bf wants me to fuck other men

I think a lot of men do; sex just doesn't have the same emotional weight as most women attach to it...

Not being judgemental, I think it's a biological thing.

I realise I'm massively generalising as well.


I think you are only half right. Men are casual about the sex that they have but not when it comes to their wife or gf.
 
He views sex as being akin to an enjoyable conversation, so why not have sex with others. I just don't see it that way


If you do anything you would have to come to grips with whether or not he is really ok with you having sex with other men or he is just convincing himself of that because he wants to have sex with other women.

Even if you both have great outside partners he may find it harder to accept you promiscuity than he thinks. But the real test comes when he realizes that you can attract casual sex partners more easily than he can. How will he feel when you are on a date with another man while he sits at home alone?
 
I think my personality is incompatible with an open relationship. I love very intensely, and really just want that one person. I also don't think sex would feel as good to me if there wasn't that connection. He wants to have an open sexual relationship, but not an open emotional relationship. I just don't think I could have sex with someone and not fall in love with them. I don't think I can separate sex from emotions

I think it's time you went your separate ways...This seems to be twisting from..."you" fucking other men...to an "OPEN" relationship.

The simple fact that you're not Married...to him, their isn't a TRUE commitment.
 
Fantasies are great.... make up stories and exchange them. They can be as naughty or nice as you want.

But a lot of time, a fantasy should stay a fantasy! If he really is the "man of your dreams".... keep it that way. JMHO! :rose:
 
My boyfriend has told me that for the last several years, he has had fantasies of me fucking other men. He doesn't want to watch, or be part of it in anyway. He's also not into being humiliated. But he says he would love it, if I went out and fucked another man, and then came home and told him about it. Does anyone else share this kink?

I had thought that maybe this was his way of starting up an 'open relationship'. But when I told him that I would never give him "permission" to do the same thing, he said that's not what he wanted. If I did he'd totally go for it and would sleep with other women, but that if I didn't want him to then he wouldn't.

He just really seems to get turned on by the idea of me being a slut, and then coming home to him.


Run, don't walk away from him. If he really respected and loved you, I don't believe he'd ask you to do this. Would you really like to screw guys for the sake of screwing and then come home and tell him all about it so he could get his jollies off? If you have self respect, why would you do this?

I've seen people do this before and it routinely ends badly. Think of yourself.
 
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My boyfriend has told me that for the last several years, he has had fantasies of me fucking other men. He doesn't want to watch, or be part of it in anyway. He's also not into being humiliated. But he says he would love it, if I went out and fucked another man, and then came home and told him about it. Does anyone else share this kink?

I had thought that maybe this was his way of starting up an 'open relationship'. But when I told him that I would never give him "permission" to do the same thing, he said that's not what he wanted. If I did he'd totally go for it and would sleep with other women, but that if I didn't want him to then he wouldn't.

He just really seems to get turned on by the idea of me being a slut, and then coming home to him.

Tell him you did, and tell him you never knew what true satisfaction was before this experience. Then ask him why he can't perform up to those standards.
 
And it's that "emotional weight" about it in his woman's heart that a man who is a lover needs to honour and respect and value; that is exactly why for me, a total group sex fantasist from childhood, the way has to be monogamy: the woman I married needs that, and therefore it is my desire too. If that sounds too freakin honourable, well tough; it's the reality for a man who genuinely loves a woman.

I love this...

I know that he would accept not having an open relationship if I ultimately didn't want one. I think he is just hopeful, and I expect that it is something that will keep coming up. I think he believes that maybe one day I'll change my mind. But he's also said that if I don't, then that's fine, because we're partners. We almost broke up 2 years ago over this, but ultimately decided that our relationship had a lot of good things in it, and it seemed like a foolish thing to break up over. We just couldn't do it. Besides, couples are not 100% compatible all of the time. We're just not made that way.
 
As a man in an open marriage, let me just say that it isn't for everyone at all. We went through a monogamous phase, frankly because she needed that at the time, and then she asked to re-open it, and since I had only agreed to monogamy because she was emotionally invested in it, I was more than happy to re-open it at this juncture.

Nor is this solely about her. If it had been the reverse and I had wanted monogamy first, and then to re-open the marriage, she would have respected that, I believe. Why? Because open marriages only work if both partners are truly on board with it. Same with cuckolding and any other kind of sharing arrangement. Only if both parties are truly fine with it should be it pursued.

When one party wants monogamy and the other doesn't, then the one who doesn't want monogamy, myself at one point, has a choice to make. I made the same choice as simon, though it wasn't easy. Some guys can't make that sacrifice, and yes, for me, it was a sacrifice, but she had made plenty for me, so I made that one for her. When she asked me about it now and then, I told her frankly that I was only doing monogamy for her sake.

When she asked to re-open it, I was more than happy to do so.

