What Have You Learned About Yourself Recently??

[Gracie13]

A whole lot

 

[SMNaughtywife]

A small nibble of chocolate daily goes a long way with me.
I’m okay every other day, and even went some stretches without it and survived.
But my smile is the best and my eyes the brightest having tasted my favorite chocolate daily.

 

[Erotically_Yours]

Apparently, I am the absolute worst person to be around if you have insomnia.

 

[Demons_Run]

To never doubt my instincts again.

 

[lacandy]

I've learned that I've made some mistakes along the way...

 

[inkandiridiumnibs]

That a woman I have never met, never seen nor heard before can turn me into a balling mess of tears in 30 seconds, all the while I am surrounded by a large room full of complete strangers...

All because she was basically telling my story...

 

[Tdfkats]

I am a dumbass.

 

[may_I_please]

That your self perception is developed by the people and types of opinions you choose to surround yourself with

 

[HBergeron]

I rarely learn new things about myself, but today I reaffirmed a basic concept: that everyone is not like me, and one cannot fault anyone for not seeing things or thinking the way they do.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

.....

 

[LikeableMe]

That after spending my young adult life as a workaholic, I now want a work-life balance. That is a big deal for me.

And then realising I don’t have TIME for a work-life balance, and that I don’t really have any friends around me, as I pretty much just had work acquaintances. I don’t even have those since I changed jobs. I’m fed up with waking up, going to work, and being there all day and having to rush to bed as soon as I get home, to start it all again the next day.

I no longer have time to work out, which I need to do for my health condition. I don’t have time to cook a meal, and just throw together whatever is fastest so I can get to bed as quickly as possible. Because I don’t get home at a reasonable time, there’s no meeting anyone for dinner, or coming home and cooking, then winding down with tv or a good book. It’s rush home as fast as I can, eat as fast as I can, wash and get my butt in bed as fast as I can.

I don’t even like my job. It’s not worth this, it really isn’t.

 

[MrEd63]

That after spending my young adult life as a workaholic, I now want a work-life balance. That is a big deal for me.

And then realising I don’t have TIME for a work-life balance, and that I don’t really have any friends around me, as I pretty much just had work acquaintances. I don’t even have those since I changed jobs. I’m fed up with waking up, going to work, and being there all day and having to rush to bed as soon as I get home, to start it all again the next day.

I no longer have time to work out, which I need to do for my health condition. I don’t have time to cook a meal, and just throw together whatever is fastest so I can get to bed as quickly as possible. Because I don’t get home at a reasonable time, there’s no meeting anyone for dinner, or coming home and cooking, then winding down with tv or a good book. It’s rush home as fast as I can, eat as fast as I can, wash and get my butt in bed as fast as I can.

I don’t even like my job. It’s not worth this, it really isn’t.

I know nothing about you or your circumstances but I think you need to find a job that suits you better and will allow you to get your life back.

 

[LikeableMe]

I know nothing about you or your circumstances but I think you need to find a job that suits you better and will allow you to get your life back.

I think so too, I don’t even feel like I have a life right now. I feel so isolated. This schedule wasn’t the one I agreed to, I worked part time at this job whilst I held another job. I left that one, even though I was passionate about that, as this one offered me regular hours. I considered it very carefully, and asked lots of detail, such as what the exact shift pattern would be, and the pay. So I decided to go for it, thinking I could take the course I want to on a weekday evening, that I’d have a lot more free time and be able to claw my health back from the decline it was in.

After I’d already reigned the other job and went to sign the contract, I was told “oh by the way, we’ve increased it to this” - it was over 15hrs per week more than I agreed, and every shift I’d agreed to was changed. I was told I had to sign it that day, and I felt anxious and pressured as I was scared the offer would be removed, and I’d be left without a job. So I ended up stuck in a job I have no passion for, and it’s become my entire life. I’m really bored there as well, I’m qualified to do a lot more, and only took this for the financial security, so don’t feel challenged at all. So I’m stuck in my head pretty much all the time.

There’s a lot more to consider, and I won’t publicly talk about it, but the gist of it is that I’m unhappy, and trying to help myself realise that it’s okay not to be happy with something and to want to change it. I know they’ve tried to help me and give me as much work/financial security as they can, but it wasn’t my goal, and I feel incredibly guilty to be unhappy about it.

And now I’m going to be late for work, so have to run.

 

[base10]

What Base said here...

Being a doormat has nothing to do with being submissive.
Nothing, not a single thing.



Then they aren't a Dom.



Exactly. Excellent advice.

