Life Is Beautiful

[Tsotha]

I sit in silence
and do not dream. Emptiness
is a comfort so I still myself
in the deafening void. Thoughts
arise like waves that roll over
and away from me.

I am more than my thoughts,
more than this mind I am
the universe of dark and light
and a nameless particle
within it. I embrace
my silence. It is mine it is
Innisfree.

This is beautiful, Angeline.

Both (Trix and yours) were beautiful; thank you.

 

[Angeline]

This is beautiful, Angeline.

Both (Trix and yours) were beautiful; thank you.

Thank you. It's just true: the way I feel when I meditate. It's my natural high lol.

 

[pelegrino]

I agree with the title of this thread. Life is beautiful. I only want to add that it can be even more beautiful when you know what is not beautiful in it.
Sorry, Tsotha, if I'm repeating what you said.

 

[Angeline]

If the blues aren't an example of the duality in beauty, I don't know what is. The way these old guys play can bring me to tears because of the depth and beauty of their blues.

 

[Trixareforkids]

This is beautiful, Angeline.

Both (Trix and yours) were beautiful; thank you.

Thank you Tsotha, and I agree, beautiful Angeline!

 

[Trixareforkids]

If the blues aren't an example of the duality in beauty, I don't know what is. The way these old guys play can bring me to tears because of the depth and beauty of their blues.

And in honor of the great lady's passing, one of my favorite bits of her work...

The blues may be the life you've led
Or midnight hours in
An empty bed.

 

[Angeline]

And in honor of the great lady's passing, one of my favorite bits of her work...

The blues may be the life you've led
Or midnight hours in
An empty bed.

Beautiful indeed as she was.

 

[Trixareforkids]

I had trouble written all over me
Down to my DNA
I was ready to set off
Elbows to asshole into the night
I never looked for trouble
But somehow I always found myself
Smack dab in the middle of it
Then you came along
Looking for a blond piece of ass
She blew you off and
Made me laugh
The rest as they say
Is history
And what a history
Lots of love and laughter
A few tears and tears
But you calmed me
Quieted the buzzing in my head
The itch to move on down
Move on down the road
I've loved you for that
I've hated you for that
For that quiet in my head
The inability to hear the whispers
They need static to speak through
And you, you always cleared the channel
I was close a time or two
Close to leaving
Close to hunting them down
Until you made your final play
She's beautiful don't you think.

 

[Trixareforkids]

And But

Ugh! Can somebody PLEASE help me with all the ands and buts in the piece above/ below. I've gone over it a couple of times now and I just can't seem to get rid of them. If someone could hack away I'd appreciate it.

 

[twelveoone]

Things which cannot be celebrated. Things which are ugly and cannot be changed. Fighting a losing battle and having no hope, or worse, no hope for gaining hope. Having nothing beautiful to lose, or worse, to gain. Losing something beautiful. Being trapped in a situation which cannot be improved. Being trapped inside a situation which is ugly, but you have no perspective or strength to free yourself. Too many things to list.

Heh, I guess I'm the Grinch in this thread, now.

the yellow snow comes unbidden
and with the crabs, I'm ridden
oh, what a lovely day!
Just thought
I'd have to say!

 

[twelveoone]

I had trouble written all over me
Down to my DNA
I was ready to set off
Elbows to asshole into the night
I never looked for trouble
But somehow I always found myself
Smack dab in the middle of it
Then you came along
Looking for a blond piece of ass
She blew you off and
Made me laugh
The rest as they say
Is history
And what a history
Lots of love and laughter
A few tears and tears
But you calmed me
Quieted the buzzing in my head
The itch to move on down
Move on down the road
I've loved you for that
I've hated you for that
For that quiet in my head
The inability to hear the whispers
They need static to speak through
And you, you always cleared the channel
I was close a time or two
Close to leaving
Close to hunting them down
Until you made your final play
She's beautiful don't you think.

Think, in bold, obvious
italics, questionable

but I like the last line

whoops all in italics and bold, now

 

[Trixareforkids]

the yellow snow comes unbidden
and with the crabs, I'm ridden
oh, what a lovely day!
Just thought
I'd have to say!

Hey, I've met this guy! Gave him a fiver for some Mad Dog.

 

[Trixareforkids]

Think, in bold, obvious
italics, questionable

but I like the last line

whoops all in italics and bold, now

UGH! You say obvious but I remain oblivious!

It's the old pun, "you can lead a whore to water, but you can't make her think"

And for more random obscura, "it my life. Don't you get it? It my fucking life!" I'm not being metaphorical, not here anywhore.

 

[twelveoone]

I had trouble written all over me
Down to my DNA
I was ready to set off
Elbows to asshole into the night
I never looked for trouble
But somehow I always found myself
Smack dab in the middle of it
Then you came along
Looking for a blond piece of ass
She blew you off and
Made me laugh
The rest as they say
Is history
And what a history
Lots of love and laughter
A few tears and tears
But you calmed me
Quieted the buzzing in my head
The itch to move on down
Move on down the road
I've loved you for that
I've hated you for that
For that quiet in my head
The inability to hear the whispers
They need static to speak through
And you, you always cleared the channel
I was close a time or two
Close to leaving
Close to hunting them down
Until you made your final play
She's beautiful don't you think.

Bold = cliche
italics = questionable

what you have is an amusing story, with a nice ending. it is a one shot, a drive through. You do not have enough of an offset, i.e. nothing to stop the audience from plowing though, nothing really for them to go back to.

Now the material itself demands a certain amount of cliche, but try to put it in a more interesting way. You are assigning the worst of it to the speaker.

 

[Trixareforkids]

.....

 

[todski28]

Happiness is like that too hot chick
with her breasts thrust out lust in her mouth
as she whispers what you want to hear
a fleeting moment fulfilled
followed by the hollowed ringing slap
of rejection
as she sways away with your beer

 

[Trixareforkids]

.....

 

[MichaelinChina]

Ugh! Can somebody PLEASE help me with all the ands and buts in the piece above/ below. I've gone over it a couple of times now and I just can't seem to get rid of them. If someone could hack away I'd appreciate it.

and don't forget the "for's"...

 

[Trixareforkids]

and don't forget the "for's"...

Hey! You're not supposed to point out the flaws unless you know how to fix them.:caning:

 

[MichaelinChina]

Hey! You're not supposed to point out the flaws unless you know how to fix them.:caning:

not my job!

 

[Trixareforkids]

.....

 

[MichaelinChina]

Job you say?
No job do I see?
You're just wannabe
Aristocracy
Sit on your throne
With your head in a tome
Looking only to find
Those in a bind
To twist their chain
for your amusements gain

Well now, little china doll
You picked on the wrong moll
Come along and yank
MY chain
You'll find I bite
Deep, to the vein
I'll suck up your blue
And swallow it down
Then dart out like a snake
And steal your crown.

Impressive! Do you do Christmas Crackers too?

 

[Trixareforkids]

.....

 

[Trixareforkids]

1201, looking back I just realized I failed to thank you for the analysis. Though I haven't figured out what to do with it yet, I do appreciate it. I've set it to simmer while I figure out how to incorporate it in the piece below and elsewhere.

 

[butters]

how strange to think i have something to thank him for
after all these years
because all his ugly
means all your wonderful
shines
so so brightly
and i dare to stare straight ahead
into your light
unafraid
sans shades