Wife’s Personal Political Correctness Filter fails when she has been drinking.

[Loverskitten]

I'm guessing sr71 has another issue with trex. Unbunch your panties, dude.

 

[Emerson40]

And this to the last poster.

Yes, I think I'm the only one seeing the joke here. The OP is upset that his wife talks sex to him in private and he whines about it on a PORN BOARD THAT HE'S PLAYING ON. He is upset about discussing sex with his wife but not on a porn board with a bunch of strangers? You don't see the "funny" in that? You don't see how "Internet world" fucked up that is? No, he's not talking about tomatoes and recipes. He is talking about sex talk.

I see. You're focused on him questioning sex talk with his wife, and discussing this with strangers on a sex "PORN BOARD".

I think a few others (myself included) see him asking a question about his wife's PC filter, it's possible malfunction after a few drinks, and what we think about him doing the same thing to teach her a lesson.

I think he is upset about the filter (or lack thereof) and not so much that she mentioned schtumping the Bartender. Sure, the bartender comment may have stung, but perhaps he would be equally uncomfortable about her blurts had she said something racially inappropriate, or about the character or appearance of her mother-in-law.

I also think "SEX TALK" is not at play here. Perhaps she's not being playful here at all. The OP finds her comments - or at the very least their timing - more hurtful than playful.

I guess if I do see something funny here, it is how folks can all read the same thing, but some will get something entirely different from it.

 

[LadyVer]

I guess I'll go with the "you're dense" thing then. I am sticking right to what the OP did come here and post. It was about his wife's sex talk. It was not about tomatoes and recipes.

And, yes, I noticed that you've completely ignored the issue that he's up tight about his wife talking sex in private but that HE, HIMSELF, IS PLAYING ON A PORN BOARD. That's double standard.

I think you're going out of your way to read into something the OP never said or implied. I don't appreciate that you've made this personal, but it doesn't surprise me. It's not new. Maybe the OP will clarify the issues for you, although I doubt it. If you want to say anything else to me, you'll have to send me a pm.

 

[GrrlFriday]

I'm a bit worried that she may feel like she needs to be drunk to confide in you about her fantasies - is there any way you can get her to open up to you when sober?

 

[desertslave]

To the OP: What is the nature of your objection to her blurts. Is it that she's speaking in an 'unladylike' manner (to your perceptions)? Is it that she only says such things when she's been drinking? I'm just a little puzzled as to what the problem is.

Have you NEVER commented to her about the attractiveness of another woman?

I know not everyone is as casual as we are (plus I'm bi) but we often joke to each other about people we find attractive. There's no harm in it, we're not running off to 'do' someone else, it's just healthy, entertaining speculation.

 

[sunandshadow]

I'm confused by the idea that there should be a "personal political correctness filter" in a private conversation between spouses. Normally I would say there shouldn't be, since being able to say what you are thinking is the essence of mental intimacy. Yes, one should avoid saying hurtful things to one's spouse. That's not what the phrase "personal political correctness" says to me though. And I don't really see how describing a past lover's penis could be hurtful, though the other example is more borderline. So yeah, I'm confused.

 

[sr71plt]

I'm guessing sr71 has another issue with trex. Unbunch your panties, dude.

I have no issues with trex, and I'm not the one here with bunched panties. I'll leave that to those who don't realize/accept that this is a porn site--and that the topic of the OP was sex, not tomatoes or recipes.

In the meantime, I'll reiterate that I think that Tonguedancer has called this one--and that I see that others are beginning to gather around common sense reality a well.

 

[kage007]

It sounds like she's sexually confident and wants to share with you. I'd take advantage of that and count yourself lucky. I know personally I don't have to worry about being "politically correct" with the people I love. If that is something you want her to do you should tell her that and see where it goes from there. I would be offended if someone I was in a relationship told me they didn't want to hear my stories or opinions.

 

[silverwhisper]

akatrex, you've gotten some good advice. i don't know where the hell she's going with it, but recording it does sound like a good idea. it makes me wonder how much of a facade she's putting up while she's sober.

i'm kinda concerned that you've been sober for 8 years and she's drinking: is this not a source of tension between you?

and guys, ignore idiots who don't understand that lit is more than just sexsexsex. nobody needs to waste time trying in vain to educate children.

ed

 

[GorgeousGeekGirl]

People change when they drink, not for the better. You have 3 choices:

Accept she turns into a mouthy broad when she's drunk and blow it off as the liquor talking.

Not say anything to her but seethe in resentment until you blow and have huge ugly fight.

Say something when you're calm, basically that she gets ugly when she's had a few and you think she should avoid getting drunk.

@@@@@@@@@@@

On her end:

You blow it off and she will keep doing it.

You blow up in frustration and the big ugly fight will probably escalate into "so you couldn't say this a long time ago?! What about you when you _____________?"

Say something calmly, she will either accept or reject it.

@@@@@@@@@

Everyone knows people get stupid when they drink. That's why they shouldn't drive or operate social media when they've had a few.

 

[philthepill2]

Wise man once said

"A drunk mans (womans) words are a sober mans (womans) thoughts"

For the record...the wise man was drunk too.

So you have to make her comfortable enough to talk about this stuff when sober...cuz lets be honest...we all fantasize....we all see someone that we find attractive and imagine what it would be like to be with them....to see them naked. If not...then you aren't living life!

 

[sr71plt]

and guys, ignore idiots who don't understand that lit is more than just sexsexsex. nobody needs to waste time trying in vain to educate children.

ed

OK, I'm game. What part of the OP wasn't about sex? It was a guy complaining about his wife's sex talk in private by talking about his wife and her sex talk on an open sex web site.

