What would your life be like if...

[SirLicksAalot]

I like my results, so I would not change the path taken to get here.

I envy you [sigh]. I remember during college, in one of the workshops our college dean held every year, as I was asked question. And even though that was 12 years ago, to this day I could still vividly recall the assured feeling I had as I answered with a grin and a little bit of that youthful arrogance: "No I would not have changed a thing!"

Fast forward to today-- my life mired with a slew of frustrations-- it would take me the whole day just to enumerate that things I would have liked to change. However, these are not "major" things most have answered in this thread, like shacking up with the wrong person or not finishing college, but small everyday determination to be an antisocial which nonetheless proved to have had and still is having a major effect on my life.

I don't think there was a point in my life when I just decided to prefer the company of my own self. I don't know. But really if there was, this would be the biggest thing I would love to go back on, smack the living shit out of my young self and yell: "Snap out of it!"

 

[CabbageRose]

I reflect upon the past from time to time, but don't allow negative events to color where I am today. I made some poor choices in my youth. I paid my dues, learned and moved on. Having children changed my career path but ultimately offered different options that were of a great benefit in many ways.

I wonder more about those that have no regrets, and never bother to take the time to reflect and gain introspection regarding the events that have shaped their lives. Are they incapable of doing so, or are they simply afraid of what they might learn about themselves? They spend their lives blaming everyone else for their unhappiness. They can't see that they are partially responsible for the life that they lead.

Is it a "me generation" thing to be programmed to believe that we can do no wrong and live our lives in total disregard of the consequences?

I'm not maso in the least, but I'd rather fall flat on my face in front of a crowd if it made me learn something. Self-deception is the worst thing that we can do to ourselves. It limits us. It prevents growth. It sucks.

 

[sb2009]

One of the things that has helped me not be so hard on myself for not making the better choices at that time, etc has been to have kids. My therapist said something that was really inspring to me: she helped me realize that an 18 year old, even though an adult, is still a vulnerable inexperienced person and that I should try to imagine MY girls at 18 in the same position. Would I harangue them (like I do myself in my head) for not being smarter, etc and not seeing how some things would turn out? No, I'd say "Damn, you did a good job in a really bizzare shitty situation!"

 

[Cattypuss]

I envy you [sigh]. I remember during college, in one of the workshops our college dean held every year, as I was asked question. And even though that was 12 years ago, to this day I could still vividly recall the assured feeling I had as I answered with a grin and a little bit of that youthful arrogance: "No I would not have changed a thing!"

Fast forward to today-- my life mired with a slew of frustrations-- it would take me the whole day just to enumerate that things I would have liked to change. However, these are not "major" things most have answered in this thread, like shacking up with the wrong person or not finishing college, but small everyday determination to be an antisocial which nonetheless proved to have had and still is having a major effect on my life.

I don't think there was a point in my life when I just decided to prefer the company of my own self. I don't know. But really if there was, this would be the biggest thing I would love to go back on, smack the living shit out of my young self and yell: "Snap out of it!"

You make it sound like the situation is irrevocable.

It's never too late, ya know

Or, as George Elliot rather more elegantly put it,

"It is never too late to be what you might have been"

 

[FurryFury]

I like how my life has turned out too, for the most part. However, being an explorer at heart, I'd absolutely do things differently. I went through a lot of shit in past to get here. I don't believe that is absolutely necessary for a happy outcome but even if it is, I'd rather go through some different shit.

 

[SirLicksAalot]

I wonder more about those that have no regrets, and never bother to take the time to reflect and gain introspection regarding the events that have shaped their lives. A.

I believe the answer falls on the extremes stages of our lives: When one is young, and at another, when one has lived a long life, seen alot and from there developed a sense of "wisdom" about the world. Anything in between is probably just a failure to even consider the question at all.

 

[SirLicksAalot]

You make it sound like the situation is irrevocable.

It's never too late, ya know

Or, as George Elliot rather more elegantly put it,

"It is never too late to be what you might have been"

Thank you for the support. And I do make it a point to force myself to socialize however anxious the activity makes me feel.