Meeting People from Online, In Real time
- Thread starter Spanktress
- Start date
Vinny
"Baghdaddy"
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- Nov 15, 2001
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- 5,398
Re: Re: getting personal
So taking it from your posts, I can see you had some good times with the people that you had met. I myself was thinking of meeting some people as I am married as well. But like some of the other posts, I think it is important to know the people first and definately speak to them on the phone first. Maybe someday soon.
So taking it from your posts, I can see you had some good times with the people that you had met. I myself was thinking of meeting some people as I am married as well. But like some of the other posts, I think it is important to know the people first and definately speak to them on the phone first. Maybe someday soon.
Spanktress
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Nov 13, 2001
- Posts
- 157
Win some Lose Some !!
Jenny, please go right ahead with posting my LDR experience on your thread. As you can probably tell I'm new & cant do some things yet !!
JimXO , thank you. You sum up how I feel about meeting anybody from online now. I dont mean that I enter the meeting in a negative way, just remember that just because its a great online relationship/connection we have, it may not necessarily be that way in real time! Best wishes to you & your wife for a long happy fulfilling life together.
Vinny, good luck. You have the right idea, know the person as well as you can via online contact. Good one for me, is to go with gut instinct, If it doesnt feel right, dont do it & trust that feeling.
*~* Spanks *~*
Jenny, please go right ahead with posting my LDR experience on your thread. As you can probably tell I'm new & cant do some things yet !!
JimXO , thank you. You sum up how I feel about meeting anybody from online now. I dont mean that I enter the meeting in a negative way, just remember that just because its a great online relationship/connection we have, it may not necessarily be that way in real time! Best wishes to you & your wife for a long happy fulfilling life together.
Vinny, good luck. You have the right idea, know the person as well as you can via online contact. Good one for me, is to go with gut instinct, If it doesnt feel right, dont do it & trust that feeling.
*~* Spanks *~*
JennyOmanHill
trying hard to be mindful
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2001
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- 11,151
Thanks Spanktress
Thanks for permission to copy your comments.
And I agree that going with your gut feelings is very important as well.
Thanks for permission to copy your comments.
And I agree that going with your gut feelings is very important as well.
justforhelltoo
Experienced
- Joined
- Nov 21, 2001
- Posts
- 49
Met several - some good, some not
I am a 43 year old woman living in central Illinois and I have been using personal ads since early this year and I have met several men from these services. One turned into something longer term and then the worst thing I did was while we were arguing over something trivial I met someone else through the ads and - well, to put it bluntly - I was sitting at my house on a Saturday afternoon and I was horny - so I IM's this guy that I had seen his persoal ad a few days before and I told him I was coming to his town to visit that nite. He didnt turn me down, so we made plans and ended up having a nice evening out - and then when we got home, well, we screwed our brains out - and the next morning I full intended on making a swift exit and going home to my LTR, but that isnt exactly how it turned out - I ended up seeing this new man for three weeks and THEN I went back to my LTR. But, that didnt work out either, so I am back to looking and have two meetings set up for weekends to follow.
I am a 43 year old woman living in central Illinois and I have been using personal ads since early this year and I have met several men from these services. One turned into something longer term and then the worst thing I did was while we were arguing over something trivial I met someone else through the ads and - well, to put it bluntly - I was sitting at my house on a Saturday afternoon and I was horny - so I IM's this guy that I had seen his persoal ad a few days before and I told him I was coming to his town to visit that nite. He didnt turn me down, so we made plans and ended up having a nice evening out - and then when we got home, well, we screwed our brains out - and the next morning I full intended on making a swift exit and going home to my LTR, but that isnt exactly how it turned out - I ended up seeing this new man for three weeks and THEN I went back to my LTR. But, that didnt work out either, so I am back to looking and have two meetings set up for weekends to follow.
JennyOmanHill
trying hard to be mindful
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2001
- Posts
- 11,151
Good luck, Justforhelltoo
My situation began not as a search, just for "entertaiment" (thinking a few hours of chat couldn't "hurt"!). Now I feel as if it's the best thing to happen to me!
Interesting to realize that others use these forums specifically to meet people, and I wish you luck on your journey!
My situation began not as a search, just for "entertaiment" (thinking a few hours of chat couldn't "hurt"!). Now I feel as if it's the best thing to happen to me!
