Dominants versus "control complex"

[Marquis]

Quite frankly, I have her on ignore.

Well, that's very frank, rebecca rosie symbol, very forward for one "claiming" to be a submissive.

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Well, that's very frank, rebecca rosie symbol, very forward for one "claiming" to be a submissive.

: chuckles : Never mind me Marquis, I am just sitting here singing some Aretha to myself .

he sang as if he knew me
In all my darkness fair
and then he looked right through me
as if i wasn't there
and he kept on singing
singing clear and strong
Strumming my pain with his fingers
Singing my life with his words
killing me softy with his song
killing me softly with his song
telling my whole life
with his words
killing me softly with his song

ohhhhhhhhhhh oohhhhhhh...lalalal..ohhhh lalaaaaaaa

 

[Netzach]

And the "25 years masturbating to an internal script" people? Instant, total turn-off.

Are they always that obvious though?

I've found that often it really takes a few get-togethers before it becomes apparent, if they're above average in other ways. These are people who have convinced *themselves* they are there for your benefit and amusement, and are often able to do a very good job convincing people of above-average bullshit detection of same.

And frankly a lot of M's don't mind a fair amount of you/me symbiosis - I'm not so much about that honestly in a "your needs my needs, your needs my needs" parsing. "My pleasure, your needs to the point where they're not contradictory with my pleasure" is how I see it - getting someone on the page is not commonplace. And they don't have to be an asshole, they can be thoroughly delightful as a person - I even married one who's not suited this way.

 

[Homburg]

Are they always that obvious though?

Nope, and that's the pisser. It is something that has me reevaluting my vetting process.

I've found that often it really takes a few get-togethers before it becomes apparent, if they're above average in other ways. These are people who have convinced *themselves* they are there for your benefit and amusement, and are often able to do a very good job convincing people of above-average bullshit detection of same.

Aye, the times I've seen it the portrayal was submissive. None of that "Wow, this is the real deal" vibe, but still worthwhile and might make a good recurring play partner. Later, after some play, I realised that this was not the case, and I'd found a "do-me bottom". That is when the turn-off occurred, that instant of realisation.

 

[catalina_francisco]

i dont have 12 Masters. that would be....exhausting 2 is at least enough.

to the person who didnt see how that could work...both Masters are good friends, so i think tht helps. they sort of divide my time and the time of another slave between them...and i spend much more time with Master than Master2. my slave sister spends more time with Master2 than Master.

That was probably me and no, I still don't get how it would be possible with the type M/s relationship I live, nor would it fulfil either of us. For us, a Master should not ever have to negotiate or plan with another when said slave/s will be available for them, you just are 24/7, no excuses and no time off. For you it obviously works...for us, once negotiation has to become part of the plan, slavery is no longer what is on the table.

i just get cringy when people seem to have more of a kinky vanilla relationship, and claim its M/s or even D/s. i guess i am constantly seeking the most intensely pure experience of being owned i can find, and knee-jerk lash out when it seems people are diluting what Master and slavery and TPE are all about.

Once again this demonstrates the difference on individual definitions, and that as much as you feel you know, you never know the million other details which are not posted by another. As to looking for the most intensely pure owned experience you can find, I would suggest it isn't about how many people you can sign up to label themselves your Owners, but being owned in a way where you are available always to your Owner, not just when it is convenient with you, your schedule or someone else. But once again, that is just possible differences in our own realities and what we are willing to live with individually...for you yours works better, for me mine works better.

Catalina

 

[unfoundiamond]

Jay Wiesman...

I was re-reading ssomething I had bookmarked, and I realized it had some relevance to this topic,

He likened the search for a "good" Dominant, to exploring in the wilderness. A wilderness full of "beauty and danger" and talks about "bad apples"...

Heres a link...

http://members.aol.com/OldRope/10femtip.htm

 

[twysted73]

Jay Weisman... (101). Great read. What's this I hear about you having marks discovered on your neck at school after some play the day before?

When you were playing (with whoever gave you those marks), did you say.."Stoooop. You're hurting my neck! Ooooooooow."