You're married?!?!!

[Silverluna]

Ye Gawds

Lord and Lady of Light!


Wookiee...geez...I *did not* mean to point any fingers....I just was venting my past frustrations....

Again...It is not my wish to create a black list...or anything....*curls up in her little ball and sleeps*

 

[cymbidia]

Re: Re: Just so the world knows

Same here....except I like to expose myself in shopping malls....but only during Christmas season...

Same here, except i like to take awkward Lit moments and try to defuse them - oh and i like a little "sensation play" (as we call it in the BDSM Forum) with my lovin', too.

 

[Ice Cold]

I think I might be allergic to marriage.

But anytime I was involved in a relationship, I made it known to the people I talk to online.

 

[nzwookie]

Re: Ye Gawds

Lord and Lady of Light!


Wookiee...geez...I *did not* mean to point any fingers....I just was venting my past frustrations....

Again...It is not my wish to create a black list...or anything....*curls up in her little ball and sleeps*

When the pointing finger of guilt pokes you square in the eye it becomes a neccessity to be open and honest.....something I have always been......

If im lying im dieing.....http://www.plaudersmilies.de/rough/schuss.gif

 

[MissTaken]

Being married or otherwise attached and flirting is a personal choice. No problem there.


Not telling someone you are attached is very unfair to the person you are flirting with. I have found that being upfront and concrete on line has been the most effective way to make the sorts of friends and yes, lovers I would like to have.


There is great disappointment when flirting and liking someone on line leads to the great "I am married" line. It is very hurtful.

Well, that is just my opinion. Having learned from a number of experiences, I dont' really become attached to anyone until I meet them in real time or at the very least, share hours and days of phone conversations.

 

[nakedangelina]

I think I might be allergic to marriage.


OMG!! Thank you, Ice, you just explained it to me, I MUST be allergic to marriage!!! Living in sin, however, does not irritate me at all.

Not married, don't want to be married. Not even involved with anyone - male or female - how fucking pathetic is that???

 

[freakygirl]

I think the only time this information (or lack of) would piss me off... Is if we had spent a long time getting to know each other and finally met..

Like in some seedy hotel in Detroit.. banging like bunnies on the vibrating bed... laying there afterwards.. with that after sex glow sharing a cigarette. S/he pipes up.. "Shit.. I gotta get going. My wife (husband) wanted me to pick up milk"


Anything else.. online is a fantasy to me. I'm an equal opportunity flirter.. But then again, I'm not here looking for "love". I'm content with my boyfriend.. I'm here to kill time between housework and sleeping

 

[missy2]

Happily married 18 years!
Looking at weiners and flirting are still fun.
Looking & flirting OK for hubby too.
Lots of love and trust...............and facesitting!!
WOOHOO!!
We're in it for the long haul.We're always there for each other.

 

[Cara_f_32]

I agree

What i don't understand are those people who are married but deny it over and over again for months?

I find that to be the most cruel thing online that can happen. Really makes you question everyone after that.....

 

[Reverie]

Personally, I want to know right up front whether someone is married or not. I make it a rule NEVER to flirt with or cyber with someone who is married, it just isn't worth it to me. I've had bad experiences.

Can't people put it in their profiles? It would save a lot of time and trouble for everyone involved. I think the majority of people at lit are open and honest about their marital status, however I don't always read every single post ever written by every member and occasionally miss the mentioning of wives, so it would be nice if in a persons BIO they said: MARRIED.

And for those of you that ARE lying about your marital status:GROW UP! Stop playing games with people. The lies will eventually come back to bite you in the butt and even if they don't you run the chance of causing over people, who may become attached to you, pain when they discover you're a great bit liar.

Okay, my rant is over. Go about your business

 

[Ezarc]

*Runs up, hugs Reverie, smiles, winks, and runs away*
Take Care and Lust Always,
Ezarc
another victim falls to a hug attack

 

[nzwookie]

Can't people put it in their profiles? It would save a lot of time and trouble for everyone involved. I think the majority of people at lit are open and honest about their marital status, however I don't always read every single post ever written by every member and occasionally miss the mentioning of wives, so it would be nice if in a persons BIO they said: MARRIED.

[/B]

As stated earlier.................It is in my profile when I update it....But it does not show up when you open the profile from the boards........I dont know why.........does anyone ??

 

[joolushko]

Re: grrr...

I *always* say that I'm married. Lots of people don't want to "waste time" on married people, and that's their right. I sure as hell don't blame them.

I find that to be so true. I am married and when I am having a great conversation with someone. Not a lets go off and have sex conversation but just a general conversation that I am enjoying, they freak out and ignore me when they find out I am married. I never said that I was going to date the person. I find nothing wrong with just talking. Hell, my husband would be happier if I flirted more. He is a terrible flirt and feels guilty that I don't flirt as much as he does.

http://www.plaudersmilies.de/natur/sunny.gif

 

[bluntforcemama]

Oh, Luna... have I got a thread for you.

http://www.literotica.com/forum/showthread.php?threadid=38393

http://www.literotica.com/forum/showthread.php?threadid=38410

 

[Reverie]

As stated earlier.................It is in my profile when I update it....But it does not show up when you open the profile from the boards........I dont know why.........does anyone ??

