One night stands

[doll_2354]

I remember having this conversation with a guy I was talking with. I told him how I in general don’t trust men who ask me out because of something that happened in past, so I said I’m not looking for a relationship. He said about going out, like one night stand but the thing is I need to trust you, be comfortable around and know you enough to even initiate a hug. Even if I tried it, I feel it will be like mechanically going through a process rather than enjoying it.

So I don’t know if it’s just me or there are other people who need genuine feelings to have sex.

 

[BillyWalrus]

So I don’t know if it’s just me or there are other people who need genuine feelings to have sex.

Not just you. I am a guy but I still need to feel an attachment before I sleep with someone.

 

[liqueur]

I don’t know if it’s just me or there are other people who need genuine feelings to have sex.

It can go either way for me. It can be just about the pleasure— and more and more for me these days, about giving pleasure— or it can be about the emotional connection. And sometimes, the emotional connection rises out of the physical. One of the best nights of my life was a one night stand (I confess I wish it had been much more than that). In that case, despite it being only one night, both the emotion and the sensual were there in full flood.

 

[liqueur]

It can go either way for me. It can be just about the pleasure— and more and more for me these days, about giving pleasure—

Full disclosure: a lot of it has to do with gender, for me. I am pansexual/hetero-romantic. I love having sex with men, but have a very hard time trusting them. If emotional feelings arise, I'm as likely as not to run the other way. With women, it's very unlikely for me to have sex without developing emotional feelings for them. Sadly, I've never had the opportunity to be with a trans person, but I think it would be case by case, depending on how much masculine or feminine energy I felt around them.

 

[42DarkNightOwl]

I remember having this conversation with a guy I was talking with. I told him how I in general don’t trust men who ask me out because of something that happened in past, so I said I’m not looking for a relationship. He said about going out, like one night stand but the thing is I need to trust you, be comfortable around and know you enough to even initiate a hug. Even if I tried it, I feel it will be like mechanically going through a process rather than enjoying it.

So I don’t know if it’s just me or there are other people who need genuine feelings to have sex.

It's not just you. After having a single one night stand at 20 I decided not to repeat it. I do not regrt it but it was mechanical as you discribe. To date, 30 years later I have kept that promise to myself.

Recently, for the 1st time in my life I have had a few fantasies that have included strangers, but dispite what my fantasies may or may not be, I know that the majority of the enjoyment comes from my partner rather than the mechanical, biological process which ends with a disrespectful 'Thanks, bye'.

To be honest, how the world has changed since 1996, if we did happen to meet in a hotel bar, I probably wouldn't trust you enought to relax either.

 

[FeistyPhxGirl]

Girl same!
Its not to build a relationship, its to establish a trust.
Ive seen so many people end up on the news about going on a tinder date and they end up dead.
Its scary out here

 

[Not Normal]

The one time I had a one night stand, it was with someone who I knew for a long time and wished to have been starting a long term partnership.

 

[HornyLittleDevil2026]

I had a one night stand once. It was a few months after a bad break up with a girl I had been with for a year and was totally in love with, but that's another story. I was lonely, horny and forced myself to take a girl out I wasn't really interested in, just to get out of the house and try to feel normal again. We met at a restaurant near my apartment after she got off of work and then went back to my place after dinner. We sat in my living room and sipped on a few beers. Once it got late, she decided to leave, so I walked her to her car. As we said goodbye, she threw her arms around my neck and gave me a long deep tongue kiss. I felt my dick doing somersaults and asked her to come back inside with me. At first she was hesitant but quickly relented. We made it to my bedroom stripped down, and got in bed. There wasn't much passion in it at all. It almost felt transactional. We weren't making out like we had been just minutes before, and ripping one another's clothes off. We just quietly got undressed and then got into bed, almost mechanically as though we had done this together a million times. At any rate, I guided her to my cock and she gave me a pretty decent blow job. But with my eyes closed, I was imagining my ex the entire time. The way she was positioned, I could easily access her pussy, so I reached over and slipped a finger between her legs and confirmed that she was good and wet, so I stopped her cock sucking, laid her down and climbed on top of her. I held her tightly to me with my chin pressed into the top of her head while I fucked her as savagely as I could, again, the whole time imagining it was my former girlfriend. This poor girl caught the business end of a grudge fucking she didn't even deserve, plus I shot my repressed load deep inside of her as well. Afterward, I just rolled off of her and told her she could spend the night if she wanted to but she didn't so, since I was still naked, I only walked her to the door this time. Early the next day, I made it clear through an email that I wasn't ready for a relationship with her and apologized for rushing things. We never saw one another again.

 

[Shaglus_Ziegler]

I’ve had some amazing one night stands. Ideally there’s no pressure and if uninhibited people can let their inner freak out! Not always but quite often!