Could we have some technique, please?

[snoozebutton]

I have found this to be quite an informative thread. With My limited r/l experience I have to admit I may be partial to not going far enough instead of too far. There is such a razors edge a Dom walks. Safe words are definately a must but I have noticed sometimes the pleasure gets so intense that you have to remind a woman to breath. Women can't always vocalize those making a safeword useless if can't be spoken. There are many journeys I wish to take with my sub and I will but I know it's better to take My time and do it right then to rush just because I haven't tried it. On a liter note where does a Dom learn to tie great knots was never a boy scout lol.

 

[MzChrista]

Actually Sam and others,

I am thinking that these are the situations that having a safe word is good for.

Caroline starts shouting and you ask, "Are you using the safe word, Caroline?"

You then, know whether or not to continue.

Now, what I want is an answer to this:

Doms?

It is your first time with a new sub.

She has agreed that she wants to engage in and has previously enjoyed nipple play.

What exactly do you do?

How do you proceed?

Exactly......

Oh Im all over this.
First I would put you in a chair (oh and I do mean YOU T, straight or not hahaha). Swivel chairs are cool for this scene. I would put cuffs on you and chain them together under the seat. You gonna feel like you can lift your hands but you cant.
Ill start with just my fingertips real light, just teasing and caressing, only barely going near the nipples at first. Gradually my touch would grow firmer and you would feel the first little bit of my fingernails dragging on your skin.
Then I might start to pay more attention to your nipples, little tugs rolling them between my fingers drawing them out.
Time for the clamps. I like the sliding ones for nipples, the ones with the chain between. I would slip them on you. not too tight. I would give you a few to get used to the feeling and then I would start combing caresses around your breasts with gentle tugs on the chain. One by one I would add clothespins around each breat in a circle, grabbing a little pinch of skin in each one. I might kiss you a little now, and blow softly on you where you starting to get sore.
Now depends how you are responding. If you are going deep on this I will tighten the nipple clamps and then hand some weights on them, just a little at a time to increase the pull. I have a kickass variation on this I might add, but Ill leave that alone for now.
First time together I will use a riding crop to flick the pins off one at a time. When we are more used to each other I might use the singletail, but that would likely make a newbie piss themselves.
When all the clips are off, I will get the horsehair flogger and use that for a bit, bring up the color till you (Oh remember T, Im talking about YOU) are a nice red. Important to remember that it seems like you want to rub the spot where the clips were but actually that makes them hurt longer.
If might bring you dont then, but if things are good I might slip the clamps off your nipples and go to a suede or deer flogger and work ya with that a while. When time to wind down I will get a rabbit fur and rub you up a bit and then repeat the first part in opposite order, from firm squeezes down to nice soft touches.

That what you wanted to know T?

 

[artful]

You nailed that one WD

It's not a natural thing to want to inflict pain on a person, for most of us anyway, especially being rough with a woman. I don't think it's anything that can be taught. It's one of those passageways a Dom has to tread by himself. Some of the things we do may appear to be very violent to an uninformed onlooker. Pulling of hair, nipple torture, all the different forms of corporal play. We aren't raised Dom, we're raised vanilla, and your taught to play nice and not hit little girls.

(Well, far to many grow up watching abuse, and copy that behavior, but that's not bdsm in my opinion)

In the beginning it's like having a little devil on one shoulder whispered "harder" and an angel on the other shouting "what are you doing?" Once you do silence the angel, you still have to develop technique of gradually taking her from one level to the next.

It's a lot easier, in my opinion, to be sub rather than Dom/me.

CLAP-CLAP-CLAP-CLAP-CLAP-CLAP-CLAP-CLAP-CLAP-CLAP

 

[Ebonyfire]