Thank you for the support, good to have a female voice agreeing here

 

[txgent101]

20 Seconds

When I meet someone for lunch for the first time to see if we might be a suitable dating match for each other --- I can tell in the first 20 seconds or less if it will be a go. I used to chide myself for being too quick to judge, but that first face-to-face impression is almost always a reliable indicator.

What is anyone else's experience?

 

[starrynightin64]

I've learned that I am tired and less tolerant of rude, nasty people.
It's really not that hard to be polite, professional and do your job.

 

[BeautifulBlueSky218]

I keep learning more about my desires and writing about them in my diary. Anytime I seem to share something about myself, I find myself getting awkward. It's all about sharing something personal about yourself and getting feedback from it.

I'll always remember when I noticed things about myself, I would look up cougars having sex with younger men on porn sites and getting off to it. Apart of me thought it to be wrong, but another part of me got excited by it and sort of would daydream about it. I'd end up meeting some young guy somewhere, him being awkward and I end up having sex with him.

One time I did share this with someone and so many people told me, "date someone your age." "date an older man." "why would you want to be with a younger man" and so forth. They all sort of criticized me for being open about myself. I felt like shit I remember and never speaking of it again.

For the longest time I tried to avoid porn sites. Anytime I went onto one I would always end up looking the same type of porn, cougars and young men being together. In one porn, a younger gentleman.... he looked to be about 26 I think or younger and the woman just asked him openly, "would you like to touch my breasts?" The moment he sat next to her and played with them, I started to daydream again and I couldn't stop looking at them. Anytime I tried to resist looking up these sort of videos online, it got harder and harder for me.

Everyone has their own thing. Everyone loves different type of woman and men, everyone has different fetishes. That's the one thing that baffles me, I'm being looked down upon because of my taste and what I like. I don't like younger men because I want to teach them the ropes or anything, I actually want to become involved with one, as a relationship. Anytime I'm out in public and I spot a younger gentleman out or anything, I get very sexually aroused just by looking at them. If they're with their gf though, I totally respect them as being a couple.

Anytime I'm turned on if I see a younger man in the crowd, I always go home and masturbate. I would never date any guy who's illegal. That's just sick and wrong, but I did have a relationship with one guy who was 22. Sadly it didn't work out due to distance. I did tell him all about it though and how it came to be, he never judged me once. At the end of one conversation, he admitted to me once, "Yeah, I love older woman, so I understand."

Anytime I open up about this to anyone, I always get looked at like "omg, your sick...." I would never judge anyone, so it's a bummer when I get judged.

 

[txgent101]

I keep learning more about my desires and writing about them in my diary. Anytime I seem to share something about myself, I find myself getting awkward. It's all about sharing something personal about yourself and getting feedback from it.

I'll always remember when I noticed things about myself, I would look up cougars having sex with younger men on porn sites and getting off to it. Apart of me thought it to be wrong, but another part of me got excited by it and sort of would daydream about it. I'd end up meeting some young guy somewhere, him being awkward and I end up having sex with him.

One time I did share this with someone and so many people told me, "date someone your age." "date an older man." "why would you want to be with a younger man" and so forth. They all sort of criticized me for being open about myself. I felt like shit I remember and never speaking of it again.

For the longest time I tried to avoid porn sites. Anytime I went onto one I would always end up looking the same type of porn, cougars and young men being together. In one porn, a younger gentleman.... he looked to be about 26 I think or younger and the woman just asked him openly, "would you like to touch my breasts?" The moment he sat next to her and played with them, I started to daydream again and I couldn't stop looking at them. Anytime I tried to resist looking up these sort of videos online, it got harder and harder for me.

Everyone has their own thing. Everyone loves different type of woman and men, everyone has different fetishes. That's the one thing that baffles me, I'm being looked down upon because of my taste and what I like. I don't like younger men because I want to teach them the ropes or anything, I actually want to become involved with one, as a relationship. Anytime I'm out in public and I spot a younger gentleman out or anything, I get very sexually aroused just by looking at them. If they're with their gf though, I totally respect them as being a couple.

Anytime I'm turned on if I see a younger man in the crowd, I always go home and masturbate. I would never date any guy who's illegal. That's just sick and wrong, but I did have a relationship with one guy who was 22. Sadly it didn't work out due to distance. I did tell him all about it though and how it came to be, he never judged me once. At the end of one conversation, he admitted to me once, "Yeah, I love older woman, so I understand."

Anytime I open up about this to anyone, I always get looked at like "omg, your sick...." I would never judge anyone, so it's a bummer when I get judged.

