I was in a similar situation about 12 years ago, and had no idea those thoughts and feelings i had were shared by many others. I feared I was somewhat unnatural.
It was online I met a man who caught my eye. A real 'witty and delightful smart arse', and over the next few months we developed a good friendship. Twelve months in, that friendship changed, and took on a sexual nature. As we explored together, he mentored me to understand about my sexuality, and accept and embrace who I am. It was something i valued greatly. That relationship which was only ever online, due to our circumstances and location, blossomed and grew for 10 years, when sadly that very treasured man passed away 18 months ago, leaving a huge gap in my life.
If there are alarm bells ringing, don't ignore them. Take your time, and wait for someone special who will help you, they are out there. If you find one, and he has an older brother, or father lol send him my way.