internet subs and doms???

[bustyblondebombshell]

Esclava,

I couldn't have said it better if I had tried. Thankyou for vocalising the thoughts I found but did not speak!



BBBx.

 

[Devra]

This is my first post,and I'm extremely new to D/s, so please be kind
This may not be an answer to the question, its just my experience and what its done for me.
I am currently living with a man that I have been in a relationship with for 20 years, this is a "normal" relationship. (I don't wish to offend, but I'm not sure what a non D/s is referred to) We have become "stale" and although I care for him deeply I can see a split happening in my future. I'm 51 and have been told that I'm still as attractive as I was in my 20's. The thoughts of being bound and dominated have been in my fantasies for years but never gave it any thought to actually act on it.
Though an online game I met a wonderful young man (he's 27) about 3 years ago, we hit it off and have become friends... that is, until about 3 months ago. I'm happy to say he is now my Master. He fully knows who I am, my age, my relationship, I have been totally honest with him as he has been with me. We know that we will never meet, which is a bit sad, but that is the reality.
What this relationship has done for me... I have in 3 months become more confident in myself, secure in the knowledge that my Master cares for me. Simple things like telling me how to dress each day has made me a happier person... I know I'm dressing for my Master and him alone. He has opened my eyes to something I didn't realize I wanted. As I once said to him, its like putting a name to a sickness you didn't know you had.
I don't know how long this relationship will last, I would really like to see him find a woman his own age who will make him happy. For now I will enjoy this new experience and continue to glow. When the day comes that he tells me he has found that woman, I will be ready to find a Master that I hope is just like him.

Devra

 

[wolf2002]

This may not be an answer to the question, its just my experience and what its done for me.

Welcome on this board Devra, your first post is a beautiful one... just like you, online has been a outlet for my D/s desires... I can very well relate to the way you describe your situation... I wouldn;t call it a sickness though, it is an urge that all members of this board feel and which is hardly accepted by society... for those amongst us that for some reason can;t live the 'real' life, online is a great alternative...

 

[tn_greeneyez]

Derva,

Having myself lived in a very "vanilla" relationship for nearly 30 years, I understand completely what you are saying. Also, I am a relative "newbie" to D/s, having only discovered about a year ago my long repressed urge to submit in a sexual manner.

My experience has been in real life more than online, although I did meet the Dom who has been guiding me in my journey online. We discovered that we are near one another, and, well.......things progressed.

I've found a wonderful new understanding of myself through this journey. I, too, as you, have an increased confidence, and have throughly enjoyed my learning process thus far.

It isn't a sickness.........*smile*........it's an adventure.

Enjoy!

 

[Lord Crimson]

As with most other things in life, what you get from a relationship is often dictated by what you put into it. Finding the right partner is the key. Lucky for us, He found me!

you are correct laci, We are lucky We found Us.

I have been in two R/T experiences. I would not trade anything for either of them. Both of My girls were good slaves, and one has gone on to make her own family and we still stay in touch.

But the situation I found Myself in, did not lend itself to be a R/T Dom/Master but I felt I needed to be back in the Lifestytle. It has been very fulfilling for Me to teach laci the Lifestyle. She has made the transition from non BDSM back to the Lifestyle as much fun as one old Master could wish for.

What I term as "Our world" has a very deep meaning for Us. I trust her completely to carry out My orders, and the few times when she as not completed a task as I have wished - well as in R/T she is punished - fortuntley those times have been few.

But to answer the question - is an Online relationship possible?

A resounding Yes is My answer - but like it has been posted here and in other threads - You have to want it to succeed - but that is true even in R/T

Yes laci, We are lucky We found Us.

Lord Crimson

 

[RadicalFlower]

This is my first post,and I'm extremely new to D/s, so please be kind
This may not be an answer to the question, its just my experience and what its done for me.
I am currently living with a man that I have been in a relationship with for 20 years, this is a "normal" relationship. (I don't wish to offend, but I'm not sure what a non D/s is referred to) We have become "stale" and although I care for him deeply I can see a split happening in my future. I'm 51 and have been told that I'm still as attractive as I was in my 20's. The thoughts of being bound and dominated have been in my fantasies for years but never gave it any thought to actually act on it.
Though an online game I met a wonderful young man (he's 27) about 3 years ago, we hit it off and have become friends... that is, until about 3 months ago. I'm happy to say he is now my Master. He fully knows who I am, my age, my relationship, I have been totally honest with him as he has been with me. We know that we will never meet, which is a bit sad, but that is the reality.
What this relationship has done for me... I have in 3 months become more confident in myself, secure in the knowledge that my Master cares for me. Simple things like telling me how to dress each day has made me a happier person... I know I'm dressing for my Master and him alone. He has opened my eyes to something I didn't realize I wanted. As I once said to him, its like putting a name to a sickness you didn't know you had.
I don't know how long this relationship will last, I would really like to see him find a woman his own age who will make him happy. For now I will enjoy this new experience and continue to glow. When the day comes that he tells me he has found that woman, I will be ready to find a Master that I hope is just like him.