BBS, your honesty is very refreshing. I doubt that any 'civil' person on Lit would judge you for your particular longing, taste, or preference. I certainly do not. My own (rather eclectic) tastes might very well be considered outre' by some narrow minded persons. I am glad that Lit is a place where we can share those thoughts and feelings without condemnation (naturally staying within the Lit rules of course). No, I don't partake of every variety of sexual expression here, but the ones I do enjoy are very satisfying to me (and must be to many others, otherwise, the topic would not exist).

There are some possibly relevant Lit threads that may be of interest to you:
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1225568
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1454042
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1458246

Don’t know if any of that helps, but I applaud your candor. And obviously you are not alone!

 

[LadyElsbeth]

I keep learning more about my desires and writing about them in my diary. Anytime I seem to share something about myself, I find myself getting awkward. It's all about sharing something personal about yourself and getting feedback from it.

I'll always remember when I noticed things about myself, I would look up cougars having sex with younger men on porn sites and getting off to it. Apart of me thought it to be wrong, but another part of me got excited by it and sort of would daydream about it. I'd end up meeting some young guy somewhere, him being awkward and I end up having sex with him.

One time I did share this with someone and so many people told me, "date someone your age." "date an older man." "why would you want to be with a younger man" and so forth. They all sort of criticized me for being open about myself. I felt like shit I remember and never speaking of it again.

For the longest time I tried to avoid porn sites. Anytime I went onto one I would always end up looking the same type of porn, cougars and young men being together. In one porn, a younger gentleman.... he looked to be about 26 I think or younger and the woman just asked him openly, "would you like to touch my breasts?" The moment he sat next to her and played with them, I started to daydream again and I couldn't stop looking at them. Anytime I tried to resist looking up these sort of videos online, it got harder and harder for me.

Everyone has their own thing. Everyone loves different type of woman and men, everyone has different fetishes. That's the one thing that baffles me, I'm being looked down upon because of my taste and what I like. I don't like younger men because I want to teach them the ropes or anything, I actually want to become involved with one, as a relationship. Anytime I'm out in public and I spot a younger gentleman out or anything, I get very sexually aroused just by looking at them. If they're with their gf though, I totally respect them as being a couple.

Anytime I'm turned on if I see a younger man in the crowd, I always go home and masturbate. I would never date any guy who's illegal. That's just sick and wrong, but I did have a relationship with one guy who was 22. Sadly it didn't work out due to distance. I did tell him all about it though and how it came to be, he never judged me once. At the end of one conversation, he admitted to me once, "Yeah, I love older woman, so I understand."

Anytime I open up about this to anyone, I always get looked at like "omg, your sick...." I would never judge anyone, so it's a bummer when I get judged.

I hope you know that the person you confided in was not truly a friend. A true friend would listen and respect your experience and if she did not have anything positive to say about it, in her opinion, she would still support you. It sounds like she was only judgmental about it.

Negating someone's erotic fantasies and/or experiences because of your own tunnel vision or narrow-mindedness is a complete turnoff for me be it friend or lover. Sometimes hearing other's experiences can give you new fantasies that you would never have thought of.

I am so sorry she made you feel this way and I hope you never give up on your quest for a younger love interest since it seems to be what truly turns you on.

 

[LadyElsbeth]

That I am a giver and I am not always sure that is a good thing.

 

[txgent101]

That I am a giver and I am not always sure that is a good thing.

Although it is written in the Bible that "it is better to give than to receive", it does not say it is wrong to receive. I agree with you that an attitude of continually giving, giving, giving, can leave you empty. I think we have to receive as much as we give else our lives are not healthy.

Also, I have met people who say they are givers not takers, but receiving is not taking.

Ok, that is my philosophical offering this morning.

 

[sofiasvana]

When I meet someone for lunch for the first time to see if we might be a suitable dating match for each other --- I can tell in the first 20 seconds or less if it will be a go. I used to chide myself for being too quick to judge, but that first face-to-face impression is almost always a reliable indicator.

What is anyone else's experience?

Which is why I prefer a coffee or cocktail date for the first time. Not stuck with someone for the length of a meal!

I try not to rush to judgment, though. First dates are not easy and I'm willing to give the benefit of the doubt in most cases.

 

[Demons_Run]

I'm more independent than I ever thought I could be.

 

[mnbreastluver]

That I’m dealing with stuff better than I thought I could.

 

[KarenB59]

That I'm good at something and there's nothing wrong in accepting compliments