We're all
Gay
As long as
We're
Doing
What
Makes us
Most
Happy
Ha made my face gay -ly smile
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We're all
Gay
As long as
We're
Doing
What
Makes us
Most
Happy
You don't 'get' my last piece?
She held up her hand,
and declared:
“That’s five!”
“Hey!” she squealed,
Holding up her other hand,
“That’s five too!”
“Good!” I said.
“And if you put them together,
what do you get?”
“A butterfly!” she beamed.
And I envied this four-year old her poetry,
because all I saw was 10.
She held up her hand,
and declared:
“That’s five!”
“Hey!” she squealed,
Holding up her other hand,
“That’s five too!”
“Good!” I said.
“And if you put them together,
what do you get?”
“A butterfly!” she beamed.
And I envied this four-year old her poetry,
because all I saw was 10.
I was honest about the process of creating the 'art'.. PS is semi-legit, but no manipulation is put on a pedestal.
Uh, every form of art is manipulation. Wood to, well so many things. Paint to a picture. Words into a story or poem. It's manipulation that is representing itself as candid or untouched that gets bashed. Even a candid photograph is a manipulation of time...
You almost sound like bogusagain saying that
i happen to be exceedingly busy with life right now - so perfunctory is as perfunctory does. there are poets here who've spent an awful lot of time and effort polishing and editing and repolishing pieces i've yet to find time to comment on. why would i spend excessive amount of time on yours, or anyone's, that's just thrown out there unless it really appealed to me? yours was, to my taste, ok - the first half way better than the second. and while you're about it, appearing to demand feedback when i don't see you particularly forthcoming yourself in that dept. is inappropriate.please let's not argue about comma placement pullleaase!!
It's original at least...I am rather proud of it..as a rough draft of something bigger...perhaps.
Very perfunctory reply if I may so say...
as in this response: - the best way to get feedback from others is to give something of your own time - not just throw a piece out there (which any of us can and sometimes do) and expect others to go out of their way to critique/discuss it.You don't 'get' my last piece?
now this is a way better write. the colour sucks, but the write's got the stamp of authenticity, is playful, wistful, has shadows... nicely done.She held up her hand,
and declared:
“That’s five!”
“Hey!” she squealed,
Holding up her other hand,
“That’s five too!”
“Good!” I said.
“And if you put them together,
what do you get?”
“A butterfly!” she beamed.
And I envied this four-year old her poetry,
because all I saw was 10.
gee thanks. 'has shadows'? how effing pretentious is that????
witful is a word? and ..'the write'? what language is this?
deleted comment...not worth it! oh what the hell...your comments stink of precious!
i wont slam the door on the way out...
bang!
ok I lied...sue me!
The words we say
The things we see
The people we meet
If a knock to the head
Can erase them all
Did they ever exist