The Lady’s Hand (A Dickings & Dalliances Adventure) - (Closed Except By Invitation)

[Nouh_Bdee]

The door shakes intensely before suddenly falling still. The cock reveals a hidden hinge and flips down into a groove that opened up in the door, dumping Sprite onto the floor. Long-left dust puffs out from the seams between the door and the wall as the heavy stone door slides into a pocket in the stone.

Eventually, the room beyond would be revealed. The remains of an ancient bed clump in the middle of the room, broken boards from millenia past rest under tatters and dust that were once whatever the Delathi used for bedcoverings. Broken shelves and ruined books sit in the corners of the floor, and the only other exit is an old wooden door in the back wall. Thick enough to have kept its hinges, the door nevertheless has a hole in the center, large enough to climb through. A faint specter sits just inside the door, ghostly pants around its ankles as it sits on its ancient privy. It does not yet seem to notice the intruders.

 

[justspitballing]

There wouldn’t be much point of trying to sneak around and hide from view of this being behind the very last door. There was only one entrance and Sprite would be needing to take the torch with her, plus the opening of the door made them well known as it was. At least the door opening should have, though the ghost, or whatever it was, had not responded.

Sprite slowly got up from where she lay, a small puddle of her enjoyment being left behind. She went and grabbed the torch, but did not bother to get dressed again. There was the remains in the next room of a bed and from what little Sprite could see of the spirit they were somewhat undressed themselves. The last test of this temple was to be of sexual nature, no doubt.

“We have yet another room. There is a viewer before us, let’s find out what they want,” Sprite said to Arx.

After that she picked up her axe as well and then pressed forward. She walked into the remains of the bedroom and stepped onto the tattered sleeping area, completely naked, a bit of her juices still glistening on her thighs.

“We’ve solved all your puzzles ghost. I do hope you have enjoyed the show, but just because we are happy to please does not mean we can be taken lightly,” Sprite warned.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The ghost does not react at all, sitting there with a look of concentration on its spectral face.

 

[Poprockz]

Once the door was open, Arx observed Sprite’s entrance into the new room, wondering why she hadn’t taken her clothes with her. True, this seemed to be a sex temple, but there was always the risk of being attacked at any given point.

Her eyes widened at the ghost, then squinted. Was he… taking a shit? Did ghosts shit? Could ghosts shit? Maybe he was just pretending to shit to relive the good old days of… bathroom contemplation? The changeling continued to stare directly at the ghost, her eyes practically burning holes in him with how deeply she was contemplating the bizarreness of the situation she found them in.

If she were a ghost, she wondered if she would bother pretending to have bodily functions. Of all the things it could have chosen to do, taking a shit would have been very low on Arx’s list of undead activities to pantomime. All the while, she never broke eye-contact with the ghostly shitter.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The spectre is not frozen in place. It's phantasmic eyes are blinking, it's translucent lungs rising and falling with pretended breaths, and its fingers occasionally drum on its ghostly knees. But, it seems not to notice Sprite and Arx at all.

 

[justspitballing]

So Sprite stood there for a good six minutes and then became rather board. It was unclear how to spark this spirit into motion, though she had no plans on taking her axe to the door before the undead. She didn’t really feel like picking a random fight with it.

As such she had to assume the being couldn’t be stirred. Maybe they were stuck in some kind of past advents and only a specific action could smack them out of it. Figuring out such an action could take days. She had entered the room naked, mostly to still work out her sexual wants, but if the ghost wasn’t going to respond, there wasn’t a reason to stay undressed like she was.

She pulled back to the prior room, went back to her armor, and took the time to get dressed.

“They are going to ignore me, so I think we have to ignore them, until something happens,” Sprite said, more to herself then anyone.

After getting dressed again she entered back into the bedroom and started rummaging the old and falling apart books. If there was nothing of note she would approach the door with the hole on it and try to yank it open. If the ghost wanted to do them harm they could not avoid it forever.

 

[justspitballing]

The books, as expected, were in to poor of a condition to do anyone any good, or so it seemed, but hidden among them in the second book Sprite scrolled through, was a parchment containing a spell to summon a demon from the abyss itself, and not even a lesser one.

Such a spell would be worth a fortune, likely much more gold then the nobleman would ever be willing to pay them for the item they came here for. That was if Sprite was willing to sell it, which she was going to say no. You brought forth a demon, people were going to die, badly. Sprite knew she wouldn’t be okay with such a fate for a stranger. Sprite also doubted she, herself, could read the spell. Like, she could try, but it could very well get her killed. Demon’s did whatever they pleased unless you knew their name, and if you did know their name they would find a way to get their freedom and then destroy you for knowing such things, or so the stories went.

