Drobabes
Sweet'n'Sour
- Joined
- Mar 7, 2015
- Posts
- 9,530
"I could have lied to you and told you that it was all fake, that the General was twisting your view of me but I didn't because..."
Delvin's eyes had been lingering on the recorder once again, as he became torn on what to do. The slightly buzzed part of his mind wanted to 'continue' their conversation, but fearful, guilty part of his brain acknowledged that they needed to look at that damn player. The choice was soon made for him, however, as what Damien had to say drew forth another look of shock.
It was true. He could have lied. Infact, it would have been so damn easy for him to lie in that moment that it could have been years before Vin ever found out the truth, possibly never even knowing. But...he hadn't.
"...but she told me that it's not up to me whether I deserve her or not, and that she'll make that decision herself."
Vin ran a hand through his hair nervously, looking away from the man on the ground as his brain tried to make sense of all these new moral dilemmas while it simultaneously tried to stall the inevitable. He had such an urge to shoot his foot out and kick that recorder away, that it almost overtook him and won out, only to be denied at the last second when Damien picked it up. He wanted to tell him to stop, to not the play the sick fucks games, but it was too late, the audio was already going and her screams of pain reverberated through him and shook him just as badly as it did Damien.
Over the course of the next five minutes, as it didn't seem to be a very long video, (though his perception of time could have argued otherwise), Vin stood there in shock and disgust. Every second that passed was more difficult to bear than the last, and by the time it was finally over, he had one hand on his hip and the other covering his mouth, his eyes wide and wet as he looked away and tried not to gag. He had known that Kuznet was evil, truly evil, but he had yet to witness it firsthand. Until now...with their sweet, innocent friend who didn't deserve such cruelty.
The recorder falling to the ground made him flinch, his mind still reeling and on high alert from the stress of what they had both been witness to. Yes, both of them. Damien had done some evil shit, there was no getting around that fact, but as Vin looked down at him and stared, something in his moral compass finally pointed true. For right now, in this moment, he wasn't a rapist in Vin's eyes. He was just a broken man with a dirty past, and who was being unnecessarily and cruelly tortured; completely inhumane.
And maybe it was because of this, or maybe it was because Delvin was feeling just as lost and hopeless, that he found himself taking his hand away from his face and moving his guitar off his shoulder. He let it slide to the ground, slowly and gently, and then he took the short step over to Damien's side and slid down against the car next to him, his legs splaying out over the hard, dry, dirt and almost touching his own. He brought his hands in his lap and stared ahead blankly, not knowing what to say for a moment. When he did finally start to speak, it was slowly, and hesitantly, as if he were scared of saying each word.
"Our dad was a piece of shit to me and my sister, and my mother. He never got the chance to hit us, but, we grew up with a lot of violence in that house. It got to be such a regular occurrence that I got used to it. Thought it was normal, even, that most people just have shitty parents growing up and that's just how life was. It's not, or, it shouldn't have been, and I didn't realize how it was effecting us until I almost killed someone. My best friend at the time."
His brown eyes glanced over at Damien before quickly looking away as a few tears spilled over and ran down through the scruff on his face. He hadn't talked with anyone about this in years, and he was finding it difficult. Nonetheless, he continued on.
"I was fifteen and was making a lot of mistakes. Pick anything off the list of 'bad for you', and I was probably doing it, short of heroine. I was violent, and wild, and damn near out of control. And I... and I had a baby on the way. That's what...started it..."
His throat gets too tight for him to continue for a moment, and he has to clear it several times before going on.
"The mother came to me crying, bawling. I mean, absolute mess. It took me forever to get her to calm down enough and tell me what happened. She said that he raped her-my friend, and threatened to kill me if she said anything. Well, needless to say, I flew into a rage. I went straight over to his house and kicked in his door; didn't even give him a chance to say a word before I was on him. I was...a lot bigger than him, so he didn't really have a chance...
"His parents found him that evening. Bleeding, unconscious. I didn't know he was still alive, I..."
He has to stop again, the tremor in his voice making it difficult to speak. After running his fingers through his hair to push it back and swallowing, he finally continues.
