Oral Servitude

[NomadLady]

This is hot, I'd like to have been a fly on that wall.

We never met again....he was that freaked out. I tried to assure him that his wife's claim that his cock wasn't large enough was NOT the obvious problem...it was that she had no muscle tone to enjoy intercourse no matter what size the cock.
She had given this poor guy such a "complex" that it was really just sad.

 

[neci]

you know, my dear, great rewards require some whisks.

fucking whisks! my friend came over and we made chile rellenos. trying to beat the damn egg whites was a bitch. they had gotten a little bit of yolk in them on the last egg (out of 8 eggs - we made a lot.) they would not peak. we were switching off, rotating left and right hands. chile rellenos are all about the breading. i took pictures of us trying to beat the eggs, but they came out very blurry. plus, we'd been drinking margaritas, so that didn't help at all.
*note - this is why i need exercise help*

Ahhh this I can completely relate to. If something is not stimulating to me I have a hard time focusing on it. Both cleaning and exercise fall in that category and I have to have my ipod for both, so dirty dancing with the cleaning implements I am quite familiar with as well I hadn’t considered hand beating when I am cooking but I can definitely see the benefits and I am glad you shared that one. It is hard to find ways to work wrists and arms that are easy to incorporate into everyday routine other than ways related to cleaning, so I am sure I will give this one a go. Though i am inwardly cringing already at how much I am likely to feel it.

I exercise with great mumbled irritation, I hate it and my schedule is very often wonky so I too like to use every day opportunities as much as I can.

Like you, I do use the squats rather than bending over. Beyond that… when I’m dancing... oh I mean cleaning I try to incorporate some standing crunches. They are fairly easy and don’t feel so hateful when incorporated as a ‘dance move’ (which I use that terminology loosely). Occasionally, I will wear ankle and/or wrist weights doing the mundane house stuff. When I am just sitting, reading etc I will do some butt crunches. Though nowhere near a squat they are fairly effective considering and much like kegals no one is the wiser. Hehe. When I wake up in the morning, I make myself do a sit up to get up rather than rolling out of bed or for that matter anytime I am lying down and need to get up. Sometimes, if I have the time and/or energy or I don’t have to be up, I may do a few before I ever leave the bed.

Anyway, I don’t know if any of that will be useful to you but those are some things I can think of right now in my sleepy state. I tend to focus on the areas that in some way have started to bother me in the past in lengthy oral pursuits. I want to focus on the oral and not on some random cramp in my leg... that just plain irritates me

the only class i do is yoga. that's just an hour and a half once a week. i'm normally able to get in at least thirty minutes of some kind of cardio two other days a week. i watch videos on youtube that you can dance to. when i'm working, i need to get up and take breaks, so the dancing helps get my blood flowing and my mind working again. if i follow that with some breathing exercises or stretching, i'm more relaxed and focused. what i'd really like is a cock in my mouth, but that's not always feasible. i should add in some neck and shoulder rolls.

the idea or thought of "exercise" turns me off. i have mental blocks. if it's training, it's different. oooooohhhh.... i have a little idea. okay. anyways. several of years ago, i wanted to make a new year's resolution to get into better shape. i hate new year's resolutions. so i decided to commit to having more cardio geared sex. yep. it helped. i hadn't tackled the eating part yet, so the results weren't as visible, but my over all strength and endurance improved.

Oh, I do love it...but it like you said it's funny how many men say (after the fact) that they've never had a REALLY good one.
That reminds me of someone I met a few years ago who was a virgin when he married, first time seeking fun outside the marriage and when we were "doing the deed" and he had his happy moment, mine came just after his and when my Kegel exercises paid off and I clamped down really hard HE FREAKED OUT!!!!! Seems his wife always complained that he wasn't large enough but I think she'd never done a kegel in her life and you could have just driven a 18 wheeler in there, turned it around and drove right back out again.
Funny how perspectives are sometimes soooooooooo not what you think....

*cumspew out the nose*

This is actually a somewhat obscure area of oral that I'm very into.

I like the contest between my cock control, which is excellent from practicing chinese methods for years, and the talents of a top notch oralist.

This is getting into that middle zone between "mouth as hole" and female in control. I like the potential that all my skills might not be enough to retain the seed, that it might be sucked from me "against my will". Sometimes I like to "win" this game, sometimes I like to "lose" it but I'm very, very into the idea of a super-cocky, confident oralist whose attitude is "think you've got what it takes to withhold the seed from ME? Think again, big boy!".

chinese methods of cock control.
while the chinese were over there controlling their godheads,
shakti was working on cultivating the seed.

 

[NomadLady]

*cumspew out the nose*

QUOTE]


Glad I was able to help you with today's cum spewing belly laugh!!!!!!

 

[intothewoods]

This is actually a somewhat obscure area of oral that I'm very into.

I like the contest between my cock control, which is excellent from practicing chinese methods for years, and the talents of a top notch oralist.

This is getting into that middle zone between "mouth as hole" and female in control. I like the potential that all my skills might not be enough to retain the seed, that it might be sucked from me "against my will". Sometimes I like to "win" this game, sometimes I like to "lose" it but I'm very, very into the idea of a super-cocky, confident oralist whose attitude is "think you've got what it takes to withhold the seed from ME? Think again, big boy!".

