BDSM Discussion: Do's and Don'ts

[gracie920101]

Couldn't resist.

 

[gracie920101]

What are your top 3 Do's and Don'ts of kink? How would you best describe your personal philosophy/style of BDSM and why? I'm not looking for the rules we should all know (i.e. consent, communication, etc.) but your individual outlook, lessons learned etc. Do these include your limits? How did you learn these things about yourself? Do you wish you'd had these guideposts earlier? How have these evolved over time?

oh God! I wish I would have had guideposts! In the days before the internet, this really wasn't something you could find in Encyclopedia Britannica. This was stuff in "dirty magazines" that was under the mattress of the uncle you were always warned about. Or if you could get your hands on a Penthouse Forum....oh man, jackpot! It was a wealth of information to a white bread girl like me. But I think of all those stories I passed over about spanking and really wish I could go back to them. I just didn't get anything from those, at the time. LOL, now those are my go to after a good bondage article or story with a little SM thrown in, of course.

I learned early on that a few things were on my "ick" list but it took a 3 year affair with a man who was learning domination to solidify my list. I was his first sub but we were both in LTR so it was only on a hit or miss basis when we could meet up. I learned a lot about the gentle side of the lifestyle in the bedroom only with him but I craved a harsher style so we eventually faded out.

I would say most of my do's and don'ts are really just tied to my limits. I won't go into those here because those are defined between J and myself. I could list some broad limits that seem to be pretty universal on here but more information than that is kept here at home as a shield against vulnerability, if that makes any sense.

Thanks PLP for facilitating the interaction on here. You are doing a super bang up job keeping all this info straight and we love you for it.

 

[AlwaysFara]

oh God! I wish I would have had guideposts! In the days before the internet, this really wasn't something you could find in Encyclopedia Britannica. This was stuff in "dirty magazines" that was under the mattress of the uncle you were always warned about. Or if you could get your hands on a Penthouse Forum....oh man, jackpot! It was a wealth of information to a white bread girl like me. But I think of all those stories I passed over about spanking and really wish I could go back to them. I just didn't get anything from those, at the time. LOL, now those are my go to after a good bondage article or story with a little SM thrown in, of course.

I learned early on that a few things were on my "ick" list but it took a 3 year affair with a man who was learning domination to solidify my list. I was his first sub but we were both in LTR so it was only on a hit or miss basis when we could meet up. I learned a lot about the gentle side of the lifestyle in the bedroom only with him but I craved a harsher style so we eventually faded out.

I would say most of my do's and don'ts are really just tied to my limits. I won't go into those here because those are defined between J and myself. I could list some broad limits that seem to be pretty universal on here but more information than that is kept here at home as a shield against vulnerability, if that makes any sense.

Thanks PLP for facilitating the interaction on here. You are doing a super bang up job keeping all this info straight and we love you for it.

Hey gurl.

We love you, too.

 

[gracie920101]

Hey gurl.

We love you, too.

Fara!