Oh Im all over this.
First I would put you in a chair (oh and I do mean YOU T, straight or not hahaha). Swivel chairs are cool for this scene. I would put cuffs on you and chain them together under the seat. You gonna feel like you can lift your hands but you cant.
Ill start with just my fingertips real light, just teasing and caressing, only barely going near the nipples at first. Gradually my touch would grow firmer and you would feel the first little bit of my fingernails dragging on your skin.
Then I might start to pay more attention to your nipples, little tugs rolling them between my fingers drawing them out.
Time for the clamps. I like the sliding ones for nipples, the ones with the chain between. I would slip them on you. not too tight. I would give you a few to get used to the feeling and then I would start combing caresses around your breasts with gentle tugs on the chain. One by one I would add clothespins around each breat in a circle, grabbing a little pinch of skin in each one. I might kiss you a little now, and blow softly on you where you starting to get sore.
Now depends how you are responding. If you are going deep on this I will tighten the nipple clamps and then hand some weights on them, just a little at a time to increase the pull. I have a kickass variation on this I might add, but Ill leave that alone for now.
First time together I will use a riding crop to flick the pins off one at a time. When we are more used to each other I might use the singletail, but that would likely make a newbie piss themselves.
When all the clips are off, I will get the horsehair flogger and use that for a bit, bring up the color till you (Oh remember T, Im talking about YOU) are a nice red. Important to remember that it seems like you want to rub the spot where the clips were but actually that makes them hurt longer.
If might bring you dont then, but if things are good I might slip the clamps off your nipples and go to a suede or deer flogger and work ya with that a while. When time to wind down I will get a rabbit fur and rub you up a bit and then repeat the first part in opposite order, from firm squeezes down to nice soft touches.

That what you wanted to know T?

Damn MzC! You paint one hell of a picture!

Eb

 

[Daedalus77]

Going back to advice fo new doms

When I play with a sub that is new to me to avoid saying "is that ok is that ok" I start with a stroke that is painful but will not mark and ask/say "you liked that didn't you". Then I keep turning up the pain asking/saying "you want more don't you beg me" or "do you want it harder? ask me" or "what do you want?"

I don't have a script but you get the idea of how to get feedback without breaking the scene.

 

[~Dream~]

hmmmm.

Going back to advice fo new doms

When I play with a sub that is new to me to avoid saying "is that ok is that ok" I start with a stroke that is painful but will not mark and ask/say "you liked that didn't you". Then I keep turning up the pain asking/saying "you want more don't you beg me" or "do you want it harder? ask me" or "what do you want?"

I don't have a script but you get the idea of how to get feedback without breaking the scene.

I Always say no pain,no gain lol MASTER took care of all my needs quite wonderfully but I do need to learn to speak up which is kinda embarrassing(letting Him know when I'm cumming) lol

 

[MissTaken]

MZC????

I dont' know whether you scared the daylights out of me or I am going to turn bi!

Perhaps both!

 

[MissTaken]

Yes

Being a sub is far easier than Dom/me!

Realistically, I just have to be, exist, do what I crave and enjoy.

The Dom has to plan, be in tune to both of our needs and use caution. Thinking thinking thinking.

When in fact, one of my favorite pieces of submission is NOT thinking, just being and feeling.

 

[~Dream~]

Re: Yes

Being a sub is far easier than Dom/me!

Realistically, I just have to be, exist, do what I crave and enjoy.

The Dom has to plan, be in tune to both of our needs and use caution. Thinking thinking thinking.

When in fact, one of my favorite pieces of submission is NOT thinking, just being and feeling.

Oh my GOD!! So THATS why my Master is always thinking...I mean ALWAYS .. even inHis sleep! lol and I like Miss T just love to BE and FEEL..I am a very touchy feely person anyways and I loved being both bound and touched by His Masterful hands...

 

[MzChrista]

Re: MZC????

I dont' know whether you scared the daylights out of me or I am going to turn bi!

Perhaps both!

I hope both.

 

[Shadowsdream]

MissT

I do not preplan a scene...it flows through a natural progression of what I read in the eyes or the body language of a submissive.

I may have an idea which toys I will incorporate but do not script their use even in My own mind.

I would never consider breast play as a single game as I like to play several areas of the body to highten sensitivity through the roller coaster of desire that the sub wanting breast torture will ride.

Bending her over the footboard of My bed with the small spreader bar and cuffs attached to her wrists and bound to the head board. Breasts swaying seductively just above the silk sheet. Ankles in the larger spreader bar causing just the tiniest imbalance. Ass provocatively in the air and pussy exposed to My view and desires.

No blindfold for this scene...I want you to be able to see My eyes when you struggle to turn your head to Me, and keep your balance at the same time. Each time you move your nipples just graze the silk sheet enough to remind you of your fantasy.