That seems really odd. I know NOTHING about computers so I would be no help with this probably. You are updating your profile for the bulletin boards right, not your profile on the main story site, which is a bit different? All I know is that I go to the top of the page here on the boards, click on control panel, go to edit profile and scroll down to intrests or bio or whatever and add any information that you want. I've never had a problem with it, and I change mine regularly.

I think the profile page is VERY underutilized here at lit. Most of the time when I look up someone's profile, very little is filled out. I know people shouldn't put out extremly personal information on the net for all the weirdos to see but is it too much to ask to put in your age (or just the decade to which you belong:30's) or information like that your married? I don't think anyone will be able to track you down in real life simply because you listed your approximate age or marital status.

 

[gothedistance]

Not married any more, no relationship, no life, need hug...

 

[Reverie]

Come here and let me wrap my arms around you...poor baby

 

[gothedistance]

Thanks
Just the knowledge that someone out there wants to hug you makes all the difference.

 

[nzwookie]

I think the profile page is VERY underutilized here at lit. Most of the time when I look up someone's profile, very little is filled out. I know people shouldn't put out extremly personal information on the net for all the weirdos to see but is it too much to ask to put in your age (or just the decade to which you belong:30's) or information like that your married? I don't think anyone will be able to track you down in real life simply because you listed your approximate age or marital status.

Thanks for the info Reverie......Your point about the lack of use of the profile pages is also very well made.. Mine is used but most of the ones I look at tell me nothing..

 

[Firesprite]

The flipside....

While I agree that when you are getting into deep and meaningful and seem to be on the way to becoming friends (or more) it is polite to tell the other person your marital status, is it really necessary for casual flirting?

I am not married. I am not attached. I am a flirt. I am a virgin.

I treat my virginity as other people treat their Marriage status. If it becomes important to the continuing or budding of the friendship, I will tell them with no shame. Mostly people are good about it.. surprised, interested, whatever. Occasionally I've had reponses along the lines of "you're not worth knowing because with you I'll never get laid" And frankly, goodbye and good riddance to them.

Casual and sexual banter is fun. It is an outlet for me. My collection of vibs, books and vids do part of the job, the other part is done by the flirting here.. semi-sexual satisfaction.. the experience mostly in the mind rather than in the body.

I cant claim to speak for the married people here but perhaps flirting is an outlet of sorts for them too.. an ego boost perhaps.

My sexual activities and my virginity may seem contradictory to many people, but then my reasons for drawing the line where I do are mine. One day I will meet Mr Right and I'm gonna go for it like a rabbit, but till then... tongues only.

I just realised I was wandering away from the point.

My point is: Provided the relationship stays on the flirting footing and doesn't progress into the heart to heart friendship, I see nothing wrong with not mentioning certain parts of life.

(can you see the conversations if we didn't leave some things out?:
Guy: Hi honey
Girl: Hi hotlips
Guy: oh yeah sorry about that, I've a coldsore )

 

[WhiteRose]

The flipside....

While I agree that when you are getting into deep and meaningful and seem to be on the way to becoming friends (or more) it is polite to tell the other person your marital status, is it really necessary for casual flirting?...

Everything you said in your post was about YOU. Maybe you don't know how the other person is starting to feel about you. Just because you're only flirting doesn't always mean the other person doesn't feel more and they could end up getting very hurt. Maybe they're looking for something that you aren't ready to give them, only they don't understand why because you haven't been honest with them, so they're thinking, "There's a chance." How fair is that to them?

 

[Bluesboy2]

Y'all have made some good points

Because of that I went to my profile and edited it to show my current status. Myself I will flirt with any female that flirts back. Its my nature. But that doesnt mean Im gonna actually persue them. I just like to make people smile. Is that a bad thing?

 

[Guest]

Everything you said in your post was about YOU. Maybe you don't know how the other person is starting to feel about you. Just because you're only flirting doesn't always mean the other person doesn't feel more and they could end up getting very hurt. Maybe they're looking for something that you aren't ready to give them, only they don't understand why because you haven't been honest with them, so they're thinking, "There's a chance." How fair is that to them?

This woman speaks the truth. I have been on both sides of this issue and I am now much more careful, open, and understanding because I know how it feels to feel more for someone and to feel less. I hope that makes sense.

 

[spinnaker]

I'm also married and I make it clear. And I usually seek those who accept it or other marrieds for pleasure. People should be up front about their situations---sneaky is cruel! Good luck to you all!

 

[punkrockpoet]

whats the problem of just flirting with someone if you're married?

if there is little likelyhood of an actual encounter, then where is the harm of coming on to someone? its fun and it does well for one's self-esteem.