Feminism and being a submissive

Marquis said:
CuriousJen, you just made it onto my map. Excellent post and I agree with every word.

Awwww shucks you've made me blush and not just an internet one of these :eek: blushes - an actual gone purple blush. Owen is now laughing at me. Thanks. :)
 
i agree with you, 100%, curiousjen. i couldn't have said it better myself, thanks.

For me, a feminist is one who believes in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. For me, that means, regardless of sexual gender, everyone should be entitled to the freedom of choice for themselves in determining their own destiny for the persuit of whatever defines their own comfort levels (aka happiness).

i am a submissive woman BUT only by MY choice, and only to who *i* decide is deserving as a recipient. Being submissive, in my case, does not equal being submissive to ALL. i have one Master. i call Him Master because He has given me reason to WANT to submit to Him, and therefore i have/do. i have always been submissive and have always chosen when and to whom i will submit.

For much of my life i kept my submissiveness well hidden and guarded from others as a measure of safety and self preservation (aka survival). i knew that side of myself long before i ever was given a label to identify it with. Most who know me have rarely seen my softer, docile side & those who i have trusted enough to share it with have only got a small peak at the true depth of which that side of me exists. Only one, my Master, has been allowed and trusted to see, hold, cherish and devour that side of myself fully unleashed.

For Him, i am 100% submissive to the core (initially by my own choice, with that one choice existing infinitely). Concerning anyone else, i yield to no one else's choice other than my own, and am quite strong in my opinions, and choices (by Master's definition i am 'stubborn'). A submissive who does not submit to ALL is no less of a submissive. The rest of the world should keep their noses in their own business, relationships etc. rather than trying to define how others should live, their happiness, comfort levels etc.

¸,ø¤º°sinn0cent°º¤ø,¸ proudly owned by, and devoted to INSIDEYOURMIND
 
Thanks Everyone for your point of view. It would be great to get a male opinion also. What are your thoughts and comments.
 
Miss Diva said:
Thanks Everyone for your point of view. It would be great to get a male opinion also. What are your thoughts and comments.

What the fuck am I?
 
Marquis said:
I mean, I can understand you excluding Aeroil!
yeah, seeing as how my post was just sayin how I agreed with vixandra.
 
I fetishize a pre-feminism pattern of relationships, but I'm glad I didn't live back then; when there was no reliable birth control and oral was something you had to go to Paris to get.
 
rosco rathbone said:
I fetishize a pre-feminism pattern of relationships, but I'm glad I didn't live back then; when there was no reliable birth control and oral was something you had to go to Paris to get.


I find this common amongst many BDSMers and nothing could be further from the truth for me. I always imagine wives back in those days being submissive in theory only. I've been with too many women from more traditional countries like those in Latin America that have been taught every trick in the book on how to top from the bottom imaginable.
 
Marquis said:
I find this common amongst many BDSMers and nothing could be further from the truth for me. I always imagine wives back in those days being submissive in theory only. I've been with too many women from more traditional countries like those in Latin America that have been taught every trick in the book on how to top from the bottom imaginable.

yeah, have you all ever heard of a 'hen pecked husband'?
 
Well, at least it was shameful to be henpecked back then. Now sucking it up and saying please maam may I have some more is called being a good modern man.
 
rosco rathbone said:
Well, at least it was shameful to be henpecked back then. Now sucking it up and saying please maam may I have some more is called being a good modern man.
Isn't it called being a sub? Modern men are expected to be equal aren't they?
 
Aeroil said:
Isn't it called being a sub? Modern men are expected to be equal aren't they?
I was just being crotchety, no disrespect intended for the male subs. They do what they do by choice, in defiance of society instead of knuckling under to its demands.

Being as I wasn't at large during pre-feminism days; I can't say what it was actually like. If I fetishize a fantasy of those times rather than a reality, so be it.
 
rosco rathbone said:
I was just being crotchety, no disrespect intended for the male subs. They do what they do by choice, in defiance of society instead of knuckling under to its demands.

Being as I wasn't at large during pre-feminism days; I can't say what it was actually like. If I fetishize a fantasy of those times rather than a reality, so be it.

I don't know about you, but reality sure don't get my dick hard.
 
rosco rathbone said:
I was just being crotchety, no disrespect intended for the male subs. They do what they do by choice, in defiance of society instead of knuckling under to its demands.

Being as I wasn't at large during pre-feminism days; I can't say what it was actually like. If I fetishize a fantasy of those times rather than a reality, so be it.
By choice? in a wierd way maybe. I didn't choose to be a sub, but I can't be anything else, I know, if I could do vanilla I doubt I'd do it well. but in totality you are right in one thing, screw society :p.
 