I will run My hand softly yet firmly down the center of your spine and allow it to rest just above the small of your back as I ask you if you are sure you can endure for My pleasure with no thought for your own. The mind game is beginning that will allow you to give full responsibility to Me for the pleasure W/we both expect you to receive.

I leave your vision now but My voice never leaves you. Calm yet bridging on cruelty My words will taunt you with the reminder that you are fully under My control, no options but to obey and endure as I part your ass cheeks and run My thumb the full length of your exposure and through your moist womanhood to tease an already throbbing clit.

your first moan as you try to move back against My thumb is My hint to introduce one beautiful breast to My hand. A gentle hand, soft yet not doubtful caresses with a loving touch as I describe what touching your body does to Me. How beautiful this piece of property is that I will bruise for My amusement and to assauge the heat and need I have to inflict pain on such vulnerbility.

My words and soft touch will be what changes the pace of your breathing. your eyes will close as your desire for the pain fills all that you are. I have not yet touched a nipple but continue to explore the firm mound that holds the puckered toy of agony from My control.

I grasp your hair at the back of your neck and lift your head so that you must open your eyes and see the confident almost evil look in My eyes as I ask you one last time if this is really what you want. I know your answer will be yes but still I taunt you with the thought that you have chosen your own poison and I will be more than happy to spoon feed it to you.

I reach under your belly where I have placed the ostrich feather and slowly run it flat side against your belly just to make you quiver and take your mind unexpectdly from the breasts you were thinking I would be assaulting. I do not like you to be able to prethink Me so I will continually divert your mind away from your preset goal.

The feather will slowly circle the breast one at a time without touching a nipple. Yes I know it is the torture that you seek but I have heard that so often and found that pain thresholds can be huge in fantasy and minor in reality so I will hedge My bet and take you to a state of horny erotic need before I test your reality.

Once I feel the vibes in the room become thick enough to taste I drop all of My soft ways and begin to walk UP the scale of pleasure for both you and I.

My fingers grasp a nipple at the base and I pull it firmly yet almost gently away from your body until I hear that gentle moan that says OMG i need more. Twisting, still lightly, from one side to the next. Alternating between pulling and twisting, building in intensity as I slide My other hand beneath you to stroke your wet pussy. My voice massaging your emotions as I remind you what a slut girl I see in you. How much I love having the power to show you a mixture of heaven and hell.

Removing My fingers from your wetness I run them over your lips with the instruction not to lick them but to lose yourself in the aroma of your own need.

When I feel the slight relaxation of your body I pinch a swollen nipple hard enough to make you scream and try to pull away. My mocking laughter warns you that it will not happen unless you admit your tolerance is already met and you wish to safe word out. I remind you that there is no shame in using a safe word as I twist and pinch hard and fast not quite giving you time to catch your breath or speak. Then I wait..for you to catch your breath and reconsider your fate.

I have ice cubes in a bowl on the nightstand. I take two..one for each breast..and shock you with the coldness meant to lull you into thinking I am done. No big deal you are thinking. Until that icy coldness begins to become its own kind of unbearable pain. The ice melting to stain the satin sheets. you try to pull away but it is useless. you are feeling the strain in your back and thighs from this unnatural position. I place the unmelted ice back in the bowl and pour some melted wax from the melting pot on the table by the ice into the palm of My hand.

Because of your position I cannot pour wax on you but I can place My hand palm side up and full of wax, over your aching nipple. I do. The contract of the heat and the ice is undeniable as you lurch once again. But it is only a tease.

Allowing the wax to cool takes only a minute and I scrape it off with well manicured fingernails. Taking more time and care than is needed. When your mind is on the thought that I am doing a simple clean up I will twist and pinch until you scream. and scream. and scream.

It is an easy scene..and unfinished but you get the idea...

 

[artful]

Shadows

MissT

I do not preplan a scene...it flows through a natural progression of what I read in the eyes or the body language of a submissive.

I may have an idea which toys I will incorporate but do not script their use even in My own mind.

I would never consider breast play as a single game as I like to play several areas of the body to highten sensitivity through the roller coaster of desire that the sub wanting breast torture will ride.

