Micromanagement Values and Potential in D/s Relationships

[catalina_francisco]

LOL, the beauty of time is that we sometimes do find we see things we didn't see before, and open ourselves to other concepts....but the time has to right for it to happen positively. I also think in terms of micromanagement, it can be just as you said in other times, or it can be the opposite..it depends a lot on those involved.

Catalina

 

[intothewoods]

I don't think I've ever been truly micromanaged in a work situation. Trying to think...hmm.

The situation you described, rebecca, would drive me crazy. I don't want to have to report to someone every minute of the day. I just don't have time! On the other hand, there are areas in my life where I could use more guidance and supervision than others. But I suppose that's a different thing than micromanagement.

 

[neonflux]

Reading this thread has definitely turned on a light bulb.

I am now convinced that my ex of 14 years would do best as the Dominant partner in a D/s relationship. She needs to micromanage her environment to an extreme- everywhere except the bedroom where she could be very yielding, liked my taking control and also enjoyed (very) light BDSM play - it was the ONLY place I could ever really Top her, LOL. Outside of the bedroom, there is a very specific way to do every little task and appropriate and inappropriate times to do them and deviation from that is greatly distressing to her. (She reminds me a little of your supervisor, EG.)

With her, I am not sure this is due to a lack of confidence so much as it is to a deep need for her to control her surroundings (she is NOT like that in her professional life). Needless to say, we had difficulties living together - in fact, we lived separately for the last 6 years of our relationship. Within a D/s relationship with a woman who craved that type of submission, I think both would thrive.

Neon

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Cat , Intothewoods & Miss Neon thank you for your replies, I read them all with immense interest . I am still mulling this one over to some degree. I have several ideas floating around in my mind currently and they are just not cohesive enough to express yet.

I'll get there , eventually.

 

[BiBunny]

I lived with the utmost of micromanagers for 18 years--my mother. Nothing I ever did was good enough for her. She could always tell me how to do it better and bitch if I didn't. Eventually, things would always end in my saying something like, "Well, if you know so damn much, why don't you do it yourself?" and she refusing to speak to me for several days. Not that I'm bitter or anything.

Now the slightest hint of micromanagement has me running in the opposite direction. I HAD to put up with it when I lived under the same roof as my mother, but I don't HAVE to put up with it now. I have a brain, thank you very much, and if I'm going to fuck something up, I'll do it on my own merits.

Sorry. Raw spot for me. I apologize.

Sometimes I think I am the Anti-Sub, anyway.

 

[Ebonyfire]

I lived with the utmost of micromanagers for 18 years--my mother. Nothing I ever did was good enough for her. She could always tell me how to do it better and bitch if I didn't. Eventually, things would always end in my saying something like, "Well, if you know so damn much, why don't you do it yourself?" and she refusing to speak to me for several days. Not that I'm bitter or anything.

Now the slightest hint of micromanagement has me running in the opposite direction. I HAD to put up with it when I lived under the same roof as my mother, but I don't HAVE to put up with it now. I have a brain, thank you very much, and if I'm going to fuck something up, I'll do it on my own merits.

Sorry. Raw spot for me. I apologize.

Sometimes I think I am the Anti-Sub, anyway.

Why apologize? I was raised by a neat freak. The result is that I resist neatness.

 

[intothewoods]

This thread is starting to make me think I'm the one who has the potential to micromanage. I keep telling myself, no, I usually tell people something like, just do it, I don't care how it gets done. But I have started to be become very particular about the way that I like most things done. My name is intothewoods, and I have control issues. But that doesn't mean I micromanage, right? Wahhhh.

Sigh. I am just one of those girls who needs to be put in her place. What a pain in the ass. On the other hand, I do love rooster...