Bi Married and closeted

[Burstplayer]

At 58 and married, just started my true Bi feelings within the last year so and acted on them 2x. Wife pegs me now and after a few times of sucking her dildo it became obvious to her I was at least curious. After about a year of worry and how she was going to feel, I finally admitted to her I was more than curious and actually was with 2 men. No blow up, no outward signs of anger or resentment. I was pleasantly shocked. Now, the only issue is how we're going to play as she won't allow solo play for me on my own. But at least I've been able to talk to someone and she accepted it. How much will be an entirely other matter...

 

[PFWilly]

At 58 and married, just started my true Bi feelings within the last year so and acted on them 2x. Wife pegs me now and after a few times of sucking her dildo it became obvious to her I was at least curious. After about a year of worry and how she was going to feel, I finally admitted to her I was more than curious and actually was with 2 men. No blow up, no outward signs of anger or resentment. I was pleasantly shocked. Now, the only issue is how we're going to play as she won't allow solo play for me on my own. But at least I've been able to talk to someone and she accepted it. How much will be an entirely other matter...

Envious, I am!

I’m quite a bit older, and my wife knew early in our budding relationship that I had a few sexual experiences with other guys. She had no problem, at all, knowing that. After we got hitched, I had a few more experiences with one particular guy, she knew about those experiences. And frankly loved hearing about those activities during our pillow talk. She enjoyed it…a lot. LOL.

But life changed, family things, careers, etc, etc. Many years later, I retired early for health reasons, and had a few more encounters with other men. She still likes to hear about my youthful endeavors, but gives subtle messages that she would not approve of more adventures. A little frustrating, but it is the reality now. I’ve had a couple of encounters, but reluctant to share with her now.

Like I said, envious! Enjoy it whatever happens.

 

[easyoff]

I always swallow, unless he wants a snowball

 

[Lovetobebi99]

It could be the perfect situation or the road to ruin depending on how you handle it.

Here's what I would do. I'd subtly reciprocate the perceived advances.

If that goes right, I'd suggest becoming running buddies, or whatever makes sense.

Feel it out kinda like you said until there was no doubt that anything was misconstrued. Whether that is making out, jacking together, or even just a conversation laying things out.

At that point, a conversation with your wife needs to be had.

I suspect that if he is bi, that his wife knows and knows he's hitting on you. Otherwise he wouldn't be as forward with his subtle advances.

If that's the case and everyone is friends your wife has a guide and friend to navigating her new bi husband.

Now you get live the fantasy. You get to have your male lover without the fear of being caught cheating.

It'll just be the new normal. Maybe even a hot bi orgy with the wives participating?

If you start seeing him behind her back, you'll regret it one way or the other and it will absolutely ruin parts of your life.

It wouldn't even be the worst idea to have that conversation with your wife before yall all hang out again.

Just lay it out, I've had these thoughts, now our new friend seems to be making advances and I like it and would like to pursue something, what are your thoughts?

How cool would it be if she was like "I know, yes he is making advances, I know about it and have been waiting for this moment because I'm here for it all"

Thanks a lot, all makes good sense - but sadly my reality is that it’s 100% certain my wife would not approve and would leave me if she even thought I’d entertain the idea of sex with this guy, or any guy. If his wife does know then that complicates too. I’m highly tempted to go for a run with him

It could be the perfect situation or the road to ruin depending on how you handle it.

Here's what I would do. I'd subtly reciprocate the perceived advances.

If that goes right, I'd suggest becoming running buddies, or whatever makes sense.

Feel it out kinda like you said until there was no doubt that anything was misconstrued. Whether that is making out, jacking together, or even just a conversation laying things out.

At that point, a conversation with your wife needs to be had.

I suspect that if he is bi, that his wife knows and knows he's hitting on you. Otherwise he wouldn't be as forward with his subtle advances.

If that's the case and everyone is friends your wife has a guide and friend to navigating her new bi husband.

Now you get live the fantasy. You get to have your male lover without the fear of being caught cheating.

It'll just be the new normal. Maybe even a hot bi orgy with the wives participating?

If you start seeing him behind her back, you'll regret it one way or the other and it will absolutely ruin parts of your life.

It wouldn't even be the worst idea to have that conversation with your wife before yall all hang out again.

Just lay it out, I've had these thoughts, now our new friend seems to be making advances and I like it and would like to pursue something, what are your thoughts?