Bending her over the footboard of My bed with the small spreader bar and cuffs attached to her wrists and bound to the head board. Breasts swaying seductively just above the silk sheet. Ankles in the larger spreader bar causing just the tiniest imbalance. Ass provocatively in the air and pussy exposed to My view and desires.

No blindfold for this scene...I want you to be able to see My eyes when you struggle to turn your head to Me, and keep your balance at the same time. Each time you move your nipples just graze the silk sheet enough to remind you of your fantasy.

I will run My hand softly yet firmly down the center of your spine and allow it to rest just above the small of your back as I ask you if you are sure you can endure for My pleasure with no thought for your own. The mind game is beginning that will allow you to give full responsibility to Me for the pleasure W/we both expect you to receive.

I leave your vision now but My voice never leaves you. Calm yet bridging on cruelty My words will taunt you with the reminder that you are fully under My control, no options but to obey and endure as I part your ass cheeks and run My thumb the full length of your exposure and through your moist womanhood to tease an already throbbing clit.

your first moan as you try to move back against My thumb is My hint to introduce one beautiful breast to My hand. A gentle hand, soft yet not doubtful caresses with a loving touch as I describe what touching your body does to Me. How beautiful this piece of property is that I will bruise for My amusement and to assauge the heat and need I have to inflict pain on such vulnerbility.

My words and soft touch will be what changes the pace of your breathing. your eyes will close as your desire for the pain fills all that you are. I have not yet touched a nipple but continue to explore the firm mound that holds the puckered toy of agony from My control.

I grasp your hair at the back of your neck and lift your head so that you must open your eyes and see the confident almost evil look in My eyes as I ask you one last time if this is really what you want. I know your answer will be yes but still I taunt you with the thought that you have chosen your own poison and I will be more than happy to spoon feed it to you.

I reach under your belly where I have placed the ostrich feather and slowly run it flat side against your belly just to make you quiver and take your mind unexpectdly from the breasts you were thinking I would be assaulting. I do not like you to be able to prethink Me so I will continually divert your mind away from your preset goal.

The feather will slowly circle the breast one at a time without touching a nipple. Yes I know it is the torture that you seek but I have heard that so often and found that pain thresholds can be huge in fantasy and minor in reality so I will hedge My bet and take you to a state of horny erotic need before I test your reality.

Once I feel the vibes in the room become thick enough to taste I drop all of My soft ways and begin to walk UP the scale of pleasure for both you and I.

My fingers grasp a nipple at the base and I pull it firmly yet almost gently away from your body until I hear that gentle moan that says OMG i need more. Twisting, still lightly, from one side to the next. Alternating between pulling and twisting, building in intensity as I slide My other hand beneath you to stroke your wet pussy. My voice massaging your emotions as I remind you what a slut girl I see in you. How much I love having the power to show you a mixture of heaven and hell.

Removing My fingers from your wetness I run them over your lips with the instruction not to lick them but to lose yourself in the aroma of your own need.

When I feel the slight relaxation of your body I pinch a swollen nipple hard enough to make you scream and try to pull away. My mocking laughter warns you that it will not happen unless you admit your tolerance is already met and you wish to safe word out. I remind you that there is no shame in using a safe word as I twist and pinch hard and fast not quite giving you time to catch your breath or speak. Then I wait..for you to catch your breath and reconsider your fate.

I have ice cubes in a bowl on the nightstand. I take two..one for each breast..and shock you with the coldness meant to lull you into thinking I am done. No big deal you are thinking. Until that icy coldness begins to become its own kind of unbearable pain. The ice melting to stain the satin sheets. you try to pull away but it is useless. you are feeling the strain in your back and thighs from this unnatural position. I place the unmelted ice back in the bowl and pour some melted wax from the melting pot on the table by the ice into the palm of My hand.

Because of your position I cannot pour wax on you but I can place My hand palm side up and full of wax, over your aching nipple. I do. The contract of the heat and the ice is undeniable as you lurch once again. But it is only a tease.

Allowing the wax to cool takes only a minute and I scrape it off with well manicured fingernails. Taking more time and care than is needed. When your mind is on the thought that I am doing a simple clean up I will twist and pinch until you scream. and scream. and scream.

It is an easy scene..and unfinished but you get the idea...

