How private are you?

[the captians wench]

Wenchie, I am a little worried about something you said in your original post, though. Allowing first meets to pick you up at your apartment is a bit scary to me. Yes, I've ridden in their car after meeting them, but I never let them know where I live. And maybe it's more because I'm a mom and have my 12yo daughter living with me that I'm so protective of that. And the thought that this person could turn out to be a stalker or worse, if they know where you live it can get scary. Just something to think about, hon.

I know I konw. Not the brightest idea I've ever had. But you know, i tend to be more of a stalker than anyone I've met, so far anyway.

But yeah, i've only done this twice. The first time my cousin lived with me, and would be home shortly. Not that i was actually thinking about that, but some how having him around made me feel more pertected like. That guy had the nerve to lecture me when he left saying "promise me you'll never invite some one you haven't met to your apt again. It's not safe and very foolish" bastard.

The second time was some one I'd been chatting with a lot longer, almost 6 months I think, and we'd talked on the phone a few times. And well, we were just kinda eager to find out if we had the same connection in person. Which we did, and we do. He's a very dear friend to me now, and one who doesn't mind blushing my cheeks when I deserve it or need it.

I know I've been very lucky. And I'd like to say that I'm more careful now, but I'm planing a trip to another country, alone, to meet some one that I've never seen before. So I'm still making choices that seem less than smart. But I always follow my gut. When I have a good feeling about some one, I continue, when I have an odd sick feeling, I don't give out the info.

May not be the best way to go, but it's how I do. *shrug*

 

[liberatedslave]

Online I'm either one of 3 things:

1) The person I've chatted to has no personal information about me and no name. Then I have the freedom to be open about my personality and my life.

2) (This doesn't really apply now I have my Sir) Once I've given some personal personal info like my real name I'll be cautious and I'll run any possible background checks on my correspondee. It's always quid pro quo - I don't give info until I receive personal info about another person.

3) Official stuff. I tend not to do this online if possible because I simply don't trust it. I give the minimum of info at all times and only on very reputable sites.

 

[liberatedslave]

That guy had the nerve to lecture me when he left saying "promise me you'll never invite some one you haven't met to your apt again. It's not safe and very foolish" bastard.

The cheek!

If he'd been any kind of man he'd have suggested an alternative to picking you up from home in order to reassure you that he was concerned, not lecture you after the fact.

I agree, total bastard.

 

[IsabellaSnow]

Im fairly private in this respect.

I have a very uncommon real name - I started using another name (first and last) professionally at 19 and I rarely even THINK of myself as the other name anymore.

With writing, I have yet another name - and I wont even tell people what my other fake-ish name is - let alone the real one, lol.

Cell phone numbers, I dont care.

Home address? After a month of dating, maybe.

I do get in the car too quickly at times, and I do go to other homes too quickly at times.

But mine's off limits.

 

[knkycva]

.....

 

[FurryFury]

I do a lot online. I'm not that paranoid about the Internet. If I were, I wouldn't be a Literotica at all.


I do things for work, home school, communicating with friends and relatives, role playing and now, erotic things. I understand that I could be possibly be traced by someone. That could cost me my job and to an extent my standing in the community. I exercise what I consider proper safety because of that. Yet nothing is foolproof and there are ways.

I'm not willing to give up or refrain from doing things online that could put me in a bad place later. I WILL live my life how I see fit. If someone causes problems I'll deal with it.

*shrugs*

Fury

 

[chris9]

I think I'm too open online. A stalker could probably find me.
I don't give out my address or last name, unless it's a one-on-one situation where I sort of know the other person and trust them. Only two persons from online know my last name, only one my address and cell phone number.

I'm less hesistant with giving my cell phone number than my address. It's not too hard to change the cell phone number, to hang up when people call me I don't want to call me. If a stalker appears and has my address, moving is my only possibility. And I'm not a big fan of moving...

 

[bridgeburner]

People could find me if they wanted to, but, honestly, who's looking for me?

The thing I most want to avoid is junk mail.

 

[leeroy jenkins]

People could find me if they wanted to, but, honestly, who's looking for me?

The thing I most want to avoid is junk mail.

Does that mean I can hunt you down M'Lady??

 

[babiesmiles]

I am very open in off line situations and with friends in general . But one has to gain my trust before. Then I have very few secrets ( ok maybe there is a part of my life I keep private ..lol ).

Online I am very cautious and I think there are just 5 or 6 people all over the several boards I usually write on ( some are technically related to my job ) who know my real name and among them maybe 4 know my last name, address and mobile number . Although I quietly talk on these boards about my everyday life , health , my job and whatever I feel right to talk.

I don't pay accounts nor make bank operations online and if I have to buy something , mainly books or music , I use a chargeable limited amount credit card I made only to buy online . I don't even have a crowded IM cause I like to talk to people whom I really feel close with . I think it is more a matter of selective use of the time I spend online than a matter of privacy though .

I don't feel paranoid and some among my really dear friends I met online first and then I met off line too with brilliant results.

When I decide to pass from the online stage to the offline one usually I trust these people enough to let them know more about me as they trust me in the same way . So it is a mutual exchange . And I must say it worked fine for me so far.

 

[Arianna22]

Hmmmm... I think I'm probably too open. On Lit I use a false name (but one that has significance) but then if I speak to someone I usually end up chatting via my email address and MSN which is with my real name and I tell them anyway!

Also if you put my real name through a google search you come up with my work webpage which has where i work and my school grades,work ex and everything, inlcuding pictures!

So, I'm probably too open. But then i hate not telling people who I am and things like that, it just doesnt seem natural for me not too... maybe I'm odd.

But then i always trust people too quickly too... i always saidI trust people until they prove me wrong, and whilst someone burnt me with this policy once, i decided to change would mean that he had won, so I stayed open. i may get hurt and into trouble sometimes, but generally its who i am.

 

[LordHawk]

I use fake names and addresses for signing up for email and shit online. I was Jack Beam once and Jim Daniels another time. I just use the real name for something professional or work related.

 

[Lorelei_11]

You mean I'm not the only one? Well, there's a PDF of a Chamber of Commerce Newsletter that mentions my name, but that's it.

But no, not paranoid. Reasonably cautious, but not paranoid. See my face over to the left, there? Not worried about it. Someone wants to find me, IP address sniffers are easy.

(Conversation hijack)

That pretty much sums up how I feel too. I'm not paranoid, but cautious. I've given 3 people my full name and address here on lit. I knew them well. One person has passed away now.

 

[Master_n_Mentor]

When I know people, meet them face to face, I have no problem telling them who I am, what I do, etc. However, My many years in the land of computing, heading an e-commerce security function, I've come to realize that there are a number of people that can do amazingly scary things to rob Y/you of your identity. That has caused My duality; online, I'm very VERY private.

 

[Kailey_86]

How private am i? Definately not as private as i should be. i trust people way too easily sometimes. i have been hurt in the past because of this. Luckily it wasn't anything too serious. i have to work on keeping my mouth shut sometimes. Some things should just be kept to myself.