"Spreading Seeds"

[JackLuis]

I check this story for new chapters regularly. I don't really have any comments other than I'm still enjoying it. I'm more into storyline and character development than just descriptions of sex -- I often skip over those 'cause they're often too long and just detract from the story. IMHO, sex scenes should be like seasoning in a good meal -- they can add immensely to the meal, but you wouldn't want too much of it. You seem to have hit a pretty happy medium.

ClimbHi

Thank you for hitting the thread, I was afraid I was just talking to myself.

I have been thinking of reducing the "Blow by Blow" style of the sex portions to focus on the story a little more. Once I can get over a rough patch I'm trying to do now I have a lot more drafted to expand the plot/story.

Because the manner of writing a series for Lit I feel that I need to include at least one sex scene in each chapter. Besides what would the world be like if Josh wasn't humping his little heart out?

 

[ClimbHi]

One other thing . . .

One reason that might explain lower-than-expected numbers . . .

I actually prefer the longer, serial-style stories. (Which, I think, puts me firmly in a minority around here. LOL) But, in return for my commitment to the author/story, I kinda expect the author to keep his end of the deal up. I've followed a number of fairly long stories here, only to have the author drop out for a long time, or even permanently. If the posting stops for too long, I lose the story line, forget characters and plot details, . . . . So I kinda lose interest in following it and drop such stories off my "watch list".

I haven't given up on this one -- at least you keep me/us informed of progress between posts (tho' I suspect most don't bother to check this thread), and that helps in that at least I know you haven't abandoned the project. (Still, I can no longer name most of the the main characters, or describe how they fit into the big picture.) But I'm sure there would be more readers if the story was posted in more regular installments.

Don't take this wrong -- I know most of the authors on here have a real life that sometimes gets in the way of writing, so I'm not complaining. Just offering some rationale for the numbers.

ClimbHi

 

[JackLuis]

One reason that might explain lower-than-expected numbers . . .

Don't take this wrong -- I know most of the authors on here have a real life that sometimes gets in the way of writing, so I'm not complaining. Just offering some rationale for the numbers.

ClimbHi

I understand your comment on the number of characters. I hope to tie the cast to a few after Josh gets back from his trip. There will be new characters but Josh and a few of the girls will carry the story.

I started this not knowing where it would take me and am now figuring it out

If I can get Josh to finish up Chapter #35 I'll move the story along a little faster, but he is such a slut that it is hard to get him moving past the next pussy. LOL.

I wrote about four notebooks full of after the trip stuff and will have to type it in. I shifted to a note book last summer so I could write on the patio. The mistake I made was to bypass the trip and now I have to finish up the trip and get him set up for the next adventure, "The Goat Trail".

Perhaps I should wind up the story and then release "The Goat Trail" as a second story? Wadda ya think?

 

[ClimbHi]

Hmmm . . .

"I understand your comment on the number of characters. I hope to tie the cast to a few after Josh gets back from his trip."

I hadn't thought I had made any comment on the number of characters.? Maybe that's why I'm a reader and not an author -- inherent inability to draft clear statements! ;-)

No, I'm saying that I (and perhaps others) am hard pressed to name and/or identify characters, or remember who "Becky or "Bob" is and how they fit into a story, when it's been six months since I read the previous chapters. Could be six, or sixty, characters, no matter -- time simply dims the details.

But then, maybe I'm just gettin' old. ;-)

As for bifurcating the story, only if the new tale would stand on its own, without endless references to the prior story chapters that the reader may or may not remember, or may even not have read.

Pet Peeve: Stories that start "This story is self-contained, but you may wanna read My First Story for context." TRANSLATION: "This story is NOT self-contained and makes endless assumptions that you're familiar with the characters and what has gone before and, unless you wanna waste your time, read My First Story before you venture forth."

ClimbHi

 

[JackLuis]

"I understand your comment on the number of characters. I hope to tie the cast to a few after Josh gets back from his trip."

I hadn't thought I had made any comment on the number of characters.? Maybe that's why I'm a reader and not an author -- inherent inability to draft clear statements! ;-)

No, I'm saying that I (and perhaps others) am hard pressed to name and/or identify characters, or remember who "Becky or "Bob" is and how they fit into a story, when it's been six months since I read the previous chapters. Could be six, or sixty, characters, no matter -- time simply dims the details.

But then, maybe I'm just gettin' old. ;-)

As for bifurcating the story, only if the new tale would stand on its own, without endless references to the prior story chapters that the reader may or may not remember, or may even not have read.

Pet Peeve: Stories that start "This story is self-contained, but you may wanna read My First Story for context." TRANSLATION: "This story is NOT self-contained and makes endless assumptions that you're familiar with the characters and what has gone before and, unless you wanna waste your time, read My First Story before you venture forth."

