finding the right sub

[satin_coals]

Ok, don't you think it's a tall order, for most women, to give over huge amounts of personal power, to be a very serious submissive and to still have to put you back where she found you at the end of the night?

I'm not saying it's impossible. I'm saying you are now looking for a very particular, poly situation, and that means this is going to be harder than going out and getting laid. A lot harder.

I agree. It definately makes the search a lot harder. Submission, to me, is about giving yourself completely to someone .. and something about having to let my Master go back 'where I found him' every night doesn't appeal to me personally.

But hey, there are plently of females out there and I am not speaking for all of them (perhaps not even a large group or them)

Good luck in your search. The best thing you could do is be honest with all parties involved at all times, which it seems you have done so far.

 

[JMohegan]

Ok, don't you think it's a tall order, for most women, to give over huge amounts of personal power, to be a very serious submissive and to still have to put you back where she found you at the end of the night?

I'm not saying it's impossible. I'm saying you are now looking for a very particular, poly situation, and that means this is going to be harder than going out and getting laid. A lot harder.

I appreciate the logic in your assumption, but disagree with your conclusion.

The oldest line in the Book of Philanderers is: I love my wife very much, but she just can't give me what I need.

Which spawns the oldest cliché in the History of Extra-Marital Affairs: the mistress who convinces herself that her ability to give the married man what he "really needs" will eventually convince him to leave his wife.

Please note that I am not comparing Law_Less or any other married person in a poly relationship to a philanderer. My comments in this post reference the possible mindset of those on the flip side of the coin.

 

[JMohegan]

Submission, to me, is about giving yourself completely to someone .. and something about having to let my Master go back 'where I found him' every night doesn't appeal to me personally.

But hey, there are plently of females out there and I am not speaking for all of them (perhaps not even a large group or them)

A while ago, I saw a thread on this board in which the opening post was a woman asserting her preference for married Dominants due to the obvious limits on what can be expected or demanded from the submissive in such arrangements. The second post on the thread was another woman chiming in to agree.

I don't remember the title of the thread or the people who wrote the posts. I was lurking at the time and had no real sense of the personalities involved. It's possible that they were jesting. OTOH, it's possible that they were sincere.

 

[Law_Less]

thanks

Thank you all of you who have contributed to this thread. Yes I understand that it will take some serious hard work to bothfind a sub and to make it work, but this is important enough to me for me to puy that effort in. I hope that says somethings about my character. This isnt some base fantasy I want to have a go at. It is very real and personal to me and something I need in my life.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I have an online D/s relationship. I met him here. It's the longest online relationship I've had so far but still pretty new. I'm hoping this one will last.

I am also happily (15 years) married.

They both know about one another. I don't feel I can't give them both what they need and want. I love them both.



Fury

I can imagine that would be very easy to do...maintaining healthy relationships in RL with 2 different partners is far more complicated, especially if children become a factor, but even without.

Catalina

 

[satin_coals]

hmmm .. i don't know if i could do it personally .. i'm pretty lazy .. lol

 

[Law_Less]

satin

well satin atleast you are honest. lol

 

[satin_coals]

well satin atleast you are honest. lol

*grins* honesty never hurt anyone .. unless you lied first. heh

 

[Etoile]

maintaining healthy relationships in RL with 2 different partners is far more complicated

And how.

 

[FurryFury]

And how.

*nods*

Good lord, I'm sure it is much more difficult and that many if not most would not be able to do it!

Fury

 

[chris9]

I am sure that someone has posted a similar thread before, but I am new here so please cut me some slack. How do you find a submissive on-line or real life. I have posted adds and responded to to adds and have not gotten anywhere. I know that there are munches and clubs. I would like ot hear from others how they found thier subs and what worked and didnt work for them to make the connection. I do not want to play at being a Dom. I want to find someone serious and well suited for me. I take my rolse seriously and want the same. Any help will be greatly appreciated.

Law

p.s. I live in the central ohio area if you have specific info on clubs or meetings.

Ok, I know it took some time. When reading your post I had thought of a thread about how people here have met, and I had wanted to link you. Only problem was I couldn't find it Finally RJ was able to locate it for me (Thank you! ) so here it is:
How people found their partners