Devra

Hi And Welcome.!! *waves*
.i know how you feel i Am married and dont see myself a slave for my husband at all i dont know why..and i have meet many men on here that have helped and provided me with what the Journey would be like and i like it ..we have grown apart..but as you i care about him SO MUCH..I just dont see him Providing that Journey for me...And it is Confusing ..Cause i dont understand why i cant see that.

 

[Gentle Baron]

There are predators out here, but there are also fabulous people who will help you find - not only yourself - but perhaps the love of your life. I wish you luck in both!

Esclava

I couldn't agree more........Those predators are wannabes and lack the knowledge of what this Lifestyle is about.........

 

[Kajira Callista]

I couldn't agree more........Those predators are wannabes and lack the knowledge of what this Lifestyle is about.........

hmmm too me there is a difference between predator and wanna be. predators seek out and destroy submission for their own pleasure and wannabes just dont have the knowledge yet, doesnt mean they arent Dom, just means they are learning

 

[SwtSouthrnSub]

.

 

[Lord Crimson]

LC, I find your post very interesting.

But the situation I found Myself in, did not lend itself to be a R/T Dom/Master but I felt I needed to be back in the Lifestytle. It has been very fulfilling for Me to teach laci the Lifestyle. She has made the transition from non BDSM back to the Lifestyle as much fun as one old Master could wish for.

I'm curious... if the situation that you found yourself in didn't lend itself to a fulltime D/s relationship, how did you get there? Did you become involved in a relationship that was vanilla, or one that had a promise of D/s that moved too slowly towards what you desired in that relationship? I'm asking this sincerely.

Are you still involved in the other relationship, or is Laci the only one that has your attention today?

Looking at your signature line, I must admit that I am confused. I hope that an old Master would be kind enough to inform his SO if he was having an outside relationship. I'm not attempting to judge you, just curious what your signature line means.

~Swt~

The situation I found Myself in is that I am married, and My wife is not interested in the Lifestyle at all (we have been married for over thirty years). I am sure she was aware of My first two girls, she choose to ignore it. One evening while visiting a photography board I met a girl and we developed a relationship concerning our hobby. It came to pass, and I really do not remember who brought up the subject, that she was having an online Lifestyle experience - while married. I chatted with her for over two months and at her insistance I checked out Lit. and after lurking for another couple of months I made a post - laci answered and as you might say - the rest is history. I hope this has cleared up any confusing points - and I am sorry for the delay answering your question.

Have a good day

Lord Crimson,

 

[shelleb4]

This is a very pertinent thread for me. Ive been trying an online thing, and it leaves me cold. Nothing!
Now i love the literary word, i love to read the stories here and they get me very hot, (specially Catalina's)
But it seems to me that I get my assignment, i complete it, send it back, get no feedback, get sent the next assignment etc etc.

Obviously there is no physical contact within these relationships, so its hampered. This must put enormous pressure on the Dom/me to be very creative with the mind play. Yet, not knowing me, how can that be possible?

Yet clearly many others find this medium beneficial, and good luck to them. For those who arent able to obtain realife, this is a good substitute.

If my so or i are parted, and we communicated in a online relationship, this has worked fine. Full arousal achieved no problems.

Chat rooms are just peculiar - i visit a chat room where one of the ops cybers in the main room, but at the same time acting as op, so you get "Oh that feels so good Master. Hi Hot4U, age, sex & location for the room please". How mad is that?

For me, it just doesnt cut it.

 

[Esclava]

This is a very pertinent thread for me. Ive been trying an online thing, and it leaves me cold. Nothing!
Now i love the literary word, i love to read the stories here and they get me very hot, (specially Catalina's)
But it seems to me that I get my assignment, i complete it, send it back, get no feedback, get sent the next assignment etc etc.

Obviously there is no physical contact within these relationships, so its hampered. This must put enormous pressure on the Dom/me to be very creative with the mind play. Yet, not knowing me, how can that be possible?

Yet clearly many others find this medium beneficial, and good luck to them. For those who arent able to obtain realife, this is a good substitute.

If my so or i are parted, and we communicated in a online relationship, this has worked fine. Full arousal achieved no problems.

Chat rooms are just peculiar - i visit a chat room where one of the ops cybers in the main room, but at the same time acting as op, so you get "Oh that feels so good Master. Hi Hot4U, age, sex & location for the room please". How mad is that?

For me, it just doesnt cut it.

You hit the nail on the head, Shelleb4. It has MUCH to do with the mindfuck that goes on in the head of the sub. I venture a guess that those with more intuitive/perceiving personalities have an easier time convincing themselves that what they see in their mind's eye and feel (with their hands acting in the stead of another's), is very real.

That's not to say that others cannot make it work. It just takes real .... well, .... work to make it happen. IMO, LD and/or online IS much better than nothing at all; but all parties involved must be "singing from the same sheet of music" for the melody and harmony to sound like a thing of beauty.

Esclava