Of course,...and once again I agree. Why do something if it is only a rote performance. Delivering shock, torment, surprise, pleasure and pain is where it's at. Timing is EVERYTHING.

I would never have attempted to spank Dream at the bus station if all conditions had not been met. Fortunately,..for us both,...the *MOMENT* arrived.

Had it NOT,...I would not have forced the play. For ME,...the *HEAT*,...is in the "Control". The KNOWING that "I" am in charge at all times during a play, is of paramount importance.

I however, have a wide streak of voyeurism in me also. It pleases me to SEE the reactions in her eyes,...her face,...the squirming of her body,... the breath that is held for such a LONG period of time.

The pounding pulse in her arteries,...the stretched tendons,...the clenching of her hands,..
.the quivering of her muscles as they strain to endure. Well, you get the idea...LOL-

 

[MissTaken]

My thread is backfiring ....

The Domme's are making me wet and anxious!






A side note: I have been talking with a Dom who has many years experience and comes highly thought of and recommended by a trusted sub friend.

We talk often. His turn on is the ability to control. The knowing that I will do anything, simply out of respect and devotion for him and that I will enjoy it, love it, beg for more.

He isn't a sadist, but uses pain in his play. Pain being used to enhance sensation.

Hmmm lovely!

Now, if he spanks me, either softy and quickly at first or randomly and firmly in the beginning, increasing speed and pressure until my butt is all tingly, I may have found nirvana!

Then, when the bottom is nice and red, very warm, to sink finger nails or teeth into it sends an electric charge throughout my body.

The first time this happened to me, I was literally taken aback, stunned and begging for more!



Just my randome two cents on the topic this morning!

 

[artful]

Re: My thread is backfiring ....

The Domme's are making me wet and anxious!


A side note: I have been talking with a Dom who has many years experience and comes highly thought of and recommended by a trusted sub friend.

We talk often. His turn on is the ability to control. The knowing that I will do anything, simply out of respect and devotion for him and that I will enjoy it, love it, beg for more.

He isn't a sadist, but uses pain in his play. Pain being used to enhance sensation.

Hmmm lovely!

Now, if he spanks me, either softy and quickly at first or randomly and firmly in the beginning, increasing speed and pressure until my butt is all tingly, I may have found nirvana!

Then, when the bottom is nice and red, very warm, to sink finger nails or teeth into it sends an electric charge throughout my body.

The first time this happened to me, I was literally taken aback, stunned and begging for more!



Just my randome two cents on the topic this morning!

Backfires and butt fires are ALL good MissT. For some reason,...I think you will REALLY enjoy THIS meet.(Just a hunch-but damn I am good at guessing)

 

[P. B. Walker]

OMG!!! Shadowsdream! Dayyyyummm. Whew... had to catch my breath after reading that passage. And I might have to uhmmm.... make a quick exit to the restroom....

Word of advice to everyone: never read a passage like that while at work. hehehe

- PBW "Shadowsdream is a studette!"

 

[Ebonyfire]

OMG!!! Shadowsdream! Dayyyyummm. Whew... had to catch my breath after reading that passage. And I might have to uhmmm.... make a quick exit to the restroom....

Word of advice to everyone: never read a passage like that while at work. hehehe

- PBW "Shadowsdream is a studette!"

Are we about to be a nasty boy? LOL Oh if the mens rooms of most jobs could talk!

LOL

Eb

 

[P. B. Walker]

Are we about to be a nasty boy? LOL Oh if the mens rooms of most jobs could talk!

LOL

Eb

Would the PBW man ever be nasty??! Heaven forbid. LOL. Now that I printed out shadowsdreams other thread... uhmm... anyhoo...

I don't even want to know what our restroom would say... lol

PBW

 

[Shadowsdream]

P. B. Walker

Wondering if you are going to the womans washroom looking for a sub or the mens washroom to relieve the non work related pressure of Lit?

 

[Ebonyfire]

P. B. Walker

Wondering if you are going to the womans washroom looking for a sub or the mens washroom to relieve the non work related pressure of Lit?

Yeah PBW, inquiring minds want to know!

Eb

 

[WillowPuss]

OMG!!! Shadowsdream! Dayyyyummm. Whew... had to catch my breath after reading that passage. And I might have to uhmmm.... make a quick exit to the restroom....

