oh yeah, i definitely agree. its often a lot easier said than done. but i feel like when other people mirror that positive energy and can empathize it creates an environment to slowly make those changes. you got this. i mean, im constantly trying, @MiaBabe23 gets frustrated with me on at least a daily basis because i won't submit
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Oh @HollyS , I appreciate your statement about the difficulty in expressing your dilemma about people pleasing and intimacy. It's obvious you've put a lot of thought into this over time. You deserve credit for speaking about this publicly, and that makes you brave in my book.Okay, I'll try.
I came up with a bunch for work, which I suspect a lot of people have, lol.
But the one I want to work on is hard for me to articulate. It's based on the feeling that I'm not good at relationships. Of course, that's a pretty big umbrella, so I've been trying to narrow it down.
The one I'd like to address is that I'm such a people-pleaser by nature that I lose track of myself. This, in turn, makes me feel like I don't know how to be truly intimate, because you have to know yourself to give yourself to someone.
Makes me feel crazy sometimes.
So, my self talk is to believe in myself, and stop trying to please.
Holy shit, that was way TMI.
I'm hoping you share it with us... Maybe I can better myself, vicariously, through you!Hallooooo!!
How are the courtiers today?
I think I thought of something for the Queen's challenge, but I'll wait til more people are around, I think. Or I might keep it to myself?!? IDK!
Back to the lab for your trusty Alchemist. Still more whine than gold at hand!
I second and agree with EVERY SINGLE THING you said...Oh @HollyS , I appreciate your statement about the difficulty in expressing your dilemma about people pleasing and intimacy. It's obvious you've put a lot of thought into this over time. You deserve credit for speaking about this publicly, and that makes you brave in my book.
I've struggled with issues similar to yours for most of my life and have been severely heartbroken more than once. At one point, I felt my heart had been ripped out of my soul and I vowed not to let that happen again. I was in a dark place, but over time my vow softened and I feel at peace with my life.
I don't feel qualified to give you any relationship advice. There might be some deep seated fears lurking within you, but only you know about that. But I can tell from your postings that you are a kind, articulate, thoughtful, fun loving, stylish, intelligent, witty, responsible, curious, and friendly person. These are indeed noble attributes and the world is a better place because you are here.
DeeDee
Ooh do share with us, trusty Alchemist!Hallooooo!!
How are the courtiers today?
I think I thought of something for the Queen's challenge, but I'll wait til more people are around, I think. Or I might keep it to myself?!? IDK!
Back to the lab for your trusty Alchemist. Still more whine than gold at hand!
That’s fantastic!Just got back from work. The positive self-talk seemed to have worked for me so I'm pretty happy about that, although I'm absolutely exhausted. It's been one hell of a day
I just found this post... I'm running through my ass, busy today, but I will find an old post or two of mine to share my "unsolicited two cents" with you, regarding a similar phase of life I went through...Okay, I'll try.
I came up with a bunch for work, which I suspect a lot of people have, lol.
But the one I want to work on is hard for me to articulate. It's based on the feeling that I'm not good at relationships. Of course, that's a pretty big umbrella, so I've been trying to narrow it down.
The one I'd like to address is that I'm such a people-pleaser by nature that I lose track of myself. This, in turn, makes me feel like I don't know how to be truly intimate, because you have to know yourself to give yourself to someone.
Makes me feel crazy sometimes.
So, my self talk is to believe in myself, and stop trying to please.
Holy shit, that was way TMI.
That’s a really great goal, Holly, and such great self-awarenessOkay, I'll try.
I came up with a bunch for work, which I suspect a lot of people have, lol.
But the one I want to work on is hard for me to articulate. It's based on the feeling that I'm not good at relationships. Of course, that's a pretty big umbrella, so I've been trying to narrow it down.
The one I'd like to address is that I'm such a people-pleaser by nature that I lose track of myself. This, in turn, makes me feel like I don't know how to be truly intimate, because you have to know yourself to give yourself to someone.
Makes me feel crazy sometimes.
So, my self talk is to believe in myself, and stop trying to please.
Holy shit, that was way TMI.
* smirks * If you don’t want to know the joy of that submission, only you who loses out, wavering Guardsmanoh yeah, i definitely agree. its often a lot easier said than done. but i feel like when other people mirror that positive energy and can empathize it creates an environment to slowly make those changes. you got this. i mean, im constantly trying, @MiaBabe23 gets frustrated with me on at least a daily basis because i won't submit
I couldn't have said it better myself!
this feels more like a veiled threat to me
...it could be a veiled ticket to paradise!this feels more like a veiled threat to me
Are you saying, "Don't threaten me with a good time?!?" Lolthis feels more like a veiled threat to me
im just no fun apparently, haha. although, i certainly enjoy a good time. i think there is just a lot of hang ups on my part that wouldnt allow me to enjoy it.Are you saying, "Don't threaten me with a good time?!?" Lol
You really don't know what you're missing, having experienced both.
Are you saying, "Don't threaten me with a good time?!?" Lol
You really don't know what you're missing, having experienced both.
I’m just teasing, of course
i have no doubt, connection is everything, chemistry can mean so much...just one of those things that is engrained in me, like sexuality.