Power exchange at its best!

 

[SirLeo]

while reciting poetry with exaggerated faces.

well Kama Sutra would be appropriate poetry, or the Rubiyat... Dr. Seuss on the other had probably not. Just saying ya know.....

 

[neci]

*sigh*

 

[neci]

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbp169oCc11qctu36o1_400.jpg

 

[neci]

http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lblhwklbBH1qzlro6o1_400.jpg

heh

 

[neci]

http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbjovt1OeT1qeymw3o1_400.jpg

 

[neci]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lay5c9SLwb1qby2kpo1_400.jpg

 

[neci]

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ladqhlj7Oj1qbitbyo1_400.jpg

 

[neci]

please, just once.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l3p7hubplV1qare83o1_400.jpg

 

[sweepthefloor]

...it was that she had no muscle tone to enjoy intercourse no matter what size the cock.

The cock will be crushed with the vaginal vault- regardless of length- width, or degree of hardness- even if I lay there like a wet watermelon.

 

[NomadLady]

The cock will be crushed with the vaginal vault- regardless of length- width, or degree of hardness- even if I lay there like a wet watermelon.

I'm sure his wife was a wet watermelon....

 

[SirLeo]

I'm sure his wife was a wet watermelon....

Never tried it, but I've heard talk of guys boring a hole in and then fucking a watermelon.....

 

[CaresseDArcy]

the only class i do is yoga. that's just an hour and a half once a week. i'm normally able to get in at least thirty minutes of some kind of cardio two other days a week. i watch videos on youtube that you can dance to. when i'm working, i need to get up and take breaks, so the dancing helps get my blood flowing and my mind working again. if i follow that with some breathing exercises or stretching, i'm more relaxed and focused. what i'd really like is a cock in my mouth, but that's not always feasible. i should add in some neck and shoulder rolls.

the idea or thought of "exercise" turns me off. i have mental blocks. if it's training, it's different. oooooohhhh.... i have a little idea. okay. anyways. several of years ago, i wanted to make a new year's resolution to get into better shape. i hate new year's resolutions. so i decided to commit to having more cardio geared sex. yep. it helped. i hadn't tackled the eating part yet, so the results weren't as visible, but my over all strength and endurance improved.

I have considered yoga especially for some ways to manage tension and relax but honestly I just don’t think I could make it through any class… perhaps because I spend a good deal of my time in classes already. *Shrug*. Whatever the block is I just can’t do it.

I can definitely relate to your feelings on the whole subject of exercise but though I never thought I would like running. I have found I do. There is a bike trail literally right next to my house so I use it when the weather is good, when it isn’t I use the ski machine in the basement. No one usually wants to accompany you when you run lol and so it has kind of become my “me” time. So that is my cardio, with my schedule I am down to 3-4 days if I’m lucky. It is peaceful other than the one time I was confronted and then stalked by a deer. Yes, true but another story. Other than that I do some strength training and stretching but nothing rigid or scheduled or the block comes up and I am done.

Personally I agree with you on the cock in the mouth. Definitely preferable but as You said not always feasible… much like cardio sex in my world

So…. lawd I second that sigh … However, at least now I have some more things to add to my Christmas list… a penis pacifier and a candy cock. brilliant.

 

[CaresseDArcy]

.....

 

[CaresseDArcy]

if sperm could talk??...

 

[rosco rathbone]

I'll Reprint This Classic

Never tried it, but I've heard talk of guys boring a hole in and then fucking a watermelon.....

"Brogans stood in the tracks he left. Walking up, back, turning. Toeing the bunged melons lying in the sun. A slow spout of black ants pluming forth. A yellowjacket.

He came again that night. In a persimmon tree at the edge of the field, a mockingbird whistled him back but he would not hear. Down past the corn he came and into the dark of the melonpatch with stark wooden lubricity, looking once toward the lightless house and then going to his knees in the rich and wineslaked loam.

When the light of the sealedbeam cut over the field he was lying prone upon a watermelon with his overalls about his knees. The beam swept pase, stopped, returned to fix upon his alabaster nates looming moonlike out of the dark. He rose vertically, pale, weightless, like some grim tellurian wraith, up over the violated fruit with arms horrible and off across the fields hauling wildly at the folds of old rank denim that hobbled him.

Hold it! a voice called.

He had no ear for such news. The dry bracked that rimmed the field crashed about him. He crossed the stand of cane in a a series of diminishing reports and went over the top of the honeysuckle in graceful levitation and lit in the road in the lights of a car rounding the curve. The car braked and slewed in the gravel. A crazed figure dressing on the run blown out of the dark wall of summer green and into the road. In the distance the train called for the crossing.

Two pairs of brogans went along the rows.

You ain't going to believe this.

Knowing you for a born liar I most probably wont.

Somebody has been fuckin my watermelons.

What?

I said somebody has been...

No. No. Damn you if you aint got a warped mind.

I'm tellin' you...

I don't want to hear it.

Looky here.

And here.

