...seduce someone?
- Thread starter Velvet_Glove
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Velvet_Glove
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The results I wanted
I waste too much time worrying.
Dinner was good. I tested the water by flirting...alot. Drink a little more wine than I usually do (okay, a lot more wine). He asked if I was trying to get drunk. All the good lines I got from here went flying out of my head and I blurted, I am trying to seduce you.
Things got a whole lot better in a hurry.
It was the age difference holding him back. My theory about older men has been validated - skilled, controlled and attentive.
Wow.
I waste too much time worrying.
Dinner was good. I tested the water by flirting...alot. Drink a little more wine than I usually do (okay, a lot more wine). He asked if I was trying to get drunk. All the good lines I got from here went flying out of my head and I blurted, I am trying to seduce you.
Things got a whole lot better in a hurry.
It was the age difference holding him back. My theory about older men has been validated - skilled, controlled and attentive.
Wow.
RUbensBeautY
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tommynova2001
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Colonel Hogan has it entirely right..
...I would read and re-read what he wrote until you actually believe it.
The only shred at all of an alternative to what he outlined is:
That he in fact right now and always has had an interest in you sexually or romantically or both. (17 years younger if he is not infirm, he has thought of you sexually) That the only reason he hasn't come on to you is not something sappy like the fact that he wants to "ruing" the friendship, but rather His mind refuses to believe his good fortune. I have to believe that you are giving off some kind of sign of interest, but perhaps it just seems to good to be true.
Guy's have instant fantasy worlds s[ring up un-bidden around any girl that so much as doesn't say GO AWAY. With wisdom and maturity, one eventually realizes that in 99.9% of the cases the look, the perceived flirt, the innuendo is all in ones own mind. You learn to enjoy the moment fr its own sake and don't actually say anything that will make both of you feel awkward.
The fact that he keeps you in his orbit, is because you add something to his life. Perhaps you make him feel youthful, but if he is old enough to have been through a time or two of making an awkward pass, maybe he has learned that an un-requieted crush is worth something in its own right.
EDIT: NOTE TO SELF - READ THE WHOLE THREAD NEXT TIME......
congratulations...so apparently he didn't think you would go for him because of the age?
...I would read and re-read what he wrote until you actually believe it.
The only shred at all of an alternative to what he outlined is:
That he in fact right now and always has had an interest in you sexually or romantically or both. (17 years younger if he is not infirm, he has thought of you sexually) That the only reason he hasn't come on to you is not something sappy like the fact that he wants to "ruing" the friendship, but rather His mind refuses to believe his good fortune. I have to believe that you are giving off some kind of sign of interest, but perhaps it just seems to good to be true.
Guy's have instant fantasy worlds s[ring up un-bidden around any girl that so much as doesn't say GO AWAY. With wisdom and maturity, one eventually realizes that in 99.9% of the cases the look, the perceived flirt, the innuendo is all in ones own mind. You learn to enjoy the moment fr its own sake and don't actually say anything that will make both of you feel awkward.
The fact that he keeps you in his orbit, is because you add something to his life. Perhaps you make him feel youthful, but if he is old enough to have been through a time or two of making an awkward pass, maybe he has learned that an un-requieted crush is worth something in its own right.
EDIT: NOTE TO SELF - READ THE WHOLE THREAD NEXT TIME......
congratulations...so apparently he didn't think you would go for him because of the age?
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helix27
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see in the end that pretty much worked.
raggedyann
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I compliment the person first, smile alot, tell them how good they are at what they are doing and the rest seems to follow
Velvet_Glove
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It was mostly the age difference. Mostly.
We got to be friends in the first place because we were both going through a divorce at the same time and used each other as sounding boards through the process. He says he didn't want to seem like he was taking advantage during a difficult time.
Plus, he said I give off a "nice girl" vibe. I have no idea what this means - I've never been told that before.
Colonel Hogan
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"Nice girl" vibe means you probably dress professionally, don't wear tons of make-up and are not known to swear like a sailor.
Guys assume a lot based on visual cues. It's like that school marm transformation scene wear a hot model is wearing black horned-rimmed glasses, a frilly, high-necked blouse with her hair tied back in a bun. Obviously sexually repressed. Suddenly, the glasses come off, the hair comes down and the top three buttons of the blouse are undone. Party time!!
Guys often find it hard to believe that "nice girls" can be sexual dynamos or that, conversely, porn stars, prostitutes and pole dancers are also human beings worthy of common courtesies.
Not that you asked, but I would say that your next challenge is to make certain that he didn't go to bed with you simply because you made yourself available (congratulations on that, btw) and that you also haven't knocked yourself off some lofty pedestal that he probably shouldn't have had you on anyway.
I guarantee he sees you differently now. It is in your mutual best interests to make certain his new mental image is an accurate reflection of who you know you are.
Guys assume a lot based on visual cues. It's like that school marm transformation scene wear a hot model is wearing black horned-rimmed glasses, a frilly, high-necked blouse with her hair tied back in a bun. Obviously sexually repressed. Suddenly, the glasses come off, the hair comes down and the top three buttons of the blouse are undone. Party time!!
Guys often find it hard to believe that "nice girls" can be sexual dynamos or that, conversely, porn stars, prostitutes and pole dancers are also human beings worthy of common courtesies.
Not that you asked, but I would say that your next challenge is to make certain that he didn't go to bed with you simply because you made yourself available (congratulations on that, btw) and that you also haven't knocked yourself off some lofty pedestal that he probably shouldn't have had you on anyway.
I guarantee he sees you differently now. It is in your mutual best interests to make certain his new mental image is an accurate reflection of who you know you are.
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Velvet_Glove
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I have that fear - any port in a storm?
We've met for lunch and talked this week - I think everything was okay. The contact he initiated has gone a long way in relieving the nervousness I was feeling.
I'm to help him pick out Christmas gifts for his daughter this weekend - which has become something of a tradition - 3rd year for it.
I'm okay with being friends with benefits.
We've met for lunch and talked this week - I think everything was okay. The contact he initiated has gone a long way in relieving the nervousness I was feeling.
I'm to help him pick out Christmas gifts for his daughter this weekend - which has become something of a tradition - 3rd year for it.
I'm okay with being friends with benefits.