How cool would it be if she was like "I know, yes he is making advances, I know about it and have been waiting for this moment because I'm here for it all"

Hi

It could be the perfect situation or the road to ruin depending on how you handle it.

Here's what I would do. I'd subtly reciprocate the perceived advances.

If that goes right, I'd suggest becoming running buddies, or whatever makes sense.

Feel it out kinda like you said until there was no doubt that anything was misconstrued. Whether that is making out, jacking together, or even just a conversation laying things out.

At that point, a conversation with your wife needs to be had.

I suspect that if he is bi, that his wife knows and knows he's hitting on you. Otherwise he wouldn't be as forward with his subtle advances.

If that's the case and everyone is friends your wife has a guide and friend to navigating her new bi husband.

Now you get live the fantasy. You get to have your male lover without the fear of being caught cheating.

It'll just be the new normal. Maybe even a hot bi orgy with the wives participating?

If you start seeing him behind her back, you'll regret it one way or the other and it will absolutely ruin parts of your life.

It wouldn't even be the worst idea to have that conversation with your wife before yall all hang out again.

Just lay it out, I've had these thoughts, now our new friend seems to be making advances and I like it and would like to pursue something, what are your thoughts?

How cool would it be if she was like "I know, yes he is making advances, I know about it and have been waiting for this moment because I'm here for it all"

Hi, thanks a lot for the sound advice. Sadly I 100% know my wife wouldn’t approve and indeed would leave me at suggestion of me doing anything with another guy. If his wife does know that complicates too. I’m still tempted to go for a run with him and / or to subtly reciprocate his touches or allow them to linger sometime… I’m pretty sure something will happen if I open the door a little one time x

 

[Dreamer110]

I’ve got a dilemma at the moment… I’m so very bi and fantasise about so many gay experiences, but am married so it’s hard… recently me and my wife have become good friends with a couple through her work, and I’ve become aware that the guy is incredibly tactile with me in a way that makes me pretty sure he’s got sexual intentions - at first I thought it was just his way, but I now expect him to stroke my back, touch my arse, squeeze my thigh, it’s subtle but not so subtle every time. I think if I wasn’t bi I’d have objected by now. I kind of move away, but I kind of don’t. I’ve started fantasising about the next time we meet and reciprocating, and maybe going for a run together and showering after, or any number of scenarios where we become secret fuck buddies… the question is, do I take the plunge… it could be the most amazing thing ever - two married guys with a gay lover to live out those pent-up urges - or a Pandora’s box road to ruin…

Secret fuck buddies. I like the sound of that.

 

[markmecurious]

Glad your here. Im about the same. I however secretly engage in some man play time to time. But trying to just stick to fantasy. Love getting on here and chatting about my busexual urges. Cock is like a drug to me. Once I had a fix, I keep wanting more

That is where I am at presently. Wife does not know and need to keep it that way but on occasion get to live out my desires to suck a cock. Glad to learn I am not alone

 

[Terrylipstick]

That is where I am at presently. Wife does not know and need to keep it that way but on occasion get to live out my desires to suck a cock. Glad to learn I am not alone

You are most definitely not alone….

 

[markmecurious]

The hard part is finding someone close by to experiment and be discreet

Exactly

 

[OldSoldier96]

It would be a VERY long drive, I moved from Syracuse, NY to North Carolina 12 years ago.

Wish I was still stationed in Carolina.

 

[jimmyturtleman]

That is where I am at presently. Wife does not know and need to keep it that way but on occasion get to live out my desires to suck a cock. Glad to learn I am not alone

Welcome to the club. There are more of 'us' than you might think. I was surely surprised by how many bi guys are out there.

 

[saintcero]

Welcome to the club. There are more of 'us' than you might think. I was surely surprised by how many bi guys are out there.

Lit and SilverDaddies normalized my M2M urges and showed me that I am not alone. The people on the two sites have helped me a lot.

 

[jimmyturtleman]

Exactly. We have travelled along the same paths, Lit and SilverDaddies. They have made me realize I am not alone.

 

[luv23way]

I believe that bisexuality among men has become more open, more acceptable…but not like it is with women! Aging, porn, the number of opportunities …think it’s even more commonplace as we age. However, disclosure at 69 is not something that I plan on, even though I think about it all the time. Can’t even imagine the weeping and gnashing of teeth that would cause!

