BDSM for Undergrads

[JMohegan]

Hi all! I'm 18, almost 19, a submissive, and I'm starting my sophomore year at a small liberal arts college in August. I discovered the lifestyle in January and was amazed to find that there were people who actually did the things I'd fantasized about since puberty ( ; Since then, I've been doing as much exploring as is possible online.

I'd like to get involved in the scene in real time, but it's rather difficult because when I'm at school I have no means of transportation, and when I'm home, I have to deal with overprotective parents. I've also been having problems with the types of people who have been contacting me on the BDSM personals site which I've joined. I sometimes get the feeling that a lot of the people who contact me just have a Lolita fetish and are only interested because of my age. Another problem I have is that some people seem to think that I can easily be manipulated because of my inexperience. My last and most frustrating problem is that I get the feeling that experienced Doms don't take me seriously. My youth seems to disqualify me from from being a "true" submissive.

Do any of you younger subs and Dom/mes out there have similar problems? What have your experiences in the BDSM world been like? Do you have any wisdom to share? Also, you older subs and Dom/mes, do you have any advice which you could dish out to us? I'd love to hear from anyone who feels like responding.

I'll cast my vote for something other than the BDSM group/club/munch/Internet personals scene.

Whatever appeals to you about "the lifestyle", start talking about this sort of thing with your peers. Friends from your home town, college, sport leagues, etc. Start slowly, and back off if they seem judgmental or rudely shocked. But you might be surprised to learn what's going on in the privacy of a dorm room right down the hall.

Sure, this may not be advanced-level play. But just like you, everyone starts somewhere.

The stuff I did and heard about in college three decades ago would be scoffed at by some as practically vanilla today. But you know what? The guy who confessed to restraining his girlfriend with necktie and belt after Winter Formal eventually became a wizard of ropework. And the one who loved spanking became a master with flogger and cane.

What I am suggesting is that you don't have to look outside your age group or peer group or locale to find kinky or kink-curious people.

With a little courage and effort in your own backyard, you just might find contacts for play, potential mates with similar goals for relationships, and strong friendships that can last a lifetime.

 

[myinnerslut]

I'm worried I'm going to have a lot of the same troubles when I get back to school. I share a room with two other girls and I already had a few veeeeery close calls last year, but managed to make up enough excuses that my roommates wouldn't think I was a complete freak (a fact I'd much prefer to reveal slowly ). My Dom and I recently did a big toy purchase and those things are going to impossible to explain away. (there are very other convincing uses for a bright pink butt plug...)

im actually lucky. im a sub. one of my quadmates is a sub. my roomate has domme tendancies. (this is going to be one intresting year). i keep all my toys in a drawer in my dresser.

as for having some "private time" in a dorm, we use the butterfly system. if someone draws a butterfly on the door, cheack back in ten minutes. if youabsolutly must get in the room, knock and wait a few minutes for the person inside to get presentable and open the door for you.