Who here is actually the person in their avatar?

[JudasIscariot]

That is not me

 

[Artfan2]

Yes it is.

 

[Dream59]

Ex-accuse ME all over the place, StripperSlutWife's HUSBAND, butt if UR a SUB then who the HECK is the dom? LUTZ

BTW have any of U ever played ILIKEU™?

Since writing my comparison of the BEST & WORST dating apps that I personally know of, I've discovered another VERY POSITIVE point about the best, details follow, so I decided to send copies of the entire article plus a short LOVE letter 4 my favorite & PROBABLY I'd 1/2 written the opposite 4 their opposite had contacting them not proven impossible since they obviously don't want 2 hear from the suckers they rip off especially not criticism or reviews. With the GOOD app., I simply touched "feedback," pasted in the following, and was thanked 4 sending it (admittedly by a BOT; however, there's a fair chance humans R reading and sharing it even as I slowly hunt & peck these words 'çuz my iPad's 1/2ing keyboard problems.)

I Wrote the following review comparing ILIKEU™ with ZOOSK & had put it on the back burner in the busy kitchen of my mind as we all tend 2 do with yesterday's dishes, so as 2 serve gourmee meals rather than stale left overs, when just moments ago I was BLOCKED from bypassing the pull-down menu because my "date" was under age! As I myself was RAPED @ age nine by a dirty H.S. drop out, I HATE perverted adults who take advantage of innocent kids, B it by FORCE or Seduction, so I was reminded again how MUCH ILOVEILIKEU™ I'm sure U already KNOW how good ILIKEU™ is; as an artist myself, albeit in a minor way compared to TRUE GENIUSES like UR selves, I know that it never hurts 2 hear a kind word amid all the myriad silly complaints. (In fact, I jumped 2 my gun & fired a wad of nonsense at U B 4 finding out almost immediatly it was just that. I hope my review's a two-bird stone of abject apology 4 that & RESOUNDING praise 4 UR quantum leap 4-wards in Dating Apps!)
(Begin Review)
Hi, I got here by Google search 4: "post your honest apple app review by and for real users" 2 which UR Blog came up as TOP & only really relevant URL. As an HONEST USER banned by Farce Boob @ least a baker's dozen times (& usually on FRIDAY just 2 RUB Their Power on my face - or would that require a time machine?) 4 not following a stupid rule about NOT making new friends! Why do we NEED Fake Book 2 talk with OLD friends we meet @ work daily, &/or whose ph#s & e-male/fee-mail addies we have? Anyway, I'm making a brief self-intro 2 my also quite short app review comparing 2 dating apps, one FREE & the best I, a published eroticist of horny tails based on cybersexual engineering, have ever had wet dreams of seeing, the other with HUGE Fake Boosting, a totally useless attempted rippoff with disturbing possibilities 4 blackmailing users, because I SEE from skimming through UR post how nieve I was 2 think I could just come online, write my review, & have someone recognise its validity, who could make it VIRAL, yet I believe it's WORTH warning real people of what a DANGEROUSPIECEO is & helping them discover WHAT GREATEROTICFUNILIKEIS

As a writer, I'm naturally tempted 2 innundate you with hundreds of skillfully crafted black witticisms 2 demonstrate knowledge of my trade, butt a short letter of complaint I wrote a few weeks ago should suffice. If not, simply follow the links, & read as much as you can handle. LOL

To: support@grandmashomerecipes.com
Subject: I'm a bit worried about your cancellation policy. Is there one?

Suppose that I did sign up for the program shown in this screen shot... uh, no place to attach a screen shot? Hmmm... Are we all living in the 21st century or using pony express to deliver our e-mail?
Well, it was ... maybe ... "Grandma's Home Recipes?" Something like that.. Do you know the one?
For one day, it's a reasonable 0.49 pounds, but the price SKYROCKETS after that, so is it SAFE to let you filthy crooks know my credit card number? Can I have any chance at all of cancelling in one day, or will I be automatically charged for one, or more likely, multiple months? Thanking you for an HONEST answer, which is about as likely as God tongue fucking the Devil's asshole, IMHO.