ClimbHi

Well SS has a lot of women and they show up in one chapter and kinda fade away, then Josh see's them maybe two or three chapters later. I don't worry about it much but a lot of the chapters get more reads than others. I think because of the sub headings.

If I do bifurcate the story the First Chapter will be a long one to set the stage for new readers. It might be good to "Ride into Burny" again and describe the scene, year and circumstances.

Hell even I forget who is who sometimes and have to reread the chapters to remember. It is a good thing Burny is so lightly populated.

 

[JackLuis]

Chapter 35 finally!

I put Chapter 35 "A Religious Experience" up on Lit today, it should be out in a few days.

This Chapter is very long, 24,350 words or so. Some people said they liked the shorter chapters, but I couldn't contain this chapter. The next few will be shorter for the Short Lovers.

Josh learns about the real reason for Burney and finds two Goddesses who are motivated to drain him dry.

I hope you find it enjoyable.

 

[JackLuis]

Well Chapter 35 is out now so all you "Seed's" fans have a new Long story to read.
Over 200 reads, and I guess most of them read the whole thing.

Ten votes and a 4.6! Wow girls and guys I feel like you all liked it. Maybe that will get my juices moving to finish the trip.

I looks like I have 2,000 or so readers that are following the story, although since #31 the numbers have fallen off a bit.

Only one comment though:

" 03/20/09 By: Anonymous in usa
I was afraid you had abandoned us but this is a good answer to that. I know now that I can look forward to more chapters. "

I will start on #36 today and it will be a fast (short) exposition chapter. After a 25,000 word chapter I need something a little shorter for a while.

 

[JackLuis]

Chapter # 35

Wow I looked in to see how #35 was doing, 778 reads and 13 votes for a avg, 4.54!

It was only 200 reads this morning with 4.6 avg.

Ok Ok, who gave me the 4?

 

[JackLuis]

I checked the story while waiting for my coffee to brew this morning and WoW!

Reads are up to 2032 with 16 votes for a 4.62! Almost 85 per hour for the first 24 hours.

Now I have to start #36. I just can't let my fans down.

Okay more short chapters?

 

[JackLuis]

I've got the start of #36 and I see that #35 has 21 votes for a 4.52 avg.
Surprisingly the # reads is 3249 and almost twice the reads of #34?

#34 has a higher score 4.70 and 23 votes but only 1755 reads?

The first chapter has over 16,000 reads and yet the following only only 5,000?

I must be losing a lot of readers in the first chapter?

 

[Acal]

Hey buddy I just got published so when I have time i'll read your novel and give you some feedback on how to help you.

Don't give up on it!! That is the worst thing you can do as an author is just abandonding a story before its finished.

First thing you need to do though is to delete any unessesary scenes anything that is just there because it is, should go into the garbage bin because they are either taking away from the story or not adding anything useful to it.

Another thing you should watch is are you putting to much detail in that it takes up half a chapter to just describe things. That isn't a good way to write a novel because it just ends up boring people and they most likely wont want to continue reading because of the dragged out descriptions. Or are you putting not enough detail in? One or two lines isn't really suitable for describing a scene. One to two paragraphs is optimal for describing a scene.

For emotion scenes take your time and describe everything that is happening, rushing through it and skipping over things just ruins the feel the scene is trying to create.

 

[Acal]

I've got the start of #36 and I see that #35 has 21 votes for a 4.52 avg.
Surprisingly the # reads is 3249 and almost twice the reads of #34?

#34 has a higher score 4.70 and 23 votes but only 1755 reads?

The first chapter has over 16,000 reads and yet the following only only 5,000?

I must be losing a lot of readers in the first chapter?

The read counts can be incredibly deceptive, 16k reads in your first chapter might actually be how people are accessing your other chapters. Every time the page is opened by somebody it registers as a hit count. You could have only had 5,000 people reading it but those 5,000 have opened the page at least three times each to register as 16,000

 

[JackLuis]

Acal:

Thanks for the bump. What you said about Chapter #1 and the repetitive hits, Could be? I hadn't thought about it that way.

Yes there is a lot of "Stuff" in the story. I suppose that I have embellished the story a bit, but because of the setting I kind'a had too. You will see what I mean if you read it.

I probably will edit it to be slimmer after I finish the plot line.

 

[JackLuis]

Well folks I admit that Chapter 36 is only half done and I just can't work up the enthusiasm to finish Chapter 36, nor for 37 which will finish the trip. I have Chapter 38-42 all done and just waiting.

What should I do? Put up #36 as is with a -Narritive intro to #38 as #37?

 

[JackLuis]

Well it's June and almost July and I still haven't been able to finish #36.
Oh I have plans for it and some of the ideas are pretty good but I have been captured by another story that I drafted for NaNoWiMo.

I wanted to finish #36 and put up #37-40 before I took a break to work on "The Interrupted Tale", which is a series that will be a series of shorter stories about a whole new set of characters and situations.

