How does one know if they are meant for a Dom/sub lifestyle

Phoenyx said:
Are there any books I can read?

Any books by Gloria Brame are very good. One of them is called Different Loving. You can find them at Borders or Barnes and Noble.
 
re'Ricckk

Ricckk said:
You can learn to act in a dominant or submissive manner (or both), but IMHO it comes from the heart. Most people have always sensed their orientation but for others it has evolved.
_____________________
and when one acts from the Heart they sometimes make hasty often irrational decisions also ..>TRUTH
 
How did I know?
It was something that always called to me. I started to read and realized what I wanted. It's a long and curious path, but it is a fun path to travel. :devil:

Good luck, Phoenyx.


Helena :rose:
 
How did I know

I saw the movie, "The Story of O" and was hooked. I wanted to learn all I could about the subject. About a year after I saw the movie I found the Beauty series and read them. I struggled with my desires for a long time though, I had been in an extremely abusive marriage for 3 years and when I first became interested in BDSM, my then 2nd husband was always telling me how sick I was to have an interest when I had been so abused in my first marriage. Only through self exploration and talking to others who shared my interest and doing alot of reading was I able to take the steps to persue what I wanted.
 
Hello and thanks...

Thanks to whomever asked the question... "How do you know..?"

As you can see, this is my first time to post anything... but I've wanted to ask this question a million times!! I've been reading stories/books for a little over a year, lurking through these threads for a couple of months, and passing many questions through my head.

So, my next question is... how do you find the nerve (or person) to actually move beyond this point??? :confused:
 
If it's really who and what you are, you won't have to find the nerve to try. Read, learn, think, listen to yourself. That's what i did.

After several months, the need to accept my submissiveness and then to seek an outlet for it became so strong that not trying wasn't an option anymore.

Good luck!
 
Re: Hello and thanks...

2shy2try said:
Thanks to whomever asked the question... "How do you know..?"

As you can see, this is my first time to post anything... but I've wanted to ask this question a million times!! I've been reading stories/books for a little over a year, lurking through these threads for a couple of months, and passing many questions through my head.

So, my next question is... how do you find the nerve (or person) to actually move beyond this point??? :confused:

When the need is greater than the fear, you will move forward. You'll know when you're ready. I'm glad to see you posting! Talking to others about this is a good step forward.:cool:
 
You don't know how right you both are!

"move forward" and "seek out"....

I live, work, and shop all within an approximate 5 mile radius. I don't usually venture out to meet new people. Guess "moving forward" and "seeking out" is what I'll need to do...

unless I'm lucky enough to have that *special someone* knock on my front door or walk through the halls of my work site! :heart: LOL... but probably not!:(
 
Re: You don't know how right you both are!

2shy2try said:
"move forward" and "seek out"....

I live, work, and shop all within an approximate 5 mile radius. I don't usually venture out to meet new people. Guess "moving forward" and "seeking out" is what I'll need to do...

unless I'm lucky enough to have that *special someone* knock on my front door or walk through the halls of my work site! :heart: LOL... but probably not!:(

We know darlin'. We've been there. It will get easier over time. :rose:
 
Re: You don't know how right you both are!

"move forward" and "seek out"....
I live, work, and shop all within an approximate 5 mile radius. I don't usually venture out to meet new people. Guess "moving forward" and "seeking out" is what I'll need to do...
unless I'm lucky enough to have that *special someone* knock on my front door or walk through the halls of my work site! :heart: LOL... but probably not!:(

Well, I've been 'lucky' enough to meet some special people that way... however, they consisted of...

(Ex-wife) Chronic Liar
(Ex-mistress) Just wanted to have sex
(Ex-g/f) Very young in maturity
(Ex-fiancee) Nothing in common, except sex

It seems the old adage is true, you get what you pay for. Or, anything worth doing is worth investing time into. :)

I can relate in the sense of enjoying my comfort zone and slowly (talking snail/tortoise speed here...) expanding it. Now has come my time to tear down that zone, save a small portion for my sanity, and expand my world.

When you're ready? You'll find that, too.
 
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