Your suspicious as HELL non-customer, Kinky LOVE, erotic poet at deepundergroundpoetry.com [ Erotic Poems: http://tiny********/Kinky-poetry Erotic Stories: http://tiny********/Kinky-Stories ]

p.s. You're not a BOT R U? Let me know what you think if you're a human and not a BOT! (Human's should easily pass the Turing Test. Look that up in Wikipedia if you're one of the non-nerds who's not totally familiar with computer trivia, and write me a short, not over 100,000 words, essay proving that this as not a simple transformation of Gödel's Incontinence Theorem with footnotes complaining about how much meta-mathemeticians are always disrespecting logicians, like:
MM to L: "Yo, Cinga to Madre!"
L to MM: "Lo siento mucho, pero yo no intiendo Espanyol."
MM to L: "Tu Madre tiene leche caliente!"
L to MM: "Volez Vous Cocher Avec Merde?"
UND SO WEITER!) <--- No BOT could even begin 2 unravel these clues! Maybe you should use this instead of Captua®? Always gives me eyestrain. I'm sure BOTS are much better at deciphering those images than humans. LOL

Following the very valid principle, "a word of add-vice, cold as ice, twice as nice as flied lice, if this don't suffice, roll them dice, butt U'll pay a BIG price:"

FYI, ZOOSK, BLOCKING MY ACCOUNT IS A CRIMINAL ACT SINCE I CAN NO LONGER ACCESS MY PERSONAL INFORMATION AND INTIMATE PHOTOGRAPHS, COPYWRITED PRIVATE MATERAL THAT YOU HAVE STOLEN, IMPLICITETLY THREATENING ME WITH BLACKMAIL! YOU ARE NOW CRIMINALS, & I WILL HAVE YOU ARRESTED IF YOU DON"T RESTORE MY ACCESS IMMEDIATELY!

With most dating apps, or apps that DUDES date with, since that's WAY up in the top 1/2 of the 2 MAIN reasons GUYS use the www, the other one being pretending 2 B girls [ http://tiny********/NO-GIRLS-HERE-69 ] 2 FLIRT w/horny guys. LOL I soon find my self writing snippy notes like: "I'm sorry, but could you please explain your dating restriction in a bit more detail. Here I am [Note the location near Nagasaki University. That's in Japan, in case the name of the second city the Unnatural Sadists graced with an atomic blessing isn't taught in your history classes?] on the opposite side of the planet from Spanish speakers, and you're thinking I might molest some chica guapa? Seriously, do many people actually TRY to DATE with this app. in spite of language and distance barriers when there are literally hundreds of dedicated dating apps. not to mention walking down to the corner bar like I'd do if I wasn't totally satisfied right in my own bedroom? [By Madam Palm & her 5 horny hookers, I didn't SEX-plain.]"