Interesting to realize that others use these forums specifically to meet people, and I wish you luck on your journey!
tn_8tiv
Just Me
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2001
- Posts
- 25,277
I met my current sweetheart on line and believe me, it's the greatest thing that ever happened. We are soooo compatible, both mentally and sexually. Before her, I had a couple of experiences with online friends but the meeting left me cold
So, personally one out of three isn't bad when the one that you find is as good as my wonderful lover!!!!!
Hope everyone can find one for themselves.
So, personally one out of three isn't bad when the one that you find is as good as my wonderful lover!!!!!
Hope everyone can find one for themselves.
Dragonette
I am Dragon, make me purr
- Joined
- Mar 29, 2001
- Posts
- 6,295
One really bad one
I have a few personals over the web in different sites. I have met a few men over the years, but no one special so far, but I have made many good friends. They were as I thought - as they said, just no chemistry, no physical attraction (not for me anyway, they were interested) Most are still good friends.
There was one I met, luckily in town, who really scared me!
I always meet in town first!
I had chatted to him for quite a while online, he seemed ok, but when I met him! Made me shudder, he was really weird!
I couldn’t leave straight away, I was scared of being rude, that’s how bad it was!
My instincts must have gone on holiday with that one!
This was about 3 or 4 months ago, I received an email from him again the other day, asking if I remembered him and would I like to go out again! <Shakes head>
I had emailed him and said sorry, I don’t think we are compatible. I had to be polite because he did scare me!
Did I remember him? How could I forget!!!!!
Two nights after I met him, there was something strange in my street at 2am. A cars horn kept hooting and a male was yelling, it may not have been him (it was about 3 houses down) but I feel it was.
I thought I had a stalker, he was really weird!!!!!!
I still shudder to think about him.
Luckily that is the only really bad one!
I don't scare easily..............
I have a few personals over the web in different sites. I have met a few men over the years, but no one special so far, but I have made many good friends. They were as I thought - as they said, just no chemistry, no physical attraction (not for me anyway, they were interested) Most are still good friends.
There was one I met, luckily in town, who really scared me!
I always meet in town first!
I had chatted to him for quite a while online, he seemed ok, but when I met him! Made me shudder, he was really weird!
I couldn’t leave straight away, I was scared of being rude, that’s how bad it was!
My instincts must have gone on holiday with that one!
This was about 3 or 4 months ago, I received an email from him again the other day, asking if I remembered him and would I like to go out again! <Shakes head>
I had emailed him and said sorry, I don’t think we are compatible. I had to be polite because he did scare me!
Did I remember him? How could I forget!!!!!
Two nights after I met him, there was something strange in my street at 2am. A cars horn kept hooting and a male was yelling, it may not have been him (it was about 3 houses down) but I feel it was.
I thought I had a stalker, he was really weird!!!!!!
I still shudder to think about him.
Luckily that is the only really bad one!
I don't scare easily..............
JennyOmanHill
trying hard to be mindful
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2001
- Posts
- 11,151
Meeting Online Buddies
Hi again Spanktress.
Thanks once more for your warm responses on the LDR thread.
Thought I'd try to take your thread to a slightly different path.
Living in NYC, I have recently had several opportunities to meet small groups of lit acquaintances (not for coupling purposes), but to be honest, I still feel a little intimidated! To most people groups would seem safer, but my insecurities now have me feeling that meeting one-on-one with a buddy would make it easier for me. Any thoughts on why I feel this way?
And yet I have no hesitation and would meet Oman today if I could!
Confusing, huh?
Hi again Spanktress.
Thanks once more for your warm responses on the LDR thread.
Thought I'd try to take your thread to a slightly different path.
Living in NYC, I have recently had several opportunities to meet small groups of lit acquaintances (not for coupling purposes), but to be honest, I still feel a little intimidated! To most people groups would seem safer, but my insecurities now have me feeling that meeting one-on-one with a buddy would make it easier for me. Any thoughts on why I feel this way?
And yet I have no hesitation and would meet Oman today if I could!
Confusing, huh?
Dragonette
I am Dragon, make me purr
- Joined
- Mar 29, 2001
- Posts
- 6,295
Is that it?
The answer is what?
Is online good?
Yeah, I have some very, very special online ones!
Because it's online, other side of the world, you can let loose.
I do have a very special one, in USA, mega young, less than half my age!
We have chatted for over a year now, we are friends, really good ones, I think I know him and he knows me, he tells me things that I doubt he tells anyone else.
We will never meet, therefore it is safe!
Frustrating often, I have seen pictures of him and he is really cute!