Perhaps I'll just start releasing "TIT" and come back to "SS" after I get the first part of "TIT" up and see if my readers follow me?

 

[JackLuis]

I checked #35 and see that it is setting at a 4.48 with 3,564 reads and 21 votes. since March.

#34 is 4.77 with 1,946 reads and 22 votes.

I thought that #35 being longer, as some readers asked for would do better?

I guess that proves more sex isn't necessarily going to draw higher scores?

 

[JackLuis]

Well here it is July and almost August and I still haven't been able to finish the trip, shit.
I got a comment on #36

"What a great story, I've just read it from beginning to end in one hit. What I want to know is why you spoiled it with silly mistakes, malapropisms and bad punctuation. Just using a spell checker isn't good enough, if you're using a proper word in the wrong place it won't show up. Can you please read what you've written before you post it? I voted fours and occasional threes when it should have been fours and fives; better still, read it aloud, that will suggest the correct punctuation. Sorry for the negativity, I don't want to discourage you in any way, I just think you could be much better! As an ex soldier I'm sure you like to keep everything tidy."


Thanks for the input. I'm glad you like the story.

To anyone who cares, I do read and correct as much as I can, but I guess I am a failure as an editor. Most of the chapters are gone over 30-50 times before I post them. I guess my public education wasn't that good, I know my spelling is horrid, and my typing is worse, but I do try. Getting an editor for a 300,000 page story is tough so I hope that you will bare with me as I try to keep Josh fulfilling his task to save humanity.

 

[JackLuis]

September and still stalled on the story. Shit.

I'll go write it now!

 

[Teloz]

Go for it!

September and still stalled on the story. Shit.

I'll go write it now!

Just get your ideas down Jack, you can flesh them out later. When you have something you like, email it off to me and I'll edit it for you, or if you don't fancy an English gnome try another editor or two. Personally I would be proud to help because I love your story.

Speaking as a reader, the story is much more important to me than the sex! Yes, the sex is good, but the dystopic world you've created is really interesting, and Josh's adventures in it are great.

Speaking as an editor, yes, your story does need a little polishing, but it is still your story and would remain so. Don't give up my friend, there are so many people waiting for the next chapter and it's there, inside you just waiting to be drawn out.

 

[JackLuis]

dystopic?
–noun
a society characterized by human misery, as squalor, oppression, disease, and overcrowding.

Burney is hardly dystopic but it is a little strange to the modern day. I think we see in Burney's various groups the kind of freedom that so many women talk about but so few achieve.

The Sisters and the Bahia each look after their own in a different way and for different objectives and women can join or not join either or both. Freedom.

 

[JackLuis]

At long Last!

Today I posted Chapter 36, "The Bear".

I have #37 half written and the next two chapters framed, then three chapters written and waiting.

I hope I can finish this by November when NaNoWriMo starts.

 

[JackLuis]

At long last, no really!

I put up "The Bear" and had it rejected because all Laural got was gibbrish. I hadn't accepted the edits and so she rejected it and that took a few days, until I figured out what was wrong?

It went up finally on the 15th and has 1029 reads and 19 votes. Not bad. only a 4.11 score but it is early days.

The problem that has been plaguing me stills plagues me, I cant write the scene that needs to be written because... ahhhhhhhh Crap!

Whew, that feels better.

 

[JackLuis]

I checked the read, votes and score of #36 to see how it was coming along and to my surprise it was 127X reads, 19 Votes and 4.56!

How happy I was! That is until a few minutes ago I looked again and it was
1276, 18 and 4.28?

I guess it is the sweep software deleting odd votes? Still a 4.28 is almost average (~4.3 is average).

Most of my stuff builds its score with time and #36 has only been up since the 15th, so I can wait.

Interestingly the series has 18 Red H's so half of the chapters are "Hot" and a few more are almost hot.

 

[JackLuis]

Well is been two weeks since "The Bear" (#36) went up and it is just now making average of a 4.36 score on 22 votes and 1491 reads.

Not too bad, but it is one of those "bridge" chapters and I hadn't expected it to really score.

I have however put up #37 "Topock" and it is only 4.05, on 21 votes, I guess because nobody get fucked?

#38, "Topock Frolics" has only been up four days and while the first five votes were all fives, it now has 13 votes and is holding at 4.46, just barely not an H.
Only 915 reads though so under half the normal readership.

I have #39 in it's second edit and should be able to put it up soon.

#40 is in process and should be up in a couple of weeks. I may hold #39 so I can put it up with #40 so the readership gets the full impact of the two closely related chapters.

One good thing is that Teloz has edited #'s 36-39 so the sories are easier to read without my mistakes.

Thank you, oh Gnome of Nottingham-shire

#41 is in the formative stages where I drink a lot of gin and watch a lot of porn. God, erotic writing takes so much research!

 

[JackLuis]

I just read the sticky and decided to put in a link to the story.

Here is the link to all the chapters.