Marquis said:
I think there is social pressure for males to be more dominant and females to be more submissive, and I think a lot of people fall into the roles they think they're supposed to be playing. So what do we get? A bunch of bitches saying things like,

"Can't you even spank me right you fucking dog?"


It's rare that you'll find a woman that owns her dominant tendencies, but I see them left and right.

OSG, I think the degree to which you take your submission is very hot, but I strongly disagree with you about your choice being natural for females in general. I too, know what it feels like to be intrinsically psychosexual, but I don't expect others to share my state of being merely because we share gender. I've noticed I have more in common with Tops than bottoms for example, whether they be gay, straight, male or female.


i don't think "all" fems are submissive....i think submissiveness is a natural state for females, and Dominance a natural state for Males. and like all things in nature, there are exceptions to every rule. conjoined twins for example, are every bit as real and naturally occuring as "normal" twins. but, they are not what nature intended...somewere along the way, some wires were crossed...that is how i view male subs or fem Dominants...it may be possible for a man to be born pure sub or a woman to be born pure Dom, but they are exceptions to the rule...anomalies (also, imo a top and a Dominant are 2 very different creatures).

but, our modern world rejects such ideas....that there's any rhyme or reason to human nature and relationsips...that there's any natural order. and honestly it saddens me and makes me long for another place or time, far far away from this world that encourages lil girls to grow up to be independent, ball busting, "don't need a man" women, and lil boys to be weak, non-controlling, and grovelling at women's feet.
 
ownedsubgal said:
i don't think "all" fems are submissive....i think submissiveness is a natural state for females, and Dominance a natural state for Males. and like all things in nature, there are exceptions to every rule. conjoined twins for example, are every bit as real and naturally occuring as "normal" twins. but, they are not what nature intended...somewere along the way, some wires were crossed...that is how i view male subs or fem Dominants...it may be possible for a man to be born pure sub or a woman to be born pure Dom, but they are exceptions to the rule...anomalies (also, imo a top and a Dominant are 2 very different creatures).

but, our modern world rejects such ideas....that there's any rhyme or reason to human nature and relationsips...that there's any natural order. and honestly it saddens me and makes me long for another place or time, far far away from this world that encourages lil girls to grow up to be independent, ball busting, "don't need a man" women, and lil boys to be weak, non-controlling, and grovelling at women's feet.
As found in nature? lol.... not always.... As often as not, the female is way more dominant than the males in lots of different species, look at black widows, the female is about five times the size of the male, and after they mate the male has to run for his life because the female will eat him otherwise. In a lot of other species, the female will be much more aggressive because she is protecting the young, the male will be the one who gathers food, and doesn't do anything aggressive at all. The most dangerous kind of bears are the female bears, especially if they have young.
Humans themselves are anomalies of nature anyway.......
 
ownedsubgal said:
i don't think "all" fems are submissive....i think submissiveness is a natural state for females, and Dominance a natural state for Males. and like all things in nature, there are exceptions to every rule. conjoined twins for example, are every bit as real and naturally occuring as "normal" twins. but, they are not what nature intended...somewere along the way, some wires were crossed...that is how i view male subs or fem Dominants...it may be possible for a man to be born pure sub or a woman to be born pure Dom, but they are exceptions to the rule...anomalies (also, imo a top and a Dominant are 2 very different creatures).
.


I know several Dominant females and one Male sub pretty well, and based on that experience, I respectfully disagree. I don't think male subs are all that uncommon. Look at all the fetish clubs that (wrongly, imho) charge single men more, and give Dominant females a break on the fees in order to keep some parity in the numbers. If there were not so many men who have acknowledged their submissiveness, this would not be an issue. If so many women weren't knuckling under to the modern myth (all feminism aside, it still exists) that women cannot be Dominant, they would be able to more freely act on their desires as the men do. The ratio of submissive and Dominant women would probably stabilize to something closer to the males. I suspect that if you tossed gender aside and just polled an equal group of men and women as to where they sat on a Dominance/Submission scale where they KNEW their gender would not be revealed, and then polled an equal number of male and females in separate groups as test groups, I suspect that the ratio of people who view themselves as Dominant would be closer to that of the male only group than the female only group.