I have persuaded him to join this site and post a couple of his stories, so he is here!
He lives in USA and is 22 and single, as to who he is, you will have to ask me!
Maybe, only with his permission of course!
Trust is the most important thing!
The answer is what?
Is online good?
Yeah, I have some very, very special online ones!
Because it's online, other side of the world, you can let loose.
I do have a very special one, in USA, mega young, less than half my age!
We have chatted for over a year now, we are friends, really good ones, I think I know him and he knows me, he tells me things that I doubt he tells anyone else.
We will never meet, therefore it is safe!
Frustrating often, I have seen pictures of him and he is really cute!
I have persuaded him to join this site and post a couple of his stories, so he is here!
He lives in USA and is 22 and single, as to who he is, you will have to ask me!
Maybe, only with his permission of course!
Trust is the most important thing!
Spanktress
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Nov 13, 2001
- Posts
- 157
Groups or 1-on-1
Jenny ,think about why you want to meet these people. To be purely social, to put faces to names, or to take your relationships to the next level seems it is possible. By that, I mean meeting them in real time & becoming real time friends as well as online. Meeting people in groups can be intimidating, all these new faces at one time, some who you know better online, others you have only read their posts or contributions to the site. Considering your new LDR perhaps wanting to meet people 1-on-1 will allow you to develop more intimate relationships. Will be able to develop their trust, confidence more easily & share your thoughts, feelings, emotions about your LDR with them as well as anything else in life !
*~* Spanks *~*
Jenny ,think about why you want to meet these people. To be purely social, to put faces to names, or to take your relationships to the next level seems it is possible. By that, I mean meeting them in real time & becoming real time friends as well as online. Meeting people in groups can be intimidating, all these new faces at one time, some who you know better online, others you have only read their posts or contributions to the site. Considering your new LDR perhaps wanting to meet people 1-on-1 will allow you to develop more intimate relationships. Will be able to develop their trust, confidence more easily & share your thoughts, feelings, emotions about your LDR with them as well as anything else in life !
*~* Spanks *~*
Savage Kitten
Image IS Everything
- Joined
- Apr 16, 2000
- Posts
- 2,677
I have a few people from the net. Never, ever have I met anyone by myself. I always make sure I bring a friend, or my sis, along. And it is always in a very public place. No matter how much time I have spent "chatting" with them or how well I think I know them, it's better to be safe then sorry.
The worst expierence I had was actually my first. The guy was such a total loser and geek. I had a business trip to Miami so he found me a hotel close to the Market. As a "thank you" I invited him to dinner with my sister and me. He met us at the hotel. The first thing he said to me was "Are you wearing that???" and to my sis, who was still in the bathroom putting on last minute touches he said "my gawd, aren't you ready yet???"
that should have warned me haha... we finally got rid of him in a small club.. .the bouncer thru him out on his ass lol
i'm always a lil anxious and nervous when I first meet people. but it is so exciting and fun to meet new people and interact IRL.
The worst expierence I had was actually my first. The guy was such a total loser and geek. I had a business trip to Miami so he found me a hotel close to the Market. As a "thank you" I invited him to dinner with my sister and me. He met us at the hotel. The first thing he said to me was "Are you wearing that???" and to my sis, who was still in the bathroom putting on last minute touches he said "my gawd, aren't you ready yet???"
that should have warned me haha... we finally got rid of him in a small club.. .the bouncer thru him out on his ass lol
i'm always a lil anxious and nervous when I first meet people. but it is so exciting and fun to meet new people and interact IRL.
JennyOmanHill
trying hard to be mindful
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2001
- Posts
- 11,151
Re: Groups or 1-on-1
As always, Spanktress, you have given me a lot to think about! Eventually I would like to meet these site buddies to match faces with the names, and in some cases, I'm sure friendships will materialize. I guess I'm not quite ready to reveal my "real" outward self to a group right now. And that's why a 1-on-1 meeting seems more appealing to me right now. Thanks for your valuable insight!
Spanktress said:
As always, Spanktress, you have given me a lot to think about! Eventually I would like to meet these site buddies to match faces with the names, and in some cases, I'm sure friendships will materialize. I guess I'm not quite ready to reveal my "real" outward self to a group right now. And that's why a 1-on-1 meeting seems more appealing to me right now. Thanks for your valuable insight!
on_the_verge
agent pro·vo·ca·teur
- Joined
- Jun 16, 2001
- Posts
- 1,526
Re: Re: Groups or 1-on-1
Ask and you shall receive....