Sprite knew she would have to let Arx know, but she would do that later when they had less problems on their hand. She pocketed the scroll, as well as ten gold coins she found and even a second small map in among the books. This map had a section of the woods lightly circled after the mountains they were close to. She hoped it wasn’t pointing the way to the ACTUAL temple they would have to go to. What a horrible fate that would be.

With these new items obtained it became clear the only thing left to do was to confront this ghost. Sprite went to grab Arx for help. She would not be facing this being on her own. She nodded at Arx and gestured towards the spirit. It was time for them to face this threat.

 

[Poprockz]

All the while, Arx had been staring down the ghost. Its lungs were moving, so it was pretending to breathe, but obviously it wanted nothing to do with them. She couldn't make heads or tails of its expression, nor could she discern whether it was truly ignoring them, or whether it was unaware of them at all. If it knew, then the ghost was one hell of an actor. Shrugging in response to Sprite, she put her finger over her lips in a "shhh" motion and gave her a pointed look. With that, she pretended to walk to the side of the room to look at something.

When she got there though, she silently moved along the side of the room, her body crouched and low to the floor as she made her way to the hole in the door. She was soon pressed against the side, pausing for a moment. What she aimed to find out was whether the ghost was truly blind to them or not.

With a swift motion she suddenly jumped in front of the door, letting out a loud "BAH!" Hopefully, the ghost would be surprised enough to jump.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The ghost finally reacts, rolling its immaterial eyes and looking toward the door with an impatient expression. It goes through the motions of a sigh and opens its mouth to shout—in a voice that bypasses the harpy and changeling’s ears to reverberate across their bones—“OCCUPIED!”

 

[justspitballing]

Sprite was annoyed that all this build up was indeed to an obvious joke. The ghost was just going to the bathroom. He must have died while having a heart attack from eating something that did not agree with him. Well, this was ridiculous and Sprite did not much care for her time being wasted.

Sprite walked over, grabbed the hole of the door, and yanked the thing open. She brandished her axe, ready for a fight, but fully expecting this ghost to just vanish before her. Of course likely an axe against a spirit would do no good, but Sprite was just to annoyed at this point to care.

“Time’s up! Your business is done!” Sprite stated.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The ghost’s frustration turns to rage as soon as the door opens, and it’s face twists into a monstrous visage of slavering ectoplasm. An inhuman screech peals out from it’s glowing form, and the terrifying noise echoes through the stone halls.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The vedger, who had just waddled into the room, grunts in alarm, and bounds out of the room, racing back into the hallway

 

[Poprockz]

Arx thought the "occupied" was unnerving, but that ghostly shriek was something else. It made her hair stand up on end, the changeling thinking that a lesser individual might have pissed themselves. She was not one to do such a thing, but she couldn't stop her body from trembling slightly. Street thugs she was used to, ghosts she was not.

She readied her blades for all the good it would do her, fighting the urge not to turn tail and follow their vedger companion out the door.

 

[justspitballing]

Seeing that all that was indeed inside this room was a ghost going to the bathroom and more collapsed walls around it, Sprite closed the door. The creature did scream at her, but it hardly registered. A harpy such as herself was blessed to not be easily scared or charmed. Of course she wasn’t the only one there. As she did turn around she saw Arx doing a very poor job of covering her fear.

There was no point picking a fight with this ghost when it looked like this was nothing more then a dead end. Sprite was all about proving her might, but if she got Arx killed, well that would prove nothing. And they really didn’t have a way to even fight this thing.

“Bathroom hog,” Sprite stated as she walked away. At least she would seem strong to Arx, that was something.

Sprite went back into the room they were in before. They had now officially hit a dead end and it was time to back track. This was always the least fun aspect of exploring a place like this, but it often needed to be done.

“I suppose we’re going down the other direction, unless you have other ideas?” Sprite spoke up for Arx to hear.

After that she headed out of that room and this time around headed to the right, where there was a caved in wall leading into a natural cavern. Here there was a doorway in the wall and then an open room that was past said closed door. Which way to go from here was of course unclear, but she did have a second being there with her to decide.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The vedger pops its head out from the room with the phallic staircase as Sprite walks by ,its body language apprehensive. But, it follows close at the harpy's heels, waiting for someone else to decide which path to take, the natural tunnel revealed by the collapse, the closed door, or the open hallway...

 

[Poprockz]

Still a bit shaken from that inhuman screech, Arx gratefully followed Sprite backwards out of the room, never letting her eyes leave the ghost until they were in the hallway. She breathed a sigh of relief, looking at the new options before them.

Given the choice, she was more inclined to check the closed door, as closed doors were often hiding something of interest.

“Let’s try the door,” she suggested, reaching out and opening it to see what lay behind it.

 

[justspitballing]

Sprite nodded in agreement to Arx suggestion. She quickly put down her torch and let it lay on the dirt, providing some light, and held her axe tightly with both hands. Her weapon of choice was awkward to handle with the need for them to see, but she was still somewhat managing.