But that's just my theory. Unfortunately, I don't have the time or the money to do the great experiment. It's just that, I'm involved in the bdsm community here, and I was on the fringes of the one at home, and I have actually asked my mum about the numbers in their community. (This was right when I first discovered that males in general were charged more in some groups...I was a bit pissed off on their behalf, but that's another rant not really germane to this discussion!) In all three groups, roughly half the PYL's were female, and in the two Canada groups roughly a third of the subs were male in either group. Down here, it's closer to half. Either all three areas have unusually high numbers of FemDoms and malesubs, or the "most women are natural subs and most men are natural Doms" theory doesn't pan out.
 
snowy ciara said:
Look at all the fetish clubs that (wrongly, imho) charge single men more, and give Dominant females a break on the fees in order to keep some parity in the numbers. If there were not so many men who have acknowledged their submissiveness, this would not be an issue. QUOTE]


Swinging dicks will pay to be near pussy. Doesn't matter if it is Dom or sub or nilla.
 
WriterDom said:
snowy ciara said:
Look at all the fetish clubs that (wrongly, imho) charge single men more, and give Dominant females a break on the fees in order to keep some parity in the numbers. If there were not so many men who have acknowledged their submissiveness, this would not be an issue. QUOTE]


Swinging dicks will pay to be near pussy. Doesn't matter if it is Dom or sub or nilla.


lol, this is true.
 
snowy ciara said:
I know several Dominant females and one Male sub pretty well, and based on that experience, I respectfully disagree. I don't think male subs are all that uncommon. Look at all the fetish clubs that (wrongly, imho) charge single men more, and give Dominant females a break on the fees in order to keep some parity in the numbers. If there were not so many men who have acknowledged their submissiveness, this would not be an issue. If so many women weren't knuckling under to the modern myth (all feminism aside, it still exists) that women cannot be Dominant, they would be able to more freely act on their desires as the men do. The ratio of submissive and Dominant women would probably stabilize to something closer to the males. I suspect that if you tossed gender aside and just polled an equal group of men and women as to where they sat on a Dominance/Submission scale where they KNEW their gender would not be revealed, and then polled an equal number of male and females in separate groups as test groups, I suspect that the ratio of people who view themselves as Dominant would be closer to that of the male only group than the female only group.

But that's just my theory. Unfortunately, I don't have the time or the money to do the great experiment. It's just that, I'm involved in the bdsm community here, and I was on the fringes of the one at home, and I have actually asked my mum about the numbers in their community. (This was right when I first discovered that males in general were charged more in some groups...I was a bit pissed off on their behalf, but that's another rant not really germane to this discussion!) In all three groups, roughly half the PYL's were female, and in the two Canada groups roughly a third of the subs were male in either group. Down here, it's closer to half. Either all three areas have unusually high numbers of FemDoms and malesubs, or the "most women are natural subs and most men are natural Doms" theory doesn't pan out.


while Daddy and i don't attend D/s or bdsm functions w/a high number of so-called fem Dominants and male subs, there are usually quit a few around, yes. however, simply because someone says they are a Dom or sub, does not make it so. i have yet to (irl) meet a woman who i could truly say was Dominant, or a male who i could say was submissive. being a bdsm top, or a sadist, does not make one a Dominant person imo. neither does liking to be spanked and told what to do because it makes your cock hard, make you a submissive person. but, because i have never encountered a male sub or fem Dom, does not mean they don't exist. but imo they are certainly few and far btwn.
 
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ownedsubgal said:
while Daddy and i don't attend D/s or bdsm functions w/a high number of so-called fem Dominants and male subs, there are usually quit a few around, yes. however, simply because someone says they are a Dom or sub, does not make it so. i have yet to (irl) meet a woman who i could truly say was Dominant, or a male who i could say was submissive. being a bdsm top, or a sadist, does not make one a Dominant person imo. neither does liking to be spanked and told wat to do because it makes your cock hard, make you a submissive person. but, because i have never encountered a male sub or fem Dom, does not mean they don't exist. but imo they are certainly few and far btwn.
oh? and pray tell, what does make someone submissive and dominant?
 
Aeroil said:
oh? and pray tell, what does make someone submissive and dominant?

i dunno...actually being submissive or dominant? one's personality as opposed to one's fondness for kinky sex? look, all the above are simply my opinions, my beliefs, and my ways which i share w/my Master. i realize most won't agree and that's okay.
 
ownedsubgal said:
i dunno...actually being submissive or dominant? one's personality as opposed to one's fondness for kinky sex? look, all the above are simply my opinions, my beliefs, and my ways which i share w/my Master. i realize most won't agree and that's okay.
if one's not willing to agrue their beliefs.... then why hold them? A belief of mine, there.
I am just curious, some interesting views you have.
 
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