Yo mama is........(the playful insult thread)

[ABSTRUSE]

Your mama is so fat, she puts mayo on asprin.

I asked what she wanted on her hamburer, she said "A hotdog!"

 

[Guest]

Yo mama is yo sister!

 

[alyxen]

Yo momma's so poor, saw her kickin' a can down the street. Asked her what she was doin. She said, 'Movin!.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Yo mama is yo sister!

OOOOOOhhhhhhh girl, that was good. I was trying to figure out why my sister kept calling me auntie.

 

[Guest]

Yo mama's so fat when she backs up, she beeps.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Yo Mama’s is so fat the shadow of her ass weighs 50 pounds.

Yo mama's so big, when she bent down to tie her shoes, her face got burnt from re-entry.

Yo momma’s so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!

Yo momma’s so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

Yo momma’s so poor she can't afford to pay attention!

Yo momma’s so fat she fell in love and broke it

Yo momma’s so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.

Yo momma’s so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!

Yo momma’s so stupid she uses a Dan Quayle spell checker.

Yo momma's so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world.

Yo Daddy is so old he has to stick his dick in the freezer to get hard.

[ Yo Mama jokes courtesy of Cal ]

 

[R. Richard]

An interesting thread.

The game you are playing here is a SOMEWHAT more literate version of a game played by young black males. The game was called 'The Dozens.' The game consisted of ritual insults, frequently involving 'yo momma,' designed to desensitise the young black male to the world in which he was forced to live. If he were to respond with anger, he would typically be beaten or killed by the white man/white police.

I grew up in the streets of inner cities. I watched young black men have to 'fall in.' That is, they would go out to the street corners of new neighborhoods to find out what they could and could not do. If a young dude did not 'fall in,' he was in danger of being lynched.

If you wonder how a white male survived in such an environment, don't. Some of my survival techniques have no statute of limitations.
R. Richard

 

[Clare Quilty]

Yo mama is so fat, the bitch sweats gravy.

Yo mama is so fat, Richard Simmons was like, "Oh ... my ... gawd, You are one huge bitch."

Yo mama is so fat, she routinely refers to Star Jones as, "that skinny heifer."

 

[Clare Quilty]

... The game consisted of ritual insults, frequently involving 'yo momma,' designed to desensitise the young black male to the world in which he was forced to live. If he were to respond with anger, he would typically be beaten or killed by the white man/white police....

If you wonder how a white male survived in such an environment, don't. Some of my survival techniques have no statute of limitations.
R. Richard

Hiding in your trailer watching Star Trek reruns and concocting bizarre half-baked socio-anthropological theories is so serious a crime that it has no statute of limitations? That seems a little harsh.

 

[Rusty914]

Your Mom's so ugly, she gets less action than a white guy in the NBA.

 

[Guest]

 

[seasparks]

Yo mama's so dumb, when she saw a sign that said "Wet Floor." she did.

Yo mama's so ugly that her delivery room nurse is still throwing up.

Yo Mama's such a bitch that she wears a flea collar.

To quote George Carlin...

"So you wanna play the dozens.
Well the dozens is a game.
But the way I fucked your mother is a goddamn shame."

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!

Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!

Yo mama so stupid she jumped out the window and went up.

Yo mama so stupid she put lipstick on her forehead, talking about she was trying to makeup her mind.

Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!

~lucky

 

[SnoopDog]

Yo mama's so old, I asked her to act her age and she dropped dead.

Snoopy, great thread, amde me laugh hard

 

[Guest]

 

[smutpen]

Your mama's so ugly you gotta hang a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her.

Though it's not in the approved format, I think the funniest "ugly" one-liner I ever heard was from Redd Foxx on "Sanford and Son."

He told Aunt Esther, "You look like a gorilla suckin' on a lemon."

 

[Clare Quilty]

I think the funniest "ugly" one-liner I ever heard was from Redd Foxx on "Sanford and Son."

I would have to opt for Gorilla Cookies


Uglysicles is also funny as hell.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Yo mama's so dumb!
When someone cried "Look, a dead bird!"
She looked UP!