One a Day

[UpNCumin]

It is a valid point. Sexual intimacy is a need. It isn't on par with food and water but it is a need. Hopefully in a constructive and loving marriage both partners try to keep the other engaged in the manner that Simon indicated.

However, sometimes things aren't going to go as smoothly as we would like. Usually I am more than motivated to jump his bones. However, if I am not feeling it for a while (for any number of reasons that have nothing to do with the quality of our relationship) I don't abandon him.

I think maybe we get too hung up on gender roles and female empowerment that precludes submitting to your husband's authority. My husband has no authority over me (quite the opposite). We are partners. Why is it ok that I insist he spend his saturday morning trimming the hedges but I won't touch his dick unless he executes a flawless routine of sensitivity and sexual motivation?

You want to be liberated? You want to be equal? Grow up. Recognize we all do things for our partners......that is why it is called a partnership. You aren't in the mood? Well guess what, he wasn't in the mood to trim the hedges either. Hopefully most of the time it is romantic and sexual magic, but insisting that always be the case is juvenile and selfish. Don't be above sucking that cock to support your partner.

I think I like you.

 

[policywank]

I think I like you.

lol thank you

 

[Aamazing1]

Indeed

My thoughts?

A guy has to learn all the things that may incline his wife towards actually wanting nearly as much sex as he does. That has to do with a whole lot of things, differently for different couples. So the right questions for a guy who gets married to be asking himself, and checking out intentionally every few years:

What can I be doing to make her feel good about herself?
How do I feed the things which make us feel the hots for each other?
Does she have space in her life for recreation, imagination, girl-friendship ...
How far have I got in understanding her body and her soul?
Am I the lover she dreamed of having one day and if not how can I become him?

In short: it's a life-time of attention to a woman's changing needs and desires.

I am not saying it always works out the way the man hopes it will. Yes, there are self-centred morons who fuck most nights; there are loving and caring husbands who lie awake hurting inside. But for all the randomness of that, we've a massive part to play in setting up the possibility of years of regular great sex.

That's my take.

Most men (not all) can be too self oriented in sex. All in all communication on both ends is key.