For those men who can't make that sacrifice, however, I can understand. It wasn't easy for me, either. Sometimes, you're just not able to make it. Too much of an issue.

For my part, though, sticking it out has paid off. She trusts me now. Knows that I won't walk away from her like that. Now I have her and the open marriage, and I would have lost her if I had insisted on the latter at the time, or else made her terribly miserable....why, because she wasn't secure enough yet for it. Now she is.

Now we both know that monogamy isn't for either of us. And I can say this for a fact, having actually tried, but I can also honestly say that I did it for her...and for both of us. I had just to be patient and give her time.

And frankly, I'm just not the leavin' kind.
 
Early in our marriage my wife went out with former boyfriends a few times. She never told me what they did, but she always came home horny and ready to fuck. And I was waiting, hard and ready to fuck her.
 
I am sorry. Even though I am a man I just can't see this. I have had my share of one night stands and even NSA relationships but I just don't see open relationships working. Something is bound to break down and/or the boundaries get blurred or broken even in the best of relationships and one or both get hurt. Or the other person gets attached and that is even another story.
 
I am sorry. Even though I am a man I just can't see this. I have had my share of one night stands and even NSA relationships but I just don't see open relationships working. Something is bound to break down and/or the boundaries get blurred or broken even in the best of relationships and one or both get hurt. Or the other person gets attached and that is even another story.

Having been in an open marriage, I can agree with this. I think they can work but not 24/7. We tried and Jealousy reared it's head. We also watched three friends loose their marriage to it. All three times she left him for the other man!

KC
 
Well..

To be honest , it is erotic and very hot I think. I asked my ex wife to do it but not her bag of marbles. Since then we have parted ways but remain friends somewhat.
My girlfriend is more open to ertic sexy things and when I brought it up , a 3sum or her with and another guy...she said whaaaaaaaaat? Yes , I am serious. Since then after 8 years of dating she has had sex with 3 guys. Super nice men and we all are good friends.
 
Oh I brought it up to my hubs once and he had a hissy fit! Though I want a true 3way and not just me with another guy. He is straight.. But hey a girl had to ask. I find it really hot but I would want everyone to be involved not just one of us watching. I think If it is an all in then the chances people running off lessen. Plus if you doesn't set the rule that your partner can not have sex without you present; then is lessens the chances of an emotional connection that all parties are not a part of. Well that is my 2 cents.
 
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Having been in an open marriage, I can agree with this. I think they can work but not 24/7. We tried and Jealousy reared it's head. We also watched three friends loose their marriage to it. All three times she left him for the other man!

KC

Exactly. I think some couples can do it but the majority, no.
 
Having been in an open marriage, I can agree with this. I think they can work but not 24/7. We tried and Jealousy reared it's head. We also watched three friends loose their marriage to it. All three times she left him for the other man!

KC

Not sure what you mean by not 24/7. My marriage is an open one now and we're doing pretty well. But it isn't for everyone, naturally. You have to be willing to trust your partner as well as yourself. And to do so, you need to build up that trust first. And even then, some couples are just too jealous.
 
My boyfriend has told me that for the last several years, he has had fantasies of me fucking other men. He doesn't want to watch, or be part of it in anyway. He's also not into being humiliated. But he says he would love it, if I went out and fucked another man, and then came home and told him about it. Does anyone else share this kink?

I had thought that maybe this was his way of starting up an 'open relationship'. But when I told him that I would never give him "permission" to do the same thing, he said that's not what he wanted. If I did he'd totally go for it and would sleep with other women, but that if I didn't want him to then he wouldn't.

He just really seems to get turned on by the idea of me being a slut, and then coming home to him.

I've had the same feelings as your boyfriend with a past girlfriend. I felt exactly the same way with the exception that I'd have liked to watch and possibly participate. But I just really wanted to watch her body at the mercy of another man. I didn't desire any other women, nor was I seeking to gain a favor by allowing her to do it.

I think it has to do with sharing something that, by societies standards should never be shared. In Elizabethan Europe, a man being cuckolded would have been dishonorable and shameful and would have ruined his reputation. So the concept of "cheating" in this situation is a door that is allowed to be opened. Some men like the idea and some don't. I think it's as simple as that. The real question is whether or not you're willing to do it. And if you are, what are your limits? If you indulge him once, it could be a slippery slope with him wanting you to try new things with new guys at a rate you aren't comfortable with. Know what you'd be comfortable with, know what kind of guy you'd want to go for, your ideal situation; things to ensure the encounter is successful on all three parties, should you choose to do it.
 
well

i found the chick im with wants to try threesome mmf and ffm

we both are bi

im just wandering how do you go about it ?
 
well

i found the chick im with wants to try threesome mmf and ffm

we both are bi

im just wandering how do you go about it ?

Suggest Lit Personals is a good place to start. Craigslist is a bit scary and full of fakes but maybe. Adult personals are good as well.
 
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