped far outside the line of poaching. Of course, if he ever gets divorced, I would seriously like to be first in line. For whatever reason, Catholic upbringing etc., I would not be happy with myself if I poached so I'm not putting myself through that.

I've been waiting for someone to get dumped to make a move. But no, I haven't gone poaching.

 

[cloudy]

I admit to having been tempted but have stopped far outside the line of poaching. Of course, if he ever gets divorced, I would seriously like to be first in line. For whatever reason, Catholic upbringing etc., I would not be happy with myself if I poached so I'm not putting myself through that.

One thing that's always stopped me from literally poaching is the thought that if he'll cheat on her, he'll cheat on me.

My situation, as I said, was a little different. We were friends first - I was even friends with her. There was always that bit of sexual tension between us, we just never acted on it until she was gone.

 

[MagicaPractica]

One thing that's always stopped me from literally poaching is the thought that if he'll cheat on her, he'll cheat on me.

My situation, as I said, was a little different. We were friends first - I was even friends with her. There was always that bit of sexual tension between us, we just never acted on it until she was gone.

That's very true too, certainly been said to many a woman. I wanted to be friends with him even though I knew we couldn't be more, but I just couldn't do it. Hurt too much. Had to walk away.

 

[MagicaPractica]

I've been waiting for someone to get dumped to make a move. But no, I haven't gone poaching.

Waiting for that damsel in distress or would you prefer her to be a little over him? Personally, I'd like to meet him again after he was over her.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

Waiting for that damsel in distress or would you prefer her to be a little over him? Personally, I'd like to meet him again after he was over her.

I'll take anything that's willing (and attractive) at this point...

 

[cloudy]

That's very true too, certainly been said to many a woman. I wanted to be friends with him even though I knew we couldn't be more, but I just couldn't do it. Hurt too much. Had to walk away.

It IS hard. At one point, K and I stopped communicating at all for about a year. It was just too hard for both of us to be friends without anything else. I think we both knew that eventually we'd be together, but neither one of us did anything. She left on her own.

From talking with both of them (as I said, she and I were friends as well), their relationship hadn't been a good one for years before I even knew he existed. I didn't bring about their breakup, but I certainly took advantage of it when it happened.

 

[SimpleGifts]

One thing that's always stopped me from literally poaching is the thought that if he'll cheat on her, he'll cheat on me.

I have to say, that's a sentiment that I think is a fallacy. I know more than a few people who have "cheated" on their SOs...and a good deal of the "cheating" is situational. As someone else said, most people 'poach' or are 'poached' because they are dissatisfied with their relationship somehow. If put into a different relationship, there is no basis to assume that they are automatically going to be unfaithful. Some may, as there ARE serial philanderers and people who lie for the sake of it, who are sex addicts, etc....but I don't believe that anyone who cheats once will automatically do it again in their next relationship.

If you believe that, then you might as well believe that all criminals are recidivists and therefore incarceration is virtually pointless.

SG

 

[mismused]

delete

 

[cloudy]

I have to say, that's a sentiment that I think is a fallacy. I know more than a few people who have "cheated" on their SOs...and a good deal of the "cheating" is situational. As someone else said, most people 'poach' or are 'poached' because they are dissatisfied with their relationship somehow. If put into a different relationship, there is no basis to assume that they are automatically going to be unfaithful. Some may, as there ARE serial philanderers and people who lie for the sake of it, who are sex addicts, etc....but I don't believe that anyone who cheats once will automatically do it again in their next relationship.

If you believe that, then you might as well believe that all criminals are recidivists and therefore incarceration is virtually pointless.

SG

You're welcome to your opinion, of course, but I've found/seen it to be mostly true. It's not automatic, no (I'm not stupid), but those who have found it easy to cheat before, will likely find it easy to cheat again.

You seem to have taken my statement a bit personally. Guilty conscience, perhaps?

Your analogy in the last line is comparing apples and oranges. One has absolutely nothing to do with the other.

 

[Vermilion]

It's odd, thinking about it, though.

Traditional psychology holds that a large percentage of straight women look for a man with traits in common with their father.

My father, however, was caucasion (the native is on my mother's side), and most resembled a viking, if I had to name an ethnic "type." He was 6' 5", very blond, pale blue eyes, and fair-complected.

I wasn't raised on a reserve.

Odd, indeed.

I, on the other hand, am going out with a man who looks very like you describe your father, whilst my father has black hair (even now, aged 60) olive skin and dark brown eyes. Maybe our tastes got muddled...
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[Guest]

I, on the other hand, am going out with a man who looks very like you describe your father, whilst my father has black hair (even now, aged 60) olive skin and dark brown eyes. Maybe our tastes got muddled...
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*grin*

lucky looks nothing like my father.

 

[cloudy]

*grin*

lucky looks nothing like my father.

. .

 

[Remec]

*grin*

lucky looks nothing like my father.

hehehe
But how does she match up with your mother?

 

[Vermilion]

*grin*

lucky looks nothing like my father.

Y'know what - I'm kinda glad to hear that... for Lucky's sake if nothing else
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[Guest]

I, on the other hand, am going out with a man who looks very like you describe your father.
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Cloudy, meet your new mother.

 

[cloudy]

Cloudy, meet your new mother.

My mom will be so disappointed.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Cloudy, meet your new mother.

If you're talking about that blond in your av, Ted- i had no idea a Gelfling could be so fuckable!

 

[Vermilion]

<is freaked out by the bizarreness of the conversation>
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