"I had every intention of leaving him for dead. Thought I did, even. I didn't think he deserved to live after what he'd done. Well anyway, they of course called the cops. Next thing I know, I'm being carted off to a teenage version of prison and an investigation starts on the rape claim. Turned out she was lying. She just, made it all up. She wanted to get back at him for some perceived slight, and I was the tool she decided to use.
"I spent three months in jail. Would have been life, but he woke up from the coma I had put him in and got the charges dropped. We weren't friends after that, of course, but he had forgiven me. That was his last kind of, act, in our friendship I guess."
There was more to the story that Delvin wasn't telling, that he didn't feel was necessary to bring up at the moment. What exactly had happened during those three months that he had been locked up. Because while it was difficult to talk about what he had done, it was even harder to face what had become of the women who he had fallen madly in love with, and the child that he had only gotten to hold just once.
"You did some fucked up shit man, in taking those women. Taking Cora."
His glossy chocolate eyes looked over at the tall man, his expression filled with anger once more, but also, pain.
"It could be argued that you were a grown man, you should have known better, but...given the shit you told me last night, I can't help but wonder if you ever really understood what you were doing. It wasn't physical pain you caused those women, but mental. You left scars on their psyches that can never be healed, and I think you..."
A few more tears spilt down his face once again as he lost the will to continue to look at him. Turning away, he let out a frustrated sigh.
"I think you did it because it was normalized to you. Because, it was done to you, and probably for so long that you couldn't even understand a life outside of that viewpoint. You told me last night that you were isolated, that everyone would avoid you for fear of your mother, so that probably means you never had anything to ever point you in a different way. To show you a different way, and if that's really the case, then I'm sorry. I'm sorry, and I sincerely pray that you are being honest with me, that you do regret what you did, and that you got enough strength left in your feet to help me get Cora out of there."
His face turned back to him slowly, his expression burning with intensity as he stared at him hard.
"We're not going to leave her there. Consider this my last act in our friendship, because I did consider you a friend. So," he said, bringing his hand up for him to shake.
"I'll help you. Let's go get her."
Delvin's eyes had been lingering on the recorder once again, as he became torn on what to do. The slightly buzzed part of his mind wanted to 'continue' their conversation, but fearful, guilty part of his brain acknowledged that they needed to look at that damn player. The choice was soon made for him, however, as what Damien had to say drew forth another look of shock.
It was true. He could have lied. Infact, it would have been so damn easy for him to lie in that moment that it could have been years before Vin ever found out the truth, possibly never even knowing. But...he hadn't.
"...but she told me that it's not up to me whether I deserve her or not, and that she'll make that decision herself."
Vin ran a hand through his hair nervously, looking away from the man on the ground as his brain tried to make sense of all these new moral dilemmas while it simultaneously tried to stall the inevitable. He had such an urge to shoot his foot out and kick that recorder away, that it almost overtook him and won out, only to be denied at the last second when Damien picked it up. He wanted to tell him to stop, to not the play the sick fucks games, but it was too late, the audio was already going and her screams of pain reverberated through him and shook him just as badly as it did Damien.
Over the course of the next five minutes, as it didn't seem to be a very long video, (though his perception of time could have argued otherwise), Vin stood there in shock and disgust. Every second that passed was more difficult to bear than the last, and by the time it was finally over, he had one hand on his hip and the other covering his mouth, his eyes wide and wet as he looked away and tried not to gag. He had known that Kuznet was evil, truly evil, but he had yet to witness it firsthand. Until now...with their sweet, innocent friend who didn't deserve such cruelty.
The recorder falling to the ground made him flinch, his mind still reeling and on high alert from the stress of what they had both been witness to. Yes, both of them. Damien had done some evil shit, there was no getting around that fact, but as Vin looked down at him and stared, something in his moral compass finally pointed true. For right now, in this moment, he wasn't a rapist in Vin's eyes. He was just a broken man with a dirty past, and who was being unnecessarily and cruelly tortured; completely inhumane.