 

[OlderBtm4U]

Exactly. We have travelled along the same paths, Lit and SilverDaddies. They have made me realize I am not alone.

And the old CL.

 

[jimmyturtleman]

And the old CL.

"If you build it, they will cum."

 

[luv23way]

"If you build it, they will cum."

It was so easy to find a cock to suck

 

[jimmyturtleman]

It was so easy to find a cock to suck

Our only limits are the ones we place on ourselves.

 

[luv23way]

Our only limits are the ones we place on ourselves.

Well, I suppose we just choose to allow others to place limits on us…because most of us have limits

 

[redwon]

Most definitely closeted .
If she found out she'd ruin me both financially and personally.

 

[Burstplayer]

At 58 and married, just started my true Bi feelings within the last year so and acted on them 2x. Wife pegs me now and after a few times of sucking her dildo it became obvious to her I was at least curious. After about a year of worry and how she was going to feel, I finally admitted to her I was more than curious and actually was with 2 men. No blow up, no outward signs of anger or resentment. I was pleasantly shocked. Now, the only issue is how we're going to play as she won't allow solo play for me on my own. But at least I've been able to talk to someone and she accepted it. How much will be an entirely other matter...

As a postscript to this post now almost 4 months later, I'd have to say, although it was a relief to come out to her, it really hasn't gone as I had hoped. The worry is gone, but the lack of true acceptance to play isn't there and not discussed at all. In fact, we've now stopped pegging due to how it makes it very apparent to her that it turns me on and satisfies me in ways that she can't with her mouth or vagina. I actually stopped for HER, without her saying it. Knowing she doesn't want to play, and although a willing participant in pegging, and isn't really into seeing me get that kind of anal pleasure, made it much easier to just halt it.

In essence, I'm back in the closet, but the wife knows my feelings. I can't play with her, but I have to scratch the itch at times. It might not be worth the risk in coming out unless you pretty much know you've got a partner willing to fully accept you. I don't..

 

[OlderBtm4U]

Thanks for the update

 

[luv23way]

As a postscript to this post now almost 4 months later, I'd have to say, although it was a relief to come out to her, it really hasn't gone as I had hoped. The worry is gone, but the lack of true acceptance to play isn't there and not discussed at all. In fact, we've now stopped pegging due to how it makes it very apparent to her that it turns me on and satisfies me in ways that she can't with her mouth or vagina. I actually stopped for HER, without her saying it. Knowing she doesn't want to play, and although a willing participant in pegging, and isn't really into seeing me get that kind of anal pleasure, made it much easier to just halt it.

In essence, I'm back in the closet, but the wife knows my feelings. I can't play with her, but I have to scratch the itch at times. It might not be worth the risk in coming out unless you pretty much know you've got a partner willing to fully accept you. I don't..

I feel your pain After 50+ years together, she would feel so betrayed…even though it has nothing to do with not loving her. I enjoy crossdressing, and at times I enjoy sex with others…women or men. Fun, no strings sex parties where one can watch, or participate. Not for a minute do I believe it diminishes any facet of our relationship…but I know the reaction and for that reason I remain faithfully closeted

 

[OpenRoad_71]

I’ve got a dilemma at the moment… I’m so very bi and fantasise about so many gay experiences, but am married so it’s hard… recently me and my wife have become good friends with a couple through her work, and I’ve become aware that the guy is incredibly tactile with me in a way that makes me pretty sure he’s got sexual intentions - at first I thought it was just his way, but I now expect him to stroke my back, touch my arse, squeeze my thigh, it’s subtle but not so subtle every time. I think if I wasn’t bi I’d have objected by now. I kind of move away, but I kind of don’t. I’ve started fantasising about the next time we meet and reciprocating, and maybe going for a run together and showering after, or any number of scenarios where we become secret fuck buddies… the question is, do I take the plunge… it could be the most amazing thing ever - two married guys with a gay lover to live out those pent-up urges - or a Pandora’s box road to ruin…

Update please!!!

 

[FLuvsNipsnDicks]

Hi, MWF, 40… I just wanna say that I think the idea of all you married guys wanting to suck cock is so hot!! I swear there is nothing hotter than a mostly straight man on his knees with his lips wrapped around a nice fat dick! I personally haven’t gotten to witness it yet in real life, but I love to watch videos of guys playing and talking to guys like you about it. Keep sharing, fellas! I’ll be here for you…