This isn't a personal ad, but advice

[sexyblondebbw84]

Since I have no one else to turn to, I decided I'd come to my fellow Literoticans for some advice. This question may be repeated somewhere else around here, but here goes and excuse me for posting it in the personals.

My problem is my boyfriend. He's 9inches and sex is 80% painful, 20% pleasurable. What do I need to do to get used to a 9 incher?

Any and all answers appreciated. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

 

[kaithel]

From what I have heard, for most women, the distance from the vaginal opening to the tip of the cervix is considerably shorter than 9", and for most women, banging up against the cervix is painful. That may be the discomfort you are feeling.

Unfortunately, there may not be a "magic solution" to expand yourself. Ultimately, there needs to be communication between you to tell him that it's painful and teach him not to thrust quite so deeply.

Different positions may help as well, so have fun experimenting to see which positions allow him to penetrate you most comfortably. Lots of foreplay and more water-based lube may also help, as well as having him penetrate very gradually.

Communication is the key...

 

[juvare]

There is this whole section on Lit that is devoted to advice. How did you miss it?

Being 9 inches is never the problem. Being with a douche that doesn't understand how to use what he has and has no desire to learn or being someone who doesn't tell them to stop because it's painful... that's a problem.

Have you honestly never indicated to him that it is painful? That what he is doing doesn't feel good? Do you moan and bear it?

There are lots and lots of ways to have sex with someone who is more generously endowed and it be super duper pleasurable for both parties. The main thing you have to "do" is be open and honest about it all and give a shit about each other enough to find ways to make it work.

Have you brought it up with him? That's the very first thing you have to 'do'. Unless he was a virgin when you met, odds are this won't be the first time he has heard it and likely knows that pounding away doesn't feel good for the chick. If he was a virgin then it's the perfect time to learn!

 

[RuneBlade]

Yep, communication. Advocate for yourself.

 

[Experiencedguy]

Just my two cents: Look, sex with a 9" penis can be great. Or, it can be horrible. If, after a few tries, it isn't at least 90% great, something is wrong. Most women can't handle 9", to the max, at least at first. But, it can be a shared, learning experience that can turn out to be wonderful.

Javare is right on the mark. If he is experienced, he should know this. If he isn't, then you need to teach him. If he is experienced, is he doing this soley for his own pleasure? If it is painful (and he is anything but brand new to fucking), he is just using you for his own pleasure. If so, this is something you really need to think about.

And, yes, the human body can (with time and experience) adjust to almost anything, and find it enjoyable.

Look, I'm a guy, who is only normal (?), and met a guy with a really fat 10" cock. He was very patient and slow, but after a long time, was able to take all of him both orally and anally. The reason: He would always stop and ask: Enough or more.

I wish you luck in your endevers with this guy - or to realise early where his feeling really are: In his penis, or in his brain.

 

[NomadLady]

It seems from others have pointed out that the pain is coming from the direct contact with your cervix which can be painful...especially if he is pounding it.
There are plenty of other ways, positions, to be able to enjoy sex with someone well endowed and intercourse doesn't have to be the "end all".
Is he getting you very hot, wet, aroused, excited etc before he even attempts intercourse?
Your post didn't really seem to indicate that the problem was with intercourse but I am just making an assumption here. Also have you tried anal with him? Do you enjoy anal? There is no cervix to hit there and that might be a solution if you are both into it.

Good Luck, and like everyone here has said COMMUNICATE!!!!!!!!

 

[infinity706]

Well, technically it should be fornix slammed. The cervix is very rounded, so dicks glide by it easily.

Now, as for anal, you can still have the same problem. The rectum is only a few inches long and then, it curves, so you still can't just pound straight in with any length.

 

[Firebrain]

I'd experiment with positions. Ultimately, though, you can't make it fit (people seem to think that because we can give birth, we can fit all sorts of shapes and sizes; this may be so, but giving birth frickin' hurts). I have a friend who dumped a guy because his penis was too big and it became apparent that it wasn't the first time it had happened to him.

 

[mjar65]

positions

A few have suggested you try something different - here's one concrete idea you might start with...

Try taking him in and then closing your legs a little (or maybe a lot) - that way he'll get more pressure along his length but maybe won't feel the urge to drive in so deep.

Mind you, if he is just ramming into you without any concern for what you're feeling then you're probably better off without him.

I dunno how many lovers you've had... the other way to approach it could be to mix up the play and do lots of other sexy things rather than it always being focussed on him sticking his weapon into you - lots of oral or using your tits on him etc etc.

Hope it will turn out better for you both.

 

[Honed_Hunger]

Proper position choices ,communication and personal consideration on the part of the one who swings the big stick are the keys to enjoyable sex.


Lots of good info to be found here.............

http://www.lpsg.org/

 

[Annabell4you]

Try taking him in and then closing your legs a little (or maybe a lot) - that way he'll get more pressure along his length but maybe won't feel the urge to drive in so deep.

Very good advice. I had a nine incher back in college that didnt decide to keep me... Fortunately for me after three surgeries on my cervix, only doggy hurt, but if you put ur knees together your cervix is farther away. Please let us know more.

 

[Legend_X]

I would take a ruler, and a magic marker, draw on him where he has to stop... and make him pay attention If he doesn't stop where he is supposed to, whack him with the ruler.

 

[juvare]

I would take a ruler, and a magic marker, draw on him where he has to stop... and make him pay attention If he doesn't stop where he is supposed to, whack him with the ruler.

Hahahaha!!