And maybe it was because of this, or maybe it was because Delvin was feeling just as lost and hopeless, that he found himself taking his hand away from his face and moving his guitar off his shoulder. He let it slide to the ground, slowly and gently, and then he took the short step over to Damien's side and slid down against the car next to him, his legs splaying out over the hard, dry, dirt and almost touching his own. He brought his hands in his lap and stared ahead blankly, not knowing what to say for a moment. When he did finally start to speak, it was slowly, and hesitantly, as if he were scared of saying each word.
"Our dad was a piece of shit to me and my sister, and my mother. He never got the chance to hit us, but, we grew up with a lot of violence in that house. It got to be such a regular occurrence that I got used to it. Thought it was normal, even, that most people just have shitty parents growing up and that's just how life was. It's not, or, it shouldn't have been, and I didn't realize how it was effecting us until I almost killed someone. My best friend at the time."
His brown eyes glanced over at Damien before quickly looking away as a few tears spilled over and ran down through the scruff on his face. He hadn't talked with anyone about this in years, and he was finding it difficult. Nonetheless, he continued on.
"I was fifteen and was making a lot of mistakes. Pick anything off the list of 'bad for you', and I was probably doing it, short of heroine. I was violent, and wild, and damn near out of control. And I... and I had a baby on the way. That's what...started it..."
His throat gets too tight for him to continue for a moment, and he has to clear it several times before going on.
"The mother came to me crying, bawling. I mean, absolute mess. It took me forever to get her to calm down enough and tell me what happened. She said that he raped her-my friend, and threatened to kill me if she said anything. Well, needless to say, I flew into a rage. I went straight over to his house and kicked in his door; didn't even give him a chance to say a word before I was on him. I was...a lot bigger than him, so he didn't really have a chance...
"His parents found him that evening. Bleeding, unconscious. I didn't know he was still alive, I..."
He has to stop again, the tremor in his voice making it difficult to speak. After running his fingers through his hair to push it back and swallowing, he finally continues.
"I had every intention of leaving him for dead. Thought I did, even. I didn't think he deserved to live after what he'd done. Well anyway, they of course called the cops. Next thing I know, I'm being carted off to a teenage version of prison and an investigation starts on the rape claim. Turned out she was lying. She just, made it all up. She wanted to get back at him for some perceived slight, and I was the tool she decided to use.
"I spent three months in jail. Would have been life, but he woke up from the coma I had put him in and got the charges dropped. We weren't friends after that, of course, but he had forgiven me. That was his last kind of, act, in our friendship I guess."
There was more to the story that Delvin wasn't telling, that he didn't feel was necessary to bring up at the moment. What exactly had happened during those three months that he had been locked up. Because while it was difficult to talk about what he had done, it was even harder to face what had become of the women who he had fallen madly in love with, and the child that he had only gotten to hold just once.
"You did some fucked up shit man, in taking those women. Taking Cora."
His glossy chocolate eyes looked over at the tall man, his expression filled with anger once more, but also, pain.
"It could be argued that you were a grown man, you should have known better, but...given the shit you told me last night, I can't help but wonder if you ever really understood what you were doing. It wasn't physical pain you caused those women, but mental. You left scars on their psyches that can never be healed, and I think you..."
A few more tears spilt down his face once again as he lost the will to continue to look at him. Turning away, he let out a frustrated sigh.
"I think you did it because it was normalized to you. Because, it was done to you, and probably for so long that you couldn't even understand a life outside of that viewpoint. You told me last night that you were isolated, that everyone would avoid you for fear of your mother, so that probably means you never had anything to ever point you in a different way. To show you a different way, and if that's really the case, then I'm sorry. I'm sorry, and I sincerely pray that you are being honest with me, that you do regret what you did, and that you got enough strength left in your feet to help me get Cora out of there."
His face turned back to him slowly, his expression burning with intensity as he stared at him hard.
"We're not going to leave her there. Consider this my last act in our friendship, because I did consider you a friend. So," he said, bringing his hand up for him to shake.
"I'll help you. Let's go get her."
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