Do you have to ask permission if...

[AnelizeDarkEyes]

Well, well, well. Our favorite troll. Back for some more.

Didn't you ask all these questions a few months ago??

Things slow over on the GB again?

Unless you stop feeding her folks, she won't go away. *sigh*

She'll couch her nasty comments, in subtle statements like the ones right here

Originally posted by Eating_Scarlett
Dictating when and if you can cut your own hair... there's no logic to the whole idea. <snip>

The only thing is, BDSM takes everything to it's extreme.

Personally, I think she sucked up way too much bandwith LAST time.

~anelize

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

Yes yes, I know, and I've probably asked all these questions before, it's just that lately my bf has been doing things in bed that he doesn't usually do, or hasn't ever done. I'm just wondering where it's coming from and where it's going and I'm STILL trying to get my head around calling someone your Master when we were all created equal.

 

[Etoile]

Given the person asking the question, I'll just say that some of us have to ask permission, and some of us don't. It varies by couple.

 

[Krinaia]

Yes yes, I know, and I've probably asked all these questions before, it's just that lately my bf has been doing things in bed that he doesn't usually do, or hasn't ever done. I'm just wondering where it's coming from and where it's going and I'm STILL trying to get my head around calling someone your Master when we were all created equal.

geez... i don't think most submissives truly consider themselves "lesser" in any way. we just choose to submit because it pleasures us and it pleasures the one we submit to. there is a need inside us.

don't forget - not only were we all created equal but we were all created differently

and it isn't the action that makes it bdsm, its the attitude behind the action

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

 

[Quint]

<snip> and it isn't the action that makes it bdsm, its the attitude behind the action </snip>

Exactly! A couple who never think of themselves as anything but partners can engage in fisting, roleplaying, spanking, namecalling, and any other number of fetishes just for the sake of fun sex. It's when they examine their roles and one says "gosh, I really prefer being on the bottom of all this, and I really enjoy working for your pleasure first" and the other says "well, that's good because I enjoy controlling the sensations you feel and I like being pleasured," THEN it starts--starts-- becoming a D/s relationship. Mind over matter.

So don't fear--you remain uncorrupted, just kinky.

 

[hurtme]

This goes back to my I can't be submissive all the time thing, and it might sounds repetitive, but i will say it again. there are certian things I get to choose, my hair color, or cut is one of them. I wouldn't redye my currently dark red with black framing the front, hair for any man, regardless of his position...I just got it all cut off (it was quite long, now it is chin length + a little) and I love it, I didn't need to ask anyones permission, I am so not comfortable doing that. Just like I wouldn't stop running around in all my goth clothes (or guess you would call them my normal clothes, since thats all I own) for the same reaosn. Luckily for me though, I have two things going for me, number one, I have never had a man yet (well, there was in incident in high school, but thats a different pointless story) who didn't adore my look, nilla or otherwise, and I always ask his opinion about it. If he was dead set against something, I might think twice, but he has never had a problem at any way I choose to express myself

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

 

[BrightFlower]

wow, looks like me first thing in the morning.....

 

[SweetDommes]

Our boy is currently growing his hair out after asking our opinion about it. We didn't tell him that he had to, but we did mention that we prefer hair to be longer than the buzz cut that he used to have. If we end up with a boy who looks really good with hair too short to pull on, we'll deal with it, or who really doesn't want to grow his hair out, whatever ... but if we have a boy with long hair ... wonderful long hair ... it's staying until I'm tired of looking at it, period.

As for color, it doesn't even have to be natural for me, as long as it looks good (and yes, blue hair does actually look good on some people) ... I can't speak for Holly though - I think she prefers natural hair colors.

 

[Krinaia]

YOU ARE SOOOOO WEIRD

you're a peach.


I have that outfit in powder blue. I like to wear it to the grocery store. I wish I had a chiuaua to carry in my purse. I'd make him wear a blue bow on his head.

 

[rick_j21]

When I was in my 24/7 relationship my Domme had preferences on hair and then she had rules. Pretty much if the hair was above my ears I could do what I wanted with it as long as it was long enough she could pull it. Below the eyes was hers. She wouldn't allow me to have any facial hair and she insisted on shaving my body weekly. Funny though how I am not in a relationship and I grew facial hair and have quit shaving my body hair (though it's kept trim). I wonder if it's subconsconciously related because I didnt say "She's gone I can grow a beard".

 

[MissTaken]

Or maybe, rick,
letting your grooming go may simply be the "What's the use? No one is going to see it" attitude.

I have had that one periodically.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Funny though how I am not in a relationship and I grew facial hair and have quit shaving my body hair

Hey Behave! ~~grin~~

you never know who might be looking!

 

[rick_j21]

Laughs at the two responses. I am a very nice and well groomed man. Lol, I just don't have anyone who wants to see whether I have hair there or not.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Laughs at the two responses. I am a very nice and well groomed man. Lol, I just don't have anyone who wants to see whether I have hair there or not.

Ha ha ha and you are a fast little beast in your response.

 

[rick_j21]

I just have to make sure I stay ahead in the game to keep the Mistresses happy.

 

[Shadowsdream]

I just have to make sure I stay ahead in the game to keep the Mistresses happy.

Well I see a lot of intelligence in that thought....~~grin~~
It would appear that you are also a man with a good sense of humour and self esteem.

 

[Red Menace]

Originally posted by Eating_Scarlett
Dictating when and if you can cut your own hair... there's no logic to the whole idea.

There's plenty of logic there. If you can accept the idea that as the Master, he owns the hair and has every right to see it cut and colored the way he likes it. I always ask before doing anything to it. It's his hair. I'd hate to do something to it he didn't like.

Also, what about degrading you in bed, calling you a slut or a whore... is that a BDSM thing? So many of these things translate into 'vanilla' relationships as well. Where do you stop having a normal relationship and start having a dom/sub one?

Hair pulling, name calling, anal stuff, toys, spanking ect. are not inherently D/s or M/s. They're not even really terribly kinky anymore. Dom/sub or Master/ slave starts when one person offers authority and control to the other and they accept it.

"Kinky is using a feather.
Perverted is using the whole chicken."

 

[rick_j21]

Well I see a lot of intelligence in that thought....~~grin~~
It would appear that you are also a man with a good sense of humour and self esteem.

I hope those three things are always seen in me. It makes me proud that you see them.

 

[SweetDommes]

I hope those three things are always seen in me. It makes me proud that you see them.

They aren't the only ones who have seen them rick ...

 

[Shadowsdream]

Thinking of this permission question and hair...I thought I would post a picture of the slaves current hair length and color...I am considering changing the color but can't quite make up My mind if I wish to go lighter or darker...any opinions?

 

[Ms_Lilith]

Shadowsdream, Ma'am, I think darker would look nice. A nice, rich brown.

 

[SweetDommes]

Thinking of this permission question and hair...I thought I would post a picture of the slaves current hair length and color...I am considering changing the color but can't quite make up My mind if I wish to go lighter or darker...any opinions?

oooh, nice length, and definately darker ... a nice dark rich brown ...

 

[Shadowsdream]

Thanks for the suggestions..darker is what I thought as well but am at the moment tormenting him with the possibility that I will choose pink or blue!
I do allow a half inch trim twice a year..whether he needs it or not!