poll: best improvised sex toys?

Various improvised implements I have seen in use.

Banana
Cucumber, English and ordinary. (she liked big ones)
Windshield ice scraper handle
Screwdriver handle
Steel dumbbell, 3lb.
A stick
Popsicle
Hose going to an air powered sander. (very intense, I tried it too )
Men’s aftershave bottle
Various candles
Liquor bottle (can’t remember brand but it was slim)
Water bottle, 500ml size
 
Word of advice from a former volunteer ambulance driver...DO NOT use a long refrigerator light bulb. Yes, someone did this. It was the slowest and smoothest ride I ever did to an ER. They get stuck and you really dont want them to break.
 
Various improvised implements I have seen in use.


Popsicle

Not exactly improvised, but my story "Ginnie's Ice Play" described how to make a "Cocksicle." And a "Vadge-sicle" for the guys.
Various candles

I'm glad somebody mentioned that. Until I could afford better toys, candles were my go-go tool.

Liquor bottle (can’t remember brand but it was slim)

Please include champagne bottles... nice and thick so they won't break, lovely little ridge at the cap. I used one of those once or twice. They worked well, and probably would have worked better had I not helped to dispose of the contents beforehand.
 
electric toothbrush. Also, ahem, next time you whip out the power washer straddle the hose. The vibrations on your balls will have your cock dripping!
 
Most erotic device that I've witnessed was a subbie's reaction while hovering over a pulsing, underwater jacuzzi-jet in a hot tub. This was after I told her the previous two rounds, we'd just experienced, had probably done me in for the night. Boy was I wrong. The flashing underwater lights and stereo music coming out of this deluxe tub just added to the experience.
 
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