The Outlook

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Slips in next to her. Smiling softly, watching the waves with her, just calmly standing next to her. Rolling my eyes at the thud of the fae.
 
Turning at the sound of friends reminding me I am not alone, I offer a smile and a hug of greeting. The melancholy in my heart lifts a little.

Thank you, Yeishia. I'll remember that thought tomorrow.

Noting the state of my fae cousin and friend, I smile at her, offering her a helping hand up.

Good evening, Angel. I see you found your pleasure in the absinthe again.

I turn slightly to greet my newest acquaintance, grateful for the company.

This is such a soothing place, Aus. Thank you for creating it. It reminds me of my dream of living in tropical Belize someday.
 
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Angel giggles and instead of rising, pulls you on top of her with even more giggling. She smells of anise and spice.
 
Smiles at Thryi while contemplating the mess that is my Angel.

I am glad you like it, you're welcome here always. In truth, I am glad to see you here. We have some unfinished business as it were.

I'd be careful helping Angel, she's like a loaded cannon...
 
Laughing playfully at the Angel's antics, I disentangle my limbs from hers to look up at Aus.

We do, but it can wait a bit. We should not force things. There have been the flirting comments, and the hints at more, but we still don't know each other very well, do we?
 
Nods easily

I did not come here to accost you Thryi. I've been talking to Vail, and there are some things that concern me about your viewpoint on D/s and I just wanted to make sure that you know I'm available to ask.

Gestures to my butler to pick up the Angel and deposit her on the lounges. He does, grimacing when she gropes him.
 
Angel laughs and giggles more.. and then her face freezes. "Hey, thats not supposed to be there!! Wait.. you're a boy.. ewww!"
 
Looking at her appraisingly, wondering if I will ever truly understand.

I appreciate that. I need time to figure it out, and whether its really for me. Since coming here, I've found myself experiencing things I would have thought I never would want or like, and I actually enjoy them. Maybe this is one of those things too. I don't know. I'm willing to allow that possibility, since other things have surprised me.
 
Yes. Eeew.. you little cretin.

At my signal he dumps her unceremoniously on the lounge and turns heel, stomping out. Meanwhile I'm not even sure she noticed. I turn and nod at Thyri.

You know, I didn't come here with the purpose of exploring my kink.. just my sexuality. The kink part of it just sort of hunted me down. When I first walked through these doors... I was completely vanilla. Shut it Angel. I was. But something about it spoke to me. So I researched and learned, and something about D/s just.. I just got it.

Being open to your own sexuality, I think is the most important piece.
 
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It has been a weekend of ups and downs for me, emotionally. I have to be honest about that. I wouldn't say I've exactly been myself.

Having said that, I think the closest thing I've ever come to experiencing this sort of thing before was when my husband once punished me for coming home late from a night out with girlfriends, drunk. He gave me my first anal that night, and it was rough, it hurt. Some would have even called it rape. But it was the hottest sex I ever remember having, and I loved him for it. Is that anything like what you mean?
 
Well, there are elements of D/s there, perhaps. There is power/control/punishment.. all elements. I am playing fast and loose with this phrasing of course.

The more important question would be, how did it make you feel?
 
slow, soundless footsteps carry me toward the Outlook, holding a pair of heels in my left hand....
 
It was primal, animal. It made me feel so wanted and possessed because he did it out of jealousy, or just to show me I was his. And after the initial pain, I did enjoy it. To this day, that always turns me on. I know a lot of women won't even do that, but it gets me. It made me quiver down in my core just to hear a lover say they were going to do that to me, or to have them put me in that position, knowing what was coming next.

But anal sex is still sex I recognize as sex. Maybe I have the wrong idea about D/S, but I don't really make the connection between inflicting pain or humiliation for its own sake, and sexual pleasure.
 
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Suddenly feeling as if danger is near.. I look around but can only see shadows... I shrug off the feeling and look at Thyri

You can't compare yourself to others. What other women, will and will not do isn't about you. If you got a thrill out of it, then that means something to you. Kink and even BDSM is very subjective. It's about what ~you~ get out of it. To that end, when you're open to the various things about kink, then experience them you can decide if it works for you or not.
 
The thing that confuses me, that I seem unable to do, is to know ahead of time what I will like, other than what I've already experienced. That is what confused me in the Vortex. I didn't know what to say, in the context.
 
See. That's the best part. Playing in your imagination, your body will still react. Describe that, read what the other women are writing, play with the words. You'll find that it's a little like telling a story and a little like playing pretend.

Believe me, you'll know if something isn't working. If you don't like it.. end it.
 
I think I might know what you mean. I do that in Yahoo with a couple other girls, and i know that seeing certain words or phrases come up on my screen does give me a visceral reaction, very physical, even though its just words. They invoke ideas and feelings in me, because of what the words represent.

I will remember that, and sleep on it. Also, I think I'll go back and reread what happened, what was asked, and how I responded in the Vortex, as well as a few PMs I've received lately. I think it will give me perspective and a better understanding.

We'll talk again. Thank you for explaining to me tonight. Until we meet the next time, Good night, and Happy Birthday.
 
Its all about the emotions for me.. I revel in them.. fear.. joy... release.... whatever gets me there.
 
Angel giggles, lolling about on the couch, emerald.. or wait.. is it jade.. tongue hanging out. She props a foot and leg up on the couches back, leaving the other trailing on the floor. that short nighty just doesnt cover it.


but, i'm having such a good time!! pretty!
 
cant keep a fae caged.. it would kill her. The chain is bad enough.

Honestly, you saw what happened to tinkerbel in that jar.
 
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