Once Arx had the door open Sprite walked into the opening, once again acting as a source of defence for her fellow adventurer. She really couldn’t turn her need to be a bodyguard off. Her eyes slowly adjusted to the new light of the room before her and she carefully moved forward, ready for anything as always.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The door creaked open to reveal a small storage room lined with crumbled shelves and piles of indiscriminate dust, as well as another ghost. Unlike the previous spirit, this individual reacted almost immediately to the explorers’ presence.

What looked to be a young elven man, lean and strong, faintly glowing with the same pale blue translucence as the other ghost, quickly turned around and stopped stroking his phantasmic cock.

“FINALLY! I was about to—wait. You’re not Kaia.” His spectral face fell in an embarrassed wince. “Sorry, uh…” He made no move to cover himself. “We’re having a…there’s a thing…ah, fuck it. Welcome, I guess?”

 

[justspitballing]

With this being a storage room it would be another dead end if it wasn’t for the ghost. Just like the past one, this one seemed to be in some kind of loop of his past actions, though this one seemed far more responsive. It was clear to Sprite that she could not fight these things or threaten them, which were her key strengths, but if they played into his past loop they could maybe get information from him. It was possible, though unlikely, that he could give them directions to The Spectral Phallus. Sprite was willing to give getting the information out of him a go at least. She still held the axe tightly in her hands. She quickly lowered it, holstering it into the sleeve attached to her skirt.

“Kaia sent for us. She didn’t want to keep you waiting. I’m just the protection though,” Sprite lied quickly, looking over at Arx. Hopefully Arx could help to pull this deception off, she was the expert in things like this.

Sprite did her best to curtsy before the ghost. She had not ever done something like this in years, and she never did such an action in such a short and potentially revealing skirt. Her hands grabbed the blades of her skirt as she put her right foot behind herself and bent down. With the blades pulled out it did become very clear she had no panties on, though her sex itself stayed covered. She stumbled slightly and then pulled herself back up.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The ghost just nods and hops in place. “Alright. It’s time to do this.” His cheeks puff in imagined exhales. “Any tips for a first-timer? How do these things usually go?”

 

[justspitballing]

Sprite was a bit surprised her lie actually worked, but it would be up to Arx to pull them through this. To say the least Sprite had no idea how to respond to the phantoms comments. A first-timer? How does it usually go? Given his cock was on full display the most likely answer was it had to be sexual, and that put Sprite at even more of a disadvantage. She pulled herself behind Arx and gently pushed Arx forward. For once Arx was going to act as her shield and not the other way around. Other then these actions she kept silent, hopefully the ghost would just pay attention to the rogue before him.

 

[Poprockz]

Arx hesitated for a moment before deciding to just go for it. Obviously he meant to do something sexual with the woman, and it was his first time doing so. However, she wasn't sure exactly what they were aiming to do. The Drowish Deep-Dive? The Gnome Nipple Clincher? Surely not the Succubust-a-nut position. In any case, she wanted to be convincing, but it was somewhat hard to do when she had to be vague.

Walking over to the ghost, she put her arm around his shoulder. Though it would be more accurate to say that she hovered her arm just above it as she didn't want to embarrass him by having her hand go entirely through his torso. With that she used her other arm to sweep it to the side as though painting a picture.

"My best advice in these situations is to be genuine- don't put on airs until you're more experienced. If your moans sound like a tired maid warming her ass to the fire after a cold day's labor in the snow, then let it be so. Women can usually tell when you're faking or trying to hard to sound a certain way." She hoped that helped, or at least confused him enough to believe her by default.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The ghost nodded at Arx’s sage advice. “Okay, just sort of let my reactions happen. Okay, I can do that.” He looked into Arx’s eyes. “But how do I, like…how do I get started? Do I wait for them to come to me, or do I just stick it in, or…?”

 

[justspitballing]

Sprite saw that both her and Arx were getting into deep water. They had guessed wrongly to some degree that this was just sexual in nature. The ghost asking if he waited until they came to him almost sounded like he was trying to summon something. Sprite knew this was a faith practiced that revolved around sex, but she didn’t know anything more then that. Chances are if the ghost wanted to summon something it wouldn’t pan out and they would just be standing around awkwardly and have to admit they didn’t know what was going on.

“Arx here is very up for a man that takes action!” Sprite said to try and stop the man from asking questions. Also, to be honest, if the ghost did fuck Arx it would mean Sprite would get to witness that and enjoy the show. It would be a once in a life time thing to see and to say the least she was very excited to witness it.

 

[Nouh_Bdee]

The ghost smiles warmily, his spectral face flickering in glowing blue light. He laughs, the sound echoing strangely in the empty room. "Good to know," he says with a wink that doesn't completely obscure the eye. "So, are you two here for the ceremony?"