Punching, kicking, etc. in D/s...

[Tiestheknots]

Interesting Discussion

As the old philosopher once said,"To each his own".....

I teach a bondage course for one of the local BDSM clubs and the subtitle of the course is "How to have all kinds of kinky fun with your lover and stay out of the emergency room"... You get the idea...

I am a little disturbed by osg's description of her face. This sort of thing attracts the attention of family, friends, colleagues, cops and all manner of folks who are clueless about the "lifestyle". From a practical standpoint, couples don't need this kind of attention.

Finger bruises on your ass are not difficult to hide from the general public. When my sub deserves it, she gets taken over my knee and spanked hard with my hand. It is both humiliating and quite painful, and leads to all manner of kinky fun....

I wouldn't punch anyone in the face that I did not want to go down with serious injuries. The harder I can hit them, the harder they go down. If a sub needed this kind of treatment from me, then things couldn't work for us.

Domestic violence is about being a bully, and I have a serious level of distaste for bullies. My own perpective on D/s is that it is about intensity, sexual, physical and most of all emotional... And I think two people can get there without split lips or bruises on your face...

Just my two cents worth...

 

[ownedsubgal]

It is probably in line with how I am generally not turned on by rape fantasy, and haven't really gotten much into rape scenes. I have no interest in crossing the line into violence when it comes to sexuality. I like to keep the two basically seperate, even if elements of each blend into the other. There are just lines I won't cross. I don't want to strike either of my gals with a closed fist any more than I wanted to beat Danny down and bugger him.

lol..understood. tho i would like to express that in my own relationship, that type of violence is something completely outside of sexuality. not that my Master hasn't popped me with a closed hand every now and again during sex, but any real beating is either a matter of discipline, punishment or service. discipline would be that quick one to the arm or gut, no words expressed, when i take a minor step out of line. this is something he has the uncanny ability to do anywhere, in front of anyone, without ever being noticed. punishment is of course self-explainatory...i flocked up big time, now i have to pay the piper, and more than likely my actions have brought about feelings of frustration in my Master, and he needs the physical release of beating me that way as much as i need the penance. service would be times when the source of his frustrations, angers, irritations, etc. are in the outside world, and he wishes to use me as his release. sometimes those beatings can actually be more intense than punishments.

but is it some horny sexy thing? not hardly. just a small facet of everyday life, and a physical form of expression that comes naturally to my Master.

oh and on the issue of controlled fighting/boxing/MA....i have heard of some Dominants and submissive couples who actually "spar" with each other, where the submissive is encouraged to give it her all and there are lots of hard body blows, kicks, etc. going both ways. not sure if it's a sexual thing or a stress relief thing, but i suppose it could go both ways.

 

[Homburg]

lol..understood. tho i would like to express that in my own relationship, that type of violence is something completely outside of sexuality. not that my Master hasn't popped me with a closed hand every now and again during sex, but any real beating is either a matter of discipline, punishment or service. discipline would be that quick one to the arm or gut, no words expressed, when i take a minor step out of line. this is something he has the uncanny ability to do anywhere, in front of anyone, without ever being noticed. punishment is of course self-explainatory...i flocked up big time, now i have to pay the piper, and more than likely my actions have brought about feelings of frustration in my Master, and he needs the physical release of beating me that way as much as i need the penance. service would be times when the source of his frustrations, angers, irritations, etc. are in the outside world, and he wishes to use me as his release. sometimes those beatings can actually be more intense than punishments.

but is it some horny sexy thing? not hardly. just a small facet of everyday life, and a physical form of expression that comes naturally to my Master.

oh and on the issue of controlled fighting/boxing/MA....i have heard of some Dominants and submissive couples who actually "spar" with each other, where the submissive is encouraged to give it her all and there are lots of hard body blows, kicks, etc. going both ways. not sure if it's a sexual thing or a stress relief thing, but i suppose it could go both ways.

Makes more sense when you explain it as a non-sexual thing. Then again, I have friends that I can call for that sort of expression. As I mentioned above, I have a disconnect when ti comes to friends. Well, male friends. Consensual violence is much more acceptable. That said, I won't do it with someone unless I feel like they are competent enough to protect themselves.

 

[YourCaptor]

what makes a punch to the face evoke such reactions, but not a whipping to the point of blood flying?

A punch is a universal sign of attack. Imagine if you will, you are on the street, and someone gets sucker punched. That is obviously an attack. This is how most people see it with few exceptions.

A whipping, even an intense one, especially in a sexual situation, is not seen as an attack. Its more of a punishment, or something erotic.

The new girl probably just needs to make that new association.

She probably already knows (punch + ring = sport), so it can be associated with concepts other then attack.

It could help if you showed her. If she sees that you don't flinch out of fear of your master, and that your master does not strike out of hatred for you, something could click in her brain.