Word of advice to everyone: never read a passage like that while at work. hehehe

- PBW "Shadowsdream is a studette!"

PBW ... I have to make sure that I do not read such threads too early in the day ... to have to put up with an 'itch hour after hour is ... errrrrr

well, you get the picture.

 

[Shadowsdream]

willow gives very good advise!

 

[P. B. Walker]

P. B. Walker

Wondering if you are going to the womans washroom looking for a sub or the mens washroom to relieve the non work related pressure of Lit?

Uhmm... relief was on my mind


PBW "I have no shame"

 

[Shadowsdream]

RITUALS BEFORE BED

Ending the day with rituals is just as important as beginning the day with them. Simplicity should always be kept in mind so that a tired submissive can perform them with ease and not feel a fear of failure. This can be a time of reinforcement of the Power position held by the Dominant as well as a reminder to the submissive how fortunate they are to be owned. The Dominant will decide when their toy will go to bed and where they will sleep that night.
The rituals I have devised begin long before a submissive actually retires to sleep or to be used. Turning off all of the lights and computers will begin the process once I have given the word that I will retire. I expect the bed to be turned down previous to this statement. I will instruct the owned property to brush their teeth even though they are perfectly capable of remembering this themselves. I do this for the continual flow of verbal communication and control. My submissive are expected to drop gracefully to their knees at the side of My bed if they wish to spend a few minutes speaking to Me before discovering where they will sleep that night.
They will have their hands gently clasped behind their backs and will keep their tone of voice low and respectful. Falling into the frog position ( prostrate on their knees with forehead to the floor) and ask humbly if they may crawl into My bed.
If I allow it the submissive will enter the bed slowly and come into My arms to be held if invited to do so. If I have made the decision that their sleeping will occur outside of My bed they will go without question to the designated sleeping area.
I expect to be thanked each and every night, without exception, for taking My submissive to slavery and for allowing him to be My pet. This particular ritual I have devised for one slave only. The one under a lifetime contract to be Mine. The one that has the honor of wearing a lifetime collar of committment.

THE CULMINATION OF RITUALS


When a submissive has been properly trained in the ritualization of daily expectations created specifically for him or her they begin to become almost one with their Owners. Safety and contentment increases as they automatically perform without thought the rituals that have become second nature.
The Dominants hold tightens even as Her work load of instructions naturally decreases. The submissive hold on their freedom loosens more into Her hands without thought. Rituals create a Win/win situation.
The Dominant takes on a monumental responsibility when She begins to contemplate altering the mind set of another human being. All the consequences must be weighed when these rituals are meant to be a life long commitment on both sides of the D/s equasion.
Repetition must be enforced, rewarded, or disciplined to become standard, acceptable routines. They should bring pride both to the Dominant and the submissive.
I like to keep the rituals simple and sparse so that they can be easy and fluidly executed throughout the day while still leaving plenty of room for spontaneous behaviour.

 

[Shadowsdream]

RITUALS AND DOMINANTS


It may appear that rituals are created for the sole purpose of controlling submissive but in fact that is far from the truth. The very routines so carefully orchestrated by the Dominant also benefit Her in ways not yet identified in the previous segments of this discussion.
Once Her toys are well trained She knows how they will behave in public and in private. Her life is simplified as She no longer needs long explanations of Her expectations to get immediate predictable results. A simple hand gesture, a look or a word can convey a required ritualistic behaviour. If She decides to be bathed in the middle of the day She knows that Her bath will be drawn correctly, without question. She already knows Her submissive will bathe Her in the exact manner She has become accustomed to. There will be no explantion about why She has this desire nor any need to waste Her time instructing how She should be bathed. If She has made this decision in the late evening She will have already taught Her submissive to prepare the bathing area with fragrant candles and scented water to enhance Her mood to luxuriate.
When taking Her submissive out into public She will have no fear of having to deal with behaviour unbeffiting those owned by Her. She will look at them with pride in Her eyes when She witnesses the trust in their eyes.The Dominant knows Her word is law and that there will be no dispute about it. She has earned the respect She is given, She has not taken it.


and that is that!

 

[Shadowsdream]

O no I posted the rituals to the technique thread arghhhhh..shhh
maybe no one will notice?