Dumb Question 2: Do women like it?

[SubbieHubbie2]

Oh hell, me too... most heady and fragrant wine there is isn't it? Of course... as I discovered with my ex a few years ago, a vinegar douche (or whatever the hell she was using) can make that a less than pleasant experience but...

 

[SEVERUSMAX]

She used VINEGAR? Oh, god, that's gross!

I was just making an example, but yes, I love pussy. I also love to get head.

 

[Aeroil]

https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=319312
subbyhubbie explains it there I think, whosonfirst

 

[SubbieHubbie2]

I'm going to assume that your question comes from reading mine as being offensive or troll-bait. It wasn't intended to be, but I was worried someone might see it that way. So, I'll answer yours and then explain where I think my fears about the validity of this ridiculous research came from.

In that I am submissive, I am in the lifestyle. I am a service sub and a sensation slut. In that I am faithful to my wife who has yet to fully accept her domination of me though she has now said she accepts that I am submissive, I am not in the lifestyle anywhere near as much as a) I wish I were or b) most others here are.


Now, my fear that the research might be valid (and it seemed ridiculous to begin with, but I grew concerned/self judgmental) is, I believe, based in the extreme rejection I received from my wife about 3 years ago when we first experimented and she got overloaded by things she read (as a survivor of abuse at the hands of a matriarch, the prospect of any sadistic act became traumatic to her - it was never what I was interested in, but it was there somewhere in everything she read and thus she became triggered). For more information, check the link Aeroil provides. Now, as a survivor myself, one of my personal triggers is suggestions that I am sick, depraved, worthless, etc. Thus, her reaction of rejection, followed by 3 years of trying to work out what all this meant, led to a need for reassurance that, in fact, it's not all about the guys. I turned to the community. Some very welcoming, supportive and caring doms/subs/switches posted to show that in fact the research had been nonsense and that some women, as some men, do enjoy bdsm. This normalized my feelings, eased my fears about my self (if you don't get it I can't explain further), and thus while it doesn't answer just how all this fits in with my marriage as is, it makes self-acceptance easier.

As I said somewhere above, I thank all the wonderful members of the community who responded for their response. I also reiterate my apology for any offense I caused.

 

[Etoile]

You call yourself SubbieHubbie, are you really into the lifestyle at all?

A new person who has made all of two posts is picking the screen name of somebody else. How threatening!

SubbieHubbie2, I don't think you have anything to apologize for, and I don't think you have to be worried about offending anybody.

 

[chris9]

Back to the original question

I'm the living counter-proof of the theory that women enjoy bdsm only because they want to please their men.
I found out I'm submissive, I need some pain to become really aroused. My boyfriend just isn't really into it. He doesn't mind playing a bit every now and then as he enjoys pleasing me, and if spanking is pleasing, so be it... Anyhow, he just does it for my pleasure and then draws his pleasure in it from my pleasure.
I'm not sure this all makes sense, but I guess I just want to say that for us it's just different than this "research" says.
Don't believe in any statistic, unless you made it up yourself!