What would you expect from a story about women in the Army?

[gunhilltrain]

Yes sorry, I should have been more clear. I've been working on the series off and on for a while.

There's 'subversion of expectations' and then there's 'failure to meet expectations', one of those applies to the series! Either way when people click on a story about women in the Army, I don't seem to be giving them what they expect/want.

I have to ask: have you ever been in the military or do you know someone well who was? It's not absolutely necessary, I suppose, but it would help.

I hope I don't hurt your feelings too much, but your initial premise doesn't grab me. Why were these scientists imprisoned if they are still valuable assets? And would female soldiers really volunteer because "it's the right thing to do?" The whole thing sounds like some of the ideas that float around here, but it doesn't seem plausible. If it ever happened, I could maybe imagine the government hiring call girls who have a purely mercenary (pun intended?) interest in doing this.

But you've already submitted some chapters, so you are now committed to your plot. Did any of your readers leave comments about it?

 

[Lady2020]

Here's my sister's experience of the Army: she was continually harassed by a woman who wouldn't take no for an answer. This was back in the 70s. Guess who ended up with PTSD? This is not a subject that can be couched in hot Lit erotica. It's about real life and the destruction it causes.

 

[mish2mash]

I have to ask: have you ever been in the military or do you know someone well who was? It's not absolutely necessary, I suppose, but it would help.

I hope I don't hurt your feelings too much, but your initial premise doesn't grab me. Why were these scientists imprisoned if they are still valuable assets? And would female soldiers really volunteer because "it's the right thing to do?" The whole thing sounds like some of the ideas that float around here, but it doesn't seem plausible. If it ever happened, I could maybe imagine the government hiring call girls who have a purely mercenary (pun intended?) interest in doing this.

But you've already submitted some chapters, so you are now committed to your plot. Did any of your readers leave comments about it?

I have a good general knowledge of how the army works.

The plot is that the scientists/engineers were imprisoned because of their technical knowledge (google Gerald Bull or Abdul Qadeer Khan) and you'll get an idea of how that can be a problem for governments.

Their imprisonment is totally illegal, and because the government want them to continue their work, the prisoners have a great deal of leverage. The first chapter covers the Army desperately trying to get them to restart work after they downed tools in protest.

It is almost impossible to keep a secret when a large number of people are aware of it. One government official hit upon the idea of using sex to do it, used in a number of different ways, provided to those working on the project to minimize their discontent at being locked away without access to the outside world, and provided to certain influential people as a means of blackmail so they continue to support the project. No matter how it's used the aim is to keep the project running while maintaining it's secrecy.
,
In the story they previously did try to use prostitutes but they became too much of a security risk. Then they posted in soldiers who had a history of being promiscuous and they simply refused to do it. Then they hit upon the idea of posting in a soldier, who was career driven, highly disciplined, and extremely loyal, and she's the first one to agree to do it.

I got a few mostly positive and a lot of downvotes. I really think it's because people aren't getting what they expected. Also I think another problem is that some of the male characters are really unappealing people.

 

[gunhilltrain]

I have a good general knowledge of how the army works.

The plot is that the scientists/engineers were imprisoned because of their technical knowledge (google Gerald Bull or Abdul Qadeer Khan) and you'll get an idea of how that can be a problem for governments.

Their imprisonment is totally illegal, and because the government want them to continue their work, the prisoners have a great deal of leverage. The first chapter covers the Army desperately trying to get them to restart work after they downed tools in protest.

It is almost impossible to keep a secret when a large number of people are aware of it. One government official hit upon the idea of using sex to do it, used in a number of different ways, provided to those working on the project to minimize their discontent at being locked away without access to the outside world, and provided to certain influential people as a means of blackmail so they continue to support the project. No matter how it's used the aim is to keep the project running while maintaining it's secrecy.
,
In the story they previously did try to use prostitutes but they became too much of a security risk. Then they posted in soldiers who had a history of being promiscuous and they simply refused to do it. Then they hit upon the idea of posting in a soldier, who was career driven, highly disciplined, and extremely loyal, and she's the first one to agree to do it.

I got a few mostly positive and a lot of downvotes. I really think it's because people aren't getting what they expected. Also I think another problem is that some of the male characters are really unappealing people.

I did look up a bit about Bull and Khan. My quick impression of the two of them was that - am I correct? - they were more interested in their own careers over all else. Khan eventually died a hero in Pakistan and Bull was probably assassinated by Mossad for his dealings with Iraq. So who did the readers think were the unappealing male characters - the scientists or their jailers? Or both?

I guess one wouldn't need that many women to keep them satisfied. Like, maybe five per prisoner? One wouldn't need an entire harem. (And I don't know how large those were, although the Ottomans seemed to keep a couple of hundred ladies around.)

I wonder if some of your dissatisfied readers were women who didn't like the way the female characters were portrayed. It does strike me as a bit icky. Did any women specifically state that? I've had an occasional (like maybe two) female reader who had some objections like that. Beyond that, I have no idea of what people would expect of such a story. (Lots of sex seems to be popular here!) I had a four-part series here that was very unpopular for most readers.* Do you have an ending in mind or are you just winging it? You can't change course much at this point and you have to see it through to the end.

* It was about Andy Warhol shooter Valerie Solanas (1968), and the few readers who remembered her thought she was, well, a vile crazy person. (Partially true, perhaps.) I just kept writing it as I thought it should go.

 

[AndersonsBiographer]

Be sure to account for the inevitable: that those whom you mostly will hear from will be a very small minority of vocal naysayers irritated by something irrelevant.

If I read an instance of your PFC loading a "clip" into his pistol, I'm going to automatically wonder to myself what kind of bizarre fantasy military thinks it's a good idea to issue antique C96 Mausers to its enlisted men. I'll only get pedantic about it if I'm in an especially goofy mood.

I think it's almost impossible to answer the original question. One's experience in the army will vary considerably depending on one's personality, occupation and duties, location of assignment, and so on and so forth. Someone in an active combat zone is going to have a very different experience from someone working in hospital in Europe, and someone filing paperwork for eight hours a day in an office back in the States is going to have a still different experience. This is going to have a major effect on one's romantic life. I also imagine that a 56A or 56M probably doesn't approach such things in the same way that an 11B would, though I suppose it isn't impossible.

One thing a lot of people don't seem to realize about the Army, the US Army at least, is just how BIG it is. 463,083 active duty personnel alone as of 2022, per wikipedia. That's about equal to the population of Raleigh, North Carolina, or the number of people currently employed by Target. What would you expect from a story about women who've ever lived in Raleigh, North Carolina? Or a story about women who've ever worked for Target?

That's not a completely fitting comparison, but I hope you see what I'm getting at.