Dr. Ruth meets Dr. Seuss

[Quoll]

What can I say, I just wove a nice cwitowis.

 

[EJFan]

What can I say, I just wove a nice cwitowis.

maybe i should weave one... since there aren't any real ones available.

 

[Quoll]

maybe i should weave one... since there aren't any real ones available.

I wouldn't weave won, anyone could just pick it up.

 

[EJFan]

I wouldn't weave won, anyone could just pick it up.

how about if i weave it and keep it?

 

[EJFan]

here bg... not sure why you'd want to resurrect it but knock yourself out.

 

[Quoll]

here bg... not sure why you'd want to resurrect it but knock yourself out.

Would you, could you, should you.

 

[SweetErika]

Would you, could you, should you.

I would, I could in a bed
But maybe I should give more head?
I would, I could in a bar
Yet what if I went too far?

"Too far?" you say.
Yes, too far in a bar
Or possibly in a car
Way too far on a plane
So that everyone would think I'd gone insane!

 

[bobsgirl]

here bg... not sure why you'd want to resurrect it but knock yourself out.

I wanted to resurrect it because I don't think I've ever read it. I missed out on a lot for some months in 2005.

 

[Quoll]

I would, I could in a bed
But maybe I should give more head?
I would, I could in a bar
Yet what if I went too far?

"Too far?" you say.
Yes, too far in a bar
Or possibly in a car
Way too far on a plane
So that everyone would think I'd gone insane!

I've said it before and I'll say it again, you really should fluff more.

 

[thecharlieman]

I guess I'm just easily entertained.


Thank You BG for dragging this one up!!


Funny stuff!


PQ & EJ- Have you to ever though of taking your act on the road?

You two just seem to be able to feed off of each other so well!

 

[EJFan]

PQ & EJ- Have you to ever though of taking your act on the road?

You two just seem to be able to feed off of each other so well!

thank you. we've actually found that there are too many reckless drivers on the road (plus the lighting is inadequate) so we try to stick to physical structures with a proper stage.

 

[Phaedre]

I wanted to resurrect it because I don't think I've ever read it. I missed out on a lot for some months in 2005.

I glad it was resurrected as I'd not seen it before and am laughing so hard I nearly fell of my chair.

 

[thecharlieman]

I glad it was resurrected as I'd not seen it before and am laughing so hard I nearly fell of my chair.

So I'm NOT the only one that's easily entertained?


Even though I don't have a quick wit, those of you here that do, I thank you immensely. You are able to bring a bit of laughter into an otherwise drab life.

 

[bobsgirl]

I'm sorry Dr Ruth is not availabe today, her place will be taken by renowned sexoligist Elmer P Fudd.
Q:
I have a wonderful lover/husband, but we once watched an adult movie and I am now very self-conscious because I have a small clitoris. I feel like a freak. Is there anything I can do to make it protrude more so that I would feel sexier? I am afraid of losing my husband because I am not as sexual as I should be and I feel so different. Please help me.

A:
You're not so diffewent as you seem to think. What you're suffewing fwom is the same thing that I've heard quite often fwom a wot of men who watch pawn movies. They see the male stars with enormous penises and feew that their penis doesn't measure up. But this is the fiwst time I've had a woman ask me the "size" question vis-a-vis her cwitowis. My answer, however, is going to be vewy simiwar: Pawn movies are not miwwors of weaw wife. They choose men who are wew-endowed, and it's vewy wikewy that the cwitowis you saw in that movie wasn't typical either.

More importantwy, just as the size of a man's penis doesn't make him a better or worse wover, the size of your cwitowis has nothing to do with your sexuawity. You can have owgasms whether your cwitowis is big or small, and if you are not having owgasms, it's not because of the size of your cwitowis.

You mention that you want to be more sexuaw for your husband. It might just be that your appetites are diffewent, and you can't do much to change that. Or you may be having a wewationship pwobwem that is causing you to not want to have sex as much. These are issues to expwore, which you can twy to do on your own or with a counsewor's help.

You can cweate a more sensuwoo mood by :

Fiwst taking a bubboo bath
wying down on dwark satin sheets
using wowered wighting or wow wattage red buwbs or candlewight
sipping a gwass of wine or nibbwing on a dewicious piece of chocowate
wistening to your favowite music in the backgwound, and,
above awl, fantasize, and fantasize!

Wow, pq, you give good fluff.

 

[shy slave]

thank you. we've actually found that there are too many reckless drivers on the road (plus the lighting is inadequate) so we try to stick to physical structures with a proper stage.

LOL

Good thread, made me smile

Erika, quoll is right you should fluff more, you have a really great sense of fluff

 

[Quoll]

I guess I'm just easily entertained.


Thank You BG for dragging this one up!!


Funny stuff!


PQ & EJ- Have you to ever though of taking your act on the road?

You two just seem to be able to feed off of each other so well!

Like leeches.

 

[EJFan]

Like leeches.

are you trying to say we suck?

 

[bobsgirl]

are you trying to say we suck?

That's really very funny, EJ...

 

[Leah57]

Oh my goodness, "I laughed so hard, I peed my pants".... or was that "I liked it as much as the Pirates of Penzance"????

too, TOO funny!!!! thanks for finding this in the archives!