Absolutely hilarious. And you all sucked into Internet unreality #32--accepting the perspective of a poster just because he posted.

What I see in the OP is a wife struggling to get her husband to get his nose out of Internet porn and pay attention to her. I sort of wonder how this thread would have gone if she'd been the one to post the dilemma--with her picking and choosing what the scene is.

 

[Emerson40]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkt12a9hno1qeg3quo1_500.jpg

 

[sr71plt]

I'd love to let it go. I've made the points I wanted to make. When others stop jabbing at that, it probably will go.

I'll point out that there are a lot of posters now asking the same sort of questions and making the same points I was getting at.

 

[LadyVer]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkt12a9hno1qeg3quo1_500.jpg

Hey Em.

 

[Loverskitten]

I'd love to let it go. I've made the points I wanted to make. When others stop jabbing at that, it probably will go.

I'll point out that there are a lot of posters now asking the same sort of questions and making the same points I was getting at.

Sooooo you'll continue to argue and insist on having the last word until everyone agrees with you? Now that's funny! Good luck with that.

 

[sr71plt]

Sooooo you'll continue to argue and insist on having the last word until everyone agrees with you? Now that's funny! Good luck with that.

Well, no, it looks like that's what you were trying to do.

Funny thing about that "last word" Internet game. It's a lose/lose. Whenever you point out that someone else has to have the last word, it's you trying to have the last word.

And now it's your turn to go for it again. Or, not, if you can resist.

You could have just let it go, as Emerson suggested. But you didn't. You've already lost that game.

 

[Emerson40]

Hey Em.

Hey LadyVer!

 

[LadyVer]

Hey LadyVer!

 

[akatrex]

Well, think about it. The OP is tooling around on a porn discussion board and upset about his wife being open about sexuality in her remarks to him. At the minimum he's being hypocritical. It sounds most like she's trying to get his briefs out of a twist and to pay at least as much attention to her as he's expending on Internet porn sites.

And it sounds a bit like you are hypocritical too, Bunny. (For one thing, I don't include "slut" in my account name and then go all prissy on a porn discussion board.)

What I see in the OP is a wife struggling to get her husband to get his nose out of Internet porn and pay attention to her. I sort of wonder how this thread would have gone if she'd been the one to post the dilemma--with her picking and choosing what the scene is.

It sounds most like she's trying to get his briefs out of a twist and to pay at least as much attention to her as he's expending on Internet porn sites.


sr71plt
Literotica Guru
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Mid-Atlantic, USA
Posts: 27,578

vs.

akatrex
Literotica Guru
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: MOA @ 1000
Posts: 1,933


Unfortunately Skunk Works has not done his Forensic Home Work to find out that 99% of my posts are on the General Board. Rarely on the” How To” Board.

 

[sr71plt]

I'm not the one whining about my wife on a porn board, dude. Also, I don't see where most of your posts being on the GB means anything in this context--or that I've posted a lot more to Literotica than you have. You're the one who brought a "I can't figure out why my wife is making these sexual comments to me in private" issue to an open sex discussion board rather than talking to her about it. (Can I hear you say "duh"?)

You know this just could have stopped. You've gotten sorts of "she's trying to tell you something, dude" comments/questions from a bunch of posters beyond your gangbanging fan club that you don't seem able to absorb. If she says such things when she's drunk, they are things she hasn't felt she could talk to you about sober. Get off the damn Internet porn board and go talk to her.

If ya'all don't want me to post to this thread, don't challenge me to post.

It's been a really amusing thread; all sorts of Internet discussion board games going on.

 

[lovecraft68]

OK, I'm game. What part of the OP wasn't about sex? It was a guy complaining about his wife's sex talk in private by talking about his wife and her sex talk on an open sex web site.

Absolutely hilarious. And you all sucked into Internet unreality #32--accepting the perspective of a poster just because he posted.

What I see in the OP is a wife struggling to get her husband to get his nose out of Internet porn and pay attention to her. I sort of wonder how this thread would have gone if she'd been the one to post the dilemma--with her picking and choosing what the scene is.

This is a free speech site meaning people can discuss anything they would like and many threads here in the How to forum are about serious real life issues.

The fact the site is anon actually helps people come ask these questions. Its easier than bringing this up to a friend or relative and I have seen good advice given on not only this thread, but many others.

Now what I really see is you as always trying to make this thread revolve around you and what YOU think.

You expressed your opinion as others have, but unlike many others you have to now try to beat everyone into thinking yours is the only one that matters.

I enjoy seeing you called out for the self centered boob you are.

 

[lovecraft68]

To the OP.

I will say that I believe your wife's issue may simply be with alcohol.

Yes, alcohol loosens the tongue and inhibitions and if she is being hurtful when she is intoxicated then she has some deep seated issues and they may be with herself as much as you.

I'd say communication and honest communication is the only thing that will work and not just between you, but involving a marriage Councillor.

if she refuses to acknowledge any problem(and addicts of any kind never do) you are going to have to decide what is best for you as an individual.

 

[silverwhisper]

akatrex quoth:
unfortunately skunk works has not done his forensic home work to find out that 99% of my posts are on the general board. rarely on the ”how to” board.

shush, you're using logic. it doesn't like that.

well, OK: it just doesn't understand that.

akatrex, what with all the attention whoring by whatitsface, your actual conversation has gotten lost in the shuffle. that's what attention whores like to do, though. so has anything here sounded relevant or useful?

ed

 

[sr71plt]

Since you all are taking this so well, I might also suggest that if the OP does decide to talk with his wife rather than to the world, he might not want to tell her that he aired her dirty linen on a porn Web site's open discussion board before talking to her about it.

(Don't mind Lovecraft. He's obsessed with me.)