They went along the outer row of the melonpatch. He stopped to nudge a melon with his toe. Yellowjackets snarled in the seepage. Some were ruined a good time past and lay soft with rot, wrinkled with imminent collapse.

It does look like it, dont it.
I'm tellin ye I seen him. I didn't know what the hell was going on when he dropped his drawers. Then when I seen what he was up to I still didn't believe it. But yonder they lay.

What do you aim to do?
Hell, I don't know. It's about too late to do anything. He's damn near screwed the whole patch. I don't see wht he couldn't of stuck to just one. Or a few.

Well, I guess he takes himself for a lover. Sort of like a sailor in a whorehouse.

I reckon what it was, he didn't take to the idea of gettin bit on the head of his pecker by one of them waspers. I suppose he showed good judgement there.

What was he, just a young feller?

I don't know about how young he was, but he was as active a feller as I've seen in a good while.

Well. I don't reckon he'll be back.

I don't know. A man as fast as he is ought not to be qualmy about goin anywheres he took a notion. TO steal or whatever.

What if he does come back?

I'll catch him if he does.

And then what?

Well, I don't know. Be kindly embarrasin now I think about it.

I'd get some work out of him is what I'd do.

Ought to I reckon. I don't know.

You reckon to call the sheriff?

And tell him what?

They were walking slowly along the rows.

It's just the damndest thing I ever heard of. Ain't it you? What are you grinnin at? It ain't funny. A thing like that. To me it aint.

He waited and waited at the field's edge watching the house and listening. From the dark of the corn, they saw him pass, lean and angular, a slavering nightshade among the moonsprung vines, over the shadowed blue and furrowed summer land. They gripped each other's arm.

It's him.

I hope it is. I'd hate to think of there bein' two of 'em.

Before them in the field there appeared sudden and apparitional a starkly pale set of legs galvanized out of the night like a pair of white flannel drawers.

Thow the light to him.

He ain't mounted.

Thow it to him.

He was standing in the middle of the patch facing them, blinking, his overalls about his ankles.

Hold it right there old buddy. DOn't move.

But he did. He caught up the bib of his overalls in both hands and turned to run. The voice called out again. He had the straps clenched in his fist, making for the field's edge. The train bawled twice out there in the darkness. Now beg God's mercy, lecher. Unnatural. FInger coiled, blind sight, a shadow. Done in a burst of flame. Could I call back that skeltering lead."

-Cormac McCarthy Suttree 1979

 

[NomadLady]

Never tried it, but I've heard talk of guys boring a hole in and then fucking a watermelon.....

That was sorta what I mean....small hole but 'wide open' once inside....

 

[neci]

my friend came over tonight, and i made her a martini. she'd never had one before. told me it tasted like verga.

 

[rosco rathbone]

oral around the internet

Hello. I'm 22 year old female and I have few questions about some facts from sex life. You see, since two months back, I have never practiced an oral sex with anyone.
I don’t know is it right or not but I have never asked from anyone to do it to me and I have never done it to anyone. I don’t know why but I just didn’t like doing it. A couple of times my boyfriend has mentioned to me how he does like oral sex and how he would like for me to change my opinions on this subject. So, I did it few times and now he become addicted and every our sex must have beginning and completion with oral sex. I don’t know what to do but it’s making me nervous and frustrating.

Hello. I'm a girl and I will tell you some facts you should definitely know. You see, men were addicted on oral sex for ages now, but I definitely think that this has increased in a past few years.
The reason for me is unknown.
I really do believe that there is nothing to do with the real sensation of having their penises in woman’s mouth but with the sensation of woman being subordinated to them. Some women love to do it and some are repulsive about it.
Good thing about all this is that, if you don’t want to do it than you don’t have to do it! My suggestion is- tell your boyfriend again that you don’t like doing it and if he can't live with that fact- dump the bustard. There are plenty of men who would like to be with you just like you are.

addicted to oral!!!!!

 

[sweepthefloor]

Cock Suckers Anonymous

Janey: Hi, my name is Janey. I am addicted to performing oral sex on the male species.

Group: Welcome Janey.

Janey: Ever since I got that first filthy load in my mouth, that first management of my airway- I have been thinking about it, and serving cock ever since. There have been many times where I lied and said: “No, I have never sucked cock before- this is the first cock I ever sucked” <blush>

Group: Thanks for sharing.

*Cock Suckers Anonymous= suck ninety cocks in ninety days and you get a keychain from your sponsor.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Janey: Hi, my name is Janey. I am addicted to performing oral sex on the male species.

Group: Welcome Janey.

Janey: Ever since I got that first filthy load in my mouth, that first management of my airway- I have been thinking about it, and serving cock ever since. There have been many times where I lied and said: “No, I have never sucked cock before- this is the first cock I ever sucked” <blush>

Group: Thanks for sharing.

*Cock Suckers Anonymous= suck ninety cocks in ninety days and you get a keychain from your sponsor.

oralists anonymous

spermaholics anonymous

 

[sweepthefloor]

oralists anonymous

This does sound more professional. "I am going to my OA meeting" as opposed to "Time to go to the CSA meeting"--

-- because I really want that keychain