No secret about it, I hope you come on top,
Always believed you would come through.
I apparently need to choose my words better in the future. I’m unsure why these upset me as much as they do. I know they were meant playfully and in jest... perhaps it is because in my post I was aiming for sincerity and these replies make me think I was completely off mark.
Thank you, sweet Todger
Are you who I want to be?
Do you walk in the rain,
Feeling the soak of it
Every drop that falls creating a pattern of darkness,
Like unpaid polkadots set upon fabrics
Until they sink together and become something else
That overtakes all reasoning
On a morning when reason wasn’t paid for?
Are you who I want to be?
Do you tie yourself
Over and over
So tight that the tears stop for a few moments
And the world feels manageable
Even though it still burns down upon you
Like the heat of suns where no screen will stop a sear,
But for now,
In those precious moments
When his hands held you wrapped like that,
You allowed yourself free
The way you do each time you try again
To find that feeling
In the lengths of rope?
Are you who I want to be?
Did you dress like a tease
On a Wednesday night
For a spin and song
Where everyone looks,
But knows you’re not simple in any way
And especially not that one,
So look, but don’t think too hard
About the tight dress you want to rip off
With someone who will appreciate the stockings,
Garter,
Your hair,
The way you smell,
The way you taste,
The way you feel
Pressing your hips against theirs at such a distance
That, as you wait, the steam rises from your skin
Into the empty car of your voices?
Are you who I want to be?
Someone recognizable, and yet not -
A face changed by time and a body altered as well
By a child and wear unseen before
Yet wanted all the same
In each hidden pain lies a story shared or kept
And with each line of verse
Another slice offered like it doesn’t hack away,
Show upon your face
With hope?
Am I who I want to be?
Are you who I want to be?
Do you walk in the rain,
Feeling the soak of it
Every drop that falls creating a pattern of darkness,
Like unpaid polkadots set upon fabrics
Until they sink together and become something else
That overtakes all reasoning
On a morning when reason wasn’t paid for?
Are you who I want to be?
Do you tie yourself
Over and over
So tight that the tears stop for a few moments
And the world feels manageable
Even though it still burns down upon you
Like the heat of suns where no screen will stop a sear,
But for now,
In those precious moments
When his hands held you wrapped like that,
You allowed yourself free
The way you do each time you try again
To find that feeling
In the lengths of rope?
Are you who I want to be?
Did you dress like a tease
On a Wednesday night
For a spin and song
Where everyone looks,
But knows you’re not simple in any way
And especially not that one,
So look, but don’t think too hard
About the tight dress you want to rip off
With someone who will appreciate the stockings,
Garter,
Your hair,
The way you smell,
The way you taste,
The way you feel
Pressing your hips against theirs at such a distance
That, as you wait, the steam rises from your skin
Into the empty car of your voices?
Are you who I want to be?
Someone recognizable, and yet not -
A face changed by time and a body altered as well
By a child and wear unseen before
Yet wanted all the same
In each hidden pain lies a story shared or kept
And with each line of verse
Another slice offered like it doesn’t hack away,
Show upon your face
With hope?
Am I who I want to be?
Are you who I want to be?
Do you walk in the rain,
Feeling the soak of it
Every drop that falls creating a pattern of darkness,
Like unpaid polkadots set upon fabrics
Until they sink together and become something else
That overtakes all reasoning
On a morning when reason wasn’t paid for?
Are you who I want to be?
Do you tie yourself
Over and over
So tight that the tears stop for a few moments
And the world feels manageable
Even though it still burns down upon you
Like the heat of suns where no screen will stop a sear,
But for now,
In those precious moments
When his hands held you wrapped like that,
You allowed yourself free
The way you do each time you try again
To find that feeling
In the lengths of rope?
Are you who I want to be?
Did you dress like a tease
On a Wednesday night
For a spin and song
Where everyone looks,
But knows you’re not simple in any way
And especially not that one,
So look, but don’t think too hard
About the tight dress you want to rip off
With someone who will appreciate the stockings,
Garter,
Your hair,
The way you smell,
The way you taste,
The way you feel
Pressing your hips against theirs at such a distance
That, as you wait, the steam rises from your skin
Into the empty car of your voices?
Are you who I want to be?
Someone recognizable, and yet not -
A face changed by time and a body altered as well
By a child and wear unseen before
Yet wanted all the same
In each hidden pain lies a story shared or kept
And with each line of verse
Another slice offered like it doesn’t hack away,
Show upon your face
With hope?
Am I who I want to be?
I don't always react, but I'm always looking forward to your 'meandering missives' and the accompanying pictures. This is a great one.
Are we who we want to be or are we rather who we actually end up becoming?
And is who we become more adaptive as are our minds?
But I did read your words...slowly. And I did gaze at your photographic artwork in wonderment.
This is fucking beautiful!
Thank you for... all of it.Lovely ropework
The image is a creative reflection of the words, and both are gorgeous. I am also impressed with...and a bit envious of...your photo editing skills.
I accidentally made it incredibly easy on myself and just split the picture down the door jam. It made for an easy line and I didn’t have to deal with any lighting changes. The most difficult part was finding a pose that felt right and was simple enough to duplicate both in just rope and clothed... the outtakes are a bit everywhere. Thank you, as always, Lovely friend.
This year...
I’m going to attempt to be more comfortable with my body.
I’m going to learn to say “no” more when necessary, and “yes” when I need to.
I’m going to keep my health at the forefront.
Im going to allow myself to feel things, but not allow those feelings to cloud any decisions.
I’m going to be better about being present in the moments that matter.
I’m going to write about everything I want to.
I’m going to attempt more positivity.
I’m going to self-tie weekly.
I’m going to be a person others can turn to for support.
I’m going to thank the people who matter more often.
This year...
I’m not going to let the things others do define how I feel.
I’m not going to back down when I know I’m right.
I’m not going to stop reaching for the things I want, need.
I’m not going to be a door mat.
I’m not going to eat as much garbage... but maybe more popcorn.
I’m not going to give up anything I need for someone else.
I’m not going to complain unless I know change is possible.
This year has to be better than the last...
...right?
*Side note: Manni and I are having a sleepover party for the new year! If you’re reading this, I wanna know what your jammies look like! Either reply with a description, or, if you’re brave, show us!