With, ILIKEU™, I was instantly offered a chance to photograph myself, making the photo available 4 evaluation by potential dates & advised that by using a fake photo I'd miss the point. Since I hadn't yet granted the app access 2 the over 10,000 photos on my iPad, I put on a hat and sleeping mask, then photographed myself at my desk w/o seeing the result; nevertheless, within seconds, I was receiving positive responses from dozens of cute REAL girls young enough 2 B my granddaughters with British looks and names, perhaps because my VPN had me in London at that time? In my usual fashion I sent Feedback like: " How R names chosen? I live in JAPAN, so Why no Japanese girls? Can I change languages? Yo quiero unas chickas muy guapas, por exjemplo! Why only YOUNG girls, NICE, butt how about NAUGHTY LADIES my age? I'm BI-sexual, so can I see how GAY GUYS like me 2, please?" This was, naturally, totally ignored, and not 2 long after granting access 2 my photo library, I told a guy using the same photo of cunnilingus as licker I was using as lickee: ''WOW! Imagine the odds AGAINST us meeting in THIS game - I play 99.9% other games!" After a bit more FUN, I realized the odds were rather better that HE simply copied "my" profile pic & re-used it 4 flirting porpoises. [They're NOT cold fish, butt HOT blooded & even have gang bangs.] Soon another guy sent me a comment in Russian, or another language that looks like that, [I replied in languages I DID know at least a BIT: "ाप का नाम कया हाि? 你 要不要 吃 我？ Volez Vous Coucher Avec Moi? སོརརཡང་ི་དོན ཏ་སཔེའཀ་ུསསིན" NEVER FEAR, USE OF languages OTHER THAN ENGLISH IS OPTIONAL. AFTER YOU CLICK A small button rejecting a handy pull-down menu of convenient native-language responses, u can use any language keyboard u have loaded 2 write couple of uncensored sentences, meaning you can exchange ph. #s or addresss 2 move on 2 next phase w/hot date. ;P All considered, ILIKEU™, is as GOOD as Zoosk is bad. It easily adapts 2 level of sophistication or horniness, never asks 4 credit-card ''verification'' & is paid 4 by an unobtrusive ad at bottom of page.
(End Review)
Hope U girls & any boyfriends who accidently helped out by staying out of UR way while U got this magnificent mistresspiece finished (I M NOT a female chauvinist beliving boys R only useful as walking penises...I just haven't met any of those hen-tooth pair-of-gones not 4 lack of aspera ad astronauts. It's just so HARD 2 find the right stuff. I mean ALL the boys I know get HARD & try 2 Stuff it in... Well, U all KNOW from SEX-spear-he-inches 8, 9, 10, the more, the merrier, butt keep those boys out of UR kitchen if U want 2 get any cooking done! LOL) ENJOYED reading my review even 1% as much as I LOVEILIKE™ 'Cuz, if so, u MUST be 1/2ing wall-2-wall MULTIPLE SQUIRTING ORGASMS! Just don't drown anyBODY 'cuz I'd hate 2 have that on my conscience when Satan and Jesus argue over who gets stuck 2 my tar-baby BLACK-humor soul.

So, basically, I'm making TWO main points with this post. First, TRY ILIKEU™ U might like it! LOL & Second, M I the ONLY WRITER LEFT around here while the rest of you whipper snappers become ''guru'' by posting one-word drivel in a futile attempt to achieve human contact (See the post below, above, who gives a rusty fuck? Which begs a guy he hopes is a girl, ''let's chat'' ROTFLMAO@ such pitiful nonsense. TRY A CHAT APP, U poor idiot.) be that the case, Literotica has fallen low indeed since the BAD 'ole days when we WRITERS posed POETRY and STORIES here.

Jesus! Write a book. I hear that Simon and Shuster is trying to make up a short fall on Hillary's book so they may publish it for you.

 

[omgitselaine]

It's little ole ........ moi

 

[CapnCuddly]

It's little ole ........ moi

Omg yes and just as cute as ever.

 

[naomirubybaby]

Yes it is.

Very nice

 

[SpoiledRedhead]

Very nice

It is her. Lovely eyes

 

[naomirubybaby]

It is her. Lovely eyes

Thank you

 

[Miasorrow]

Yes, it's me.

 

[Henry]

still me.

 

[swag_man]

Yes, it's me.

I am glad.

Not me.

 

[Slave Master]

100%

Katie

 

[omgitselaine]

Tis .............. I

 

[BiTodd]

Tis .............. I

I have been cumming to your avatars for years. Thank god!

 

[Artfan2]

Tis .............. I

That's a very seductive pose Elaine. Have you posted a larger version of it?

 

[omgitselaine]

I have been cumming to your avatars for years. Thank god!

Hmm nice to know

That's a very seductive pose Elaine. Have you posted a larger version of it?

No I don't believe I have ................ yet !?

 

[Jackotheshadows]

I am.....and I know Elaine is...

 

[Artfan2]

No I don't believe I have ................ yet !?

The way you're looking at the camera with your top partially down and your lovely legs exposed is very inviting!

 

[Artfan2]

Very nice

Thanks. And I like your big eyes and your full lips.

 

[susanne1987]

I

I would be on my avatar pic but for some reason its not showing? grrrr

 

[Jackotheshadows]

I would be on my avatar pic but for some reason its not showing? grrrr

Hm, you just hit 100 posts so you should get it on 101...

 

[thedarkestfairy]

Yes it is me over there

 

[susanne1987]

Hey

Yes its me, lol so cool my avatar is up lol

 

[vibes]

My side B

Yes its me, lol so cool my avatar is up lol

You are very pretty

 

[7inchglory]

I am