Kinky Poems

[Trixareforkids]

ha,ha,ha ms. code breaker, I'm going to throw something at you, I assume you know the difference between signal and noise. Jamming and counter measures. Poetry is not all that different.

Why is the mind "salty"? Is it because ocean was there?

LOL, did you not see the part where I skipped out on the job and the Navy?

LOVE Hedy Lamar, and I'd read this elsewhere after looking up some stuff from a TedTalk.

Ok, back on point. Signal (information)/noise (no information). Jamming (blocking information)/counter measures (bad/misleading information ?).

And I never claimed to be a code breaker. The ASVAB said I had the aptitude for it. Attitude is a whole 'nother story Just 'cause ya can, don't mean ya wanna.

Here, I wanna, so I'm a trying. Oh, and the salty mind stands without the ocean, maybe better for it's absence.

 

[Trixareforkids]

Hi ya Pelegrino,

Are ya throwing Forwarding in here to work out kinks or just because of the thread title and your first line?

 

[pelegrino]

Hi ya Pelegrino,

Are ya throwing Forwarding in here to work out kinks or just because of the thread title and your first line?

Hi Trix!
Because of all three you mentioned, but the kinkiest on my part is the first.

 

[Trixareforkids]

Hi Trix!
Because of all three you mentioned, but the kinkiest on my part is the first.

My first question is what's the underlying thought? It sort of feels like a 'just let me be' message, but in a disjointed fashion.

First comment, the near rhyme in S1 feels too off to me "whore moans" would work better I think or "sermons". Whore moans implies grumbling where hormones doesn't to me.

Second comment, S3 just doesn't work for me. Maybe, "driving" which implies driven as well as in being in control of what direction your taking, which would contrast better with being schooling which implies being driven by an outside goal.

S4, took two reads for me, but then the cleverness of the wordplay made me smile. Me likey

 

[twelveoone]

LOL, did you not see the part where I skipped out on the job and the Navy?

LOVE Hedy Lamar, and I'd read this elsewhere after looking up some stuff from a TedTalk.

Ok, back on point. Signal (information)/noise (no information). Jamming (blocking information)/counter measures (bad/misleading information ?).

And I never claimed to be a code breaker. The ASVAB said I had the aptitude for it. Attitude is a whole 'nother story Just 'cause ya can, don't mean ya wanna.

Here, I wanna, so I'm a trying. Oh, and the salty mind stands without the ocean, maybe better for it's absence.

why is the mind salty?

 

[pelegrino]

My first question is what's the underlying thought? It sort of feels like a 'just let me be' message, but in a disjointed fashion.

First comment, the near rhyme in S1 feels too off to me "whore moans" would work better I think or "sermons". Whore moans implies grumbling where hormones doesn't to me.

Second comment, S3 just doesn't work for me. Maybe, "driving" which implies driven as well as in being in control of what direction your taking, which would contrast better with being schooling which implies being driven by an outside goal.

S4, took two reads for me, but then the cleverness of the wordplay made me smile. Me likey

Oh, no!
It was not meant as a "let me be" message, only as a "play with me" one.
I like your comments and in terms of versification they'd probably make a poem out of it. But ... I respect too much "whore moans", I could not have a world without them, whereas I could do well without what I say: without some hormones.
Thanks for the advise, much appreciated!

 

[Trixareforkids]

why is the mind salty?

Hmm, just went to link to the slang definition and what's listed is not how I use it. Salty in the way it was used as slang where I grew up meant horny/kinky/lewd.

As I could find no reference to that online it must have been a local thing. Well shit. Now I need another word.

Ok, definitely getting shelved for a while.

 

[twelveoone]

Hmm, just went to link to the slang definition and what's listed is not how I use it. Salty in the way it was used as slang where I grew up meant horny/kinky/lewd.

As I could find no reference to that online it must have been a local thing. Well shit. Now I need another word.

Ok, definitely getting shelved for a while.

OK, there must be another layer. Maybe I wasn't that far off in my rewrite. The shit I threw at you with Hedy, was easy stuff.
With poetry, it is a game of what do want the audience to see when? Hiding in the noise.
Or am I talking out of my ass again?

 

[Trixareforkids]

OK, there must be another layer. Maybe I wasn't that far off in my rewrite. The shit I threw at you with Hedy, was easy stuff.
With poetry, it is a game of what do want the audience to see when? Hiding in the noise.
Or am I talking out of my ass again?

Well you can be a pain in my ass backward brain
But it's the kind of pain that hold promise
Of something good if you can just push through it
And this feels like it belongs on the Temple of Ass

 

[champagne1982]

Hmm, just went to link to the slang definition and what's listed is not how I use it. Salty in the way it was used as slang where I grew up meant horny/kinky/lewd.

As I could find no reference to that online it must have been a local thing. Well shit. Now I need another word.

Ok, definitely getting shelved for a while.

Marine Corps Dictionary:
Salty
Top
Home >Library >History, Politics & Society >Marine Corps Dictionary
Referring to someone or something with a lot of experience, particularly at sea. A salty Marine is one who has been around a while. A salty uniform is more faded and obviously used but still sharp. Salty language is language salted with profanities or obscenities


Read more: http://www.answers.com/topic/salty#ixzz3BpxLKCGY

 

[Trixareforkids]

That's it Champ, thank you! I spent quite a bit of time rooting around the internet looking and didn't find it.

 

[Trixareforkids]

Oh, no!
It was not meant as a "let me be" message, only as a "play with me" one.
I like your comments and in terms of versification they'd probably make a poem out of it. But ... I respect too much "whore moans", I could not have a world without them, whereas I could do well without what I say: without some hormones.
Thanks for the advise, much appreciated!

So, what feels kinky to you?

 

[Mropietaylor69]

Sorry.

 

[Trixareforkids]

Hi there M.

Welcome to (or back to?) the PoBos. I liked your piece.

This thread is for pieces you feel have problems that you want help working out though, lol. So you might want to move yours over to Everyday Erotica, Just Porn or the Sudden Passion threads if you're not looking to have it de-kinked.