Jenny, Tulip and I had a one-on-one meeting a few weeks ago as the others did not show up. It went very well and you can ask her if you care. We did forge and harnessed a friendship, finding it a good idea to have finally met. If you would like to meet, I would welcome it and besides I love to eat and be merry no matter what occasion. Send me a PM or my e-mail is in my profile. Until then...
JennyOmanHill said:
As always, Spanktress, you have given me a lot to think about! Eventually I would like to meet these site buddies to match faces with the names, and in some cases, I'm sure friendships will materialize. I guess I'm not quite ready to reveal my "real" outward self to a group right now. And that's why a 1-on-1 meeting seems more appealing to me right now. Thanks for your valuable insight!
Ask and you shall receive....
Jenny, Tulip and I had a one-on-one meeting a few weeks ago as the others did not show up. It went very well and you can ask her if you care. We did forge and harnessed a friendship, finding it a good idea to have finally met. If you would like to meet, I would welcome it and besides I love to eat and be merry no matter what occasion. Send me a PM or my e-mail is in my profile. Until then...
Spanktress
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Nov 13, 2001
- Posts
- 157
Savage Kitten glad your first experience didnt put you off for good (any plans on coming to Aust.? hehe)
Its funny how you can usually tell within the first few moments of meeting someone how the occassion is going to go, whether its something they say, how they greet you or for me, first eye contact. I am a fan of eye contact
on_the_verge, its wonderful to see you express your enjoyment of meeting someone from O/L over a meal & drink. I say this, as a lot of the time when I've agreed to meet a male from online , most (not all!!) of the time I feel that seems I am agreeing to meeting them, I'm as good as agreeing to sex
Jenny Only you will know what & who you are ready for & comfortable with (well, we all know 1 person you are ready for hehe )
I wish the first person I had met was like on_the_verge. Charming, has given you permission to 'check him out' with someone who has met him, Charming, has expressed what he expects (dinner!) & did I mention charming
Good luck , go eat drink & be merry !!
*~* Spanks *~*
Its funny how you can usually tell within the first few moments of meeting someone how the occassion is going to go, whether its something they say, how they greet you or for me, first eye contact. I am a fan of eye contact
on_the_verge, its wonderful to see you express your enjoyment of meeting someone from O/L over a meal & drink. I say this, as a lot of the time when I've agreed to meet a male from online , most (not all!!) of the time I feel that seems I am agreeing to meeting them, I'm as good as agreeing to sex
Jenny Only you will know what & who you are ready for & comfortable with (well, we all know 1 person you are ready for hehe
) I wish the first person I had met was like on_the_verge. Charming, has given you permission to 'check him out' with someone who has met him, Charming, has expressed what he expects (dinner!) & did I mention charming
Good luck , go eat drink & be merry !!
*~* Spanks *~*
JennyOmanHill
trying hard to be mindful
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2001
- Posts
- 11,151
Spanktress said:Jenny Only you will know what & who you are ready for & comfortable with (well, we all know 1 person you are ready for hehe
*~* Spanks *~*
Yes, Spanktress, you know the guy I'm ready for!
Each day I am feeling better, and will likely meet with a small group from the NYC area in the near future. I may even go without a disguise!
S
ShamelessFlirt
Guest
Good intentions
Met a few people, both from here and my Yahoo chat past. Went into it with no expectations, so came away with no disappointments. Made good friends which I still try and keep in touch with. Mades me look at their writings differently having spent time with them.
Stick with groups, it takes a great deal of trust to let someone know you, someone who the only information you know is information volunteered by them. And trust your gut. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it.
I have a friend who chatted up a guy for a short time, and their conversations were always casuall. She was honest with him, sharing small details thinking nothing of it. He actually showed up uninvited in her kitchen (they don't lock the doors where she comes from). She escorted him out with a shotgun.
The one time I tried to meet an online love turned out miserably.
"Confused"
I've touched her.
She's real.
Can't explain,
how I feel.
Is it worse,
than never having met?
To have seen her,
an not touched her lips yet?
Beheld her.
With my own eyes.
Real.
No online disguise.
Yet how much of her, was really there?
Avoiding me, as though she didn't care.
The whole time my eyes, reflecting despair.
Are we beyond repair?
Did the bond that we shared simply tear?
Whatever the case, it's not fair.
Remembering how my words, one time had touched you.
How my deeds, since have cut you.
What am I to do?
No hope of starting anew.
So I sit here confused.
What we were, difused.
And I simply scratch my head.
Tired, but not wanting to go to bed.
Wide awake, but somehow dead.
What am I to do,
if I can no longer say
"I love you"
Met a few people, both from here and my Yahoo chat past. Went into it with no expectations, so came away with no disappointments. Made good friends which I still try and keep in touch with. Mades me look at their writings differently having spent time with them.
Stick with groups, it takes a great deal of trust to let someone know you, someone who the only information you know is information volunteered by them. And trust your gut. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it.
I have a friend who chatted up a guy for a short time, and their conversations were always casuall. She was honest with him, sharing small details thinking nothing of it. He actually showed up uninvited in her kitchen (they don't lock the doors where she comes from). She escorted him out with a shotgun.
The one time I tried to meet an online love turned out miserably.
"Confused"
I've touched her.
She's real.
Can't explain,
how I feel.
Is it worse,
than never having met?
To have seen her,
an not touched her lips yet?
Beheld her.
With my own eyes.
Real.
No online disguise.
Yet how much of her, was really there?
Avoiding me, as though she didn't care.
The whole time my eyes, reflecting despair.
Are we beyond repair?
Did the bond that we shared simply tear?
Whatever the case, it's not fair.
Remembering how my words, one time had touched you.
How my deeds, since have cut you.
What am I to do?
No hope of starting anew.
So I sit here confused.
What we were, difused.
And I simply scratch my head.
Tired, but not wanting to go to bed.
Wide awake, but somehow dead.
What am I to do,
if I can no longer say
"I love you"
JennyOmanHill
trying hard to be mindful
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2001
- Posts
- 11,151
Re: Good intentions
Wow, Shameless. Very powerful worlds. All your writings have been magnificent, and you can realize how this particular piece is affecting me.
Thanks for the sharing and your poetry.
ShamelessFlirt said:
Wow, Shameless. Very powerful worlds. All your writings have been magnificent, and you can realize how this particular piece is affecting me.
Thanks for the sharing and your poetry.
hi all ..i just ended a online romance ..i thought i was doing the right thing and i feel i made a mistake ..i discovered i have fallen in love with this women who i meet in here but is not a member..i didnt think she could handle me not being a man with alot of money..child support is a killer but i love my boys so it doesnt matter much to me but i thought it would to her ..needless to say i broke her heart and now mine is broken from my own stupidity..so i guess what im trying to say is be up front with someone when you meet online because things can happen ..i didnt think i could fall in love with a person on my screen but i didit started out with sex but after a few times of that we started talking about life then our lifers then it just started to roll after that and we couldnt stop it ..i will never forgive myself for this ..hopefully like they say time heals all wounds
Testarossa
Experienced
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Posts
- 40
Meetings
I arranged to meet a fellow Lit poster about 2 months ago. We'd developed a mutual appreciation for one another in an OOC thread and agreed to meet for coffee during his planned visit to the US. (He lives in Germany.)
We exchanged several PMs and phone calls and -- we did have that coffee together. It was a delightful experience, one that I'll never regret or forget.
~Tes
I arranged to meet a fellow Lit poster about 2 months ago. We'd developed a mutual appreciation for one another in an OOC thread and agreed to meet for coffee during his planned visit to the US. (He lives in Germany.)
We exchanged several PMs and phone calls and -- we did have that coffee together. It was a delightful experience, one that I'll never regret or forget.
~Tes
I've done it twice.
The first time he and i had been talking a month before we met. He and i have a connection i haven't felt with anyone else before-on or offline. No regrets(besides the bit where i fell for him hehe) and we are now close friends 2 years on.
The second time was not so long ago, with someone who was quite eager to meet after six months of chatting. I agreed cos i thought what the hell?! I figured it'd be good to go out and have some fun. Well i did have fun, but have barely heard from him since. Guess he got what he wanted and moved on. No point regretting it-you live and learn!
The first time he and i had been talking a month before we met. He and i have a connection i haven't felt with anyone else before-on or offline. No regrets(besides the bit where i fell for him hehe) and we are now close friends 2 years on.
The second time was not so long ago, with someone who was quite eager to meet after six months of chatting. I agreed cos i thought what the hell?! I figured it'd be good to go out and have some fun. Well i did have fun, but have barely heard from him since. Guess he got what he wanted and moved on. No